What’s Behind Trying to Be Original

July 21, 2022

By Li Zhi, China

In 2019, I was producing videos in the church. Because I had performed this duty for a long time and had some experience and skills, I was effective at this duty. My brothers and sisters thought very highly of me, brothers and sisters from another group often came to me when they encountered problems, and even the supervisor would sometimes ask me technical questions. All of this made me quite happy. I thought that although I wasn’t necessarily an expert at this work, among the brothers and sisters in my group, I was one of the best in terms of professional skills, and I felt like I was a valuable talent.

One day, two newly elected supervisors came to learn about our work. When I learned that the professional skills of the two sisters weren’t as good as mine, I unconsciously felt a sense of superiority. Unexpectedly, they pointed out some problems after they saw some of my works. This made me feel very uncomfortable. It was embarrassing. So, I didn’t want to take their advice. I thought, “Are your skills better than mine? If you point out my problems, what will my brothers and sisters think of me? Will they say the senior group member can’t do anything? This won’t do. I can’t accept this advice. I have to refute it.” So, I looked up some professional information, and completely refuted the supervisors’ opinion in front of everyone. The two supervisors said, “If our views are inappropriate, then we’ll do what you suggest for now.” Hearing them say that, I was very proud, and I felt I had reclaimed my image. Later, the supervisors opened up about their state during a gathering, saying they felt constrained in our group. Even if they saw problems, they didn’t dare point them out for fear of being rejected. At the time, I was superficially aware that I was a little arrogant, but I didn’t genuinely reflect on myself. Later, a new supervisor, Sister Xiang, was appointed to follow up on our work. Her caliber and professional skills were very good, and she was a fast learner. I remember once, a new group member, Brother Wang, had some problems in a video he was making, and several of us discussed it but found no solution, so someone suggested we wait for Sister Xiang and ask her opinion. I was very surprised when Sister Xiang was able to directly point out the key issue. It shocked me, and I thought, “You found the issue I couldn’t find, so what will Brother Wang think of me now?” I was a little unhappy about what happened, but then, Sister Xiang asked me what I thought of the problem. In order to preserve my image, I lied, saying, “You’re right, that’s exactly what I thought too.” Then, Sister Xiang immediately proposed a solution. I thought it was a good idea, but I was still unhappy about it. I thought, “You noticed the problem, and now you’ve already proposed a revision. Doesn’t this make me look worse than you? How will my brothers and sisters see me now? How is my image meant to survive this? This won’t do. I have to think of an even better solution. I can’t let my brothers and sisters look down on me.” So, I carefully scrutinized Sister Xiang’s plan and I found that although her plan was valid, there were still some oversights. So, I said, “Sister, I thought about your solution before. There’s nothing new in it, and it will require too many changes….” Before long, I had completely discredited Sister Xiang’s proposal. At the time, Sister Xiang felt something was wrong, so she asked me in a confused tone, “Why do I feel like you always deny my suggestions, rather than trying to solve the problem?” I immediately tried to justify myself. I said, “I’m not. I just think there is something wrong with your plan, I’m not rejecting your advice.” After that, I suggested a new solution, Brother Wang felt my plan was good, and he finally used my plan. When I saw this, I was as happy as if I had won a battle in a war. I felt that now, my brothers and sisters would know I was better than the supervisor. The next day, Sister Xiang opened up about her state. She said that the work was difficult, and she didn’t know what to do. She also said to me, “In the time I’ve been partnered with you in our duty, I feel I can’t do any work at all, and I feel like I can’t help your group professionally. I feel like I am worth nothing while I’m around you. I don’t have this feeling when I’m around other brothers and sisters.” She also pointed out my problem, saying, “Through my contact with you, I’ve found that you show off in everything you do. You aren’t offering supplements or improvements to others’ ideas, and you don’t genuinely want to help and support people in entry into principles. Instead, you deny others and show yourself off, as if others are worthless and always worse than you. It makes others feel constrained, as if everything they do is wrong. If this continues you will end up holding power in the group. You are walking the path of an antichrist!” At the time, another sister also said I had these manifestations. But none of it sunk in at the moment. I didn’t outwardly try to justify myself, but inside I felt deeply aggrieved. I thought, “I’m walking the antichrist’s path? I constrain my brothers and sisters? Aren’t you just targeting me? What will my brothers and sisters think of me?” After that, Brother Wang’s finished work based on my suggested plan was selected for use, so I felt even more defiant and thought, “Do you still think I walk the path of the antichrist and constrain people? If that was true, would I be able to produce finished works?” Because I always refused to accept her advice, Sister Xiang seldom gave it after that.

Not long afterward, Brother Wang created a proposal, and it looked reasonable to me, but there were also some problems with it. I thought, “If we do things according to his plan, I will have to make modifications and additions. That would make me look incompetent. This won’t do. I have to think of a better and more innovative proposal, so that he can see my competence. Later, when we give it to the supervisor, it will make me look even better.” So, I set Brother Wang’s idea aside and came up with a new plan. When Brother Wang heard the news, he couldn’t understand. I said to him, “If we did things by your proposal, there would be too many problems….” When Brother Wang saw there were so many problems in his proposal, he was at a loss. He also felt he was bad at his work and became negative. At the time, I thought, “Since you won’t take my advice, you can find a way to solve problems on your own.” So, after that, I went to work on my own tasks. But during that time, I felt like my train of thinking wasn’t very clear, and I wasn’t very effective in my duty. For a long time, our group didn’t produce any finished works. Later, Sister Xiang came to investigate our problems and deviations. Brother Wang said, “I made a proposal, but Brother Li said there were too many problems with it to use, so I gave it up. Later, Brother Li gave me a proposal, but there’s some material I can’t find for it, and my limited skills aren’t up to the task.” Then, Sister Xiang asked Brother Wang if he felt constrained by me. When I heard Sister Xiang ask this question, I thought, “What does it have to do with me if he can’t make the finished product? I told him and he can’t do it. Is that my problem? Why are you targeting me? A while ago, you exposed me by saying I had antichrist behavior. Now, Brother Wang can’t do his work, and you’re calling it my problem again. Is it just because you don’t like me? Is it my responsibility that the work is ineffective? I can’t let this go. I have to talk about your problems too. Then you might stop accusing and embarrassing me.” After Sister Xiang left, I told Brother Wang, “Lately, I’ve noticed that Sister Xiang doesn’t do practical work. She also doesn’t offer any useful professional advice. We need to remind her so she can reflect. Otherwise, it could be harmful to our work.” After he heard me say that, Brother Wang had a bias against Sister Xiang too. Later, another supervisor, Sister Zheng, came to our group, and I told her all of my views on Sister Xiang. I told her that Sister Xiang wasn’t serious about work, that the group hadn’t made a finished video in a long time, but she didn’t solve practical problems, etc. After Sister Zheng heard this, she asked me if I had any opinions about Sister Xiang. I quickly thought of an artful answer, “No, I don’t have any particular opinions.” But after I said that, I suddenly felt panic, and spiritually, I felt especially dark and depressed. I didn’t sleep well that night. I felt I had done evil and that I was forsaken by God. I was gripped by a sense of guilt. I clearly had a bias against Sister Xiang, but I said the opposite. Wasn’t this a lie? I was also responsible for the state of work, but I deliberately drew Brother Wang into accusing Sister Xiang and baselessly judging her. Wasn’t I just attacking her to take revenge? I saw that I was really doing evil.

After that, our leader saw I had attacked Brother Wang and the supervisors such that they were negative, which seriously affected the video work, and that I had never accepted reminders or help, and I had even struck out at Sister Xiang. Based on my behavior, I was dismissed. After I was dismissed, I couldn’t feel God’s presence, and I lived in darkness. I prayed to God many times, saying, “God! My brothers and sisters exposed me for walking the path of the antichrist, but I still have no genuine knowledge of myself. I don’t know where I went wrong. God, please enlighten and guide me so that I can know myself.” After I prayed, I found a passage of God’s word in which God revealed antichrists. God said, “The methods of antichrists are always unconventional and high-sounding when they do things. No matter how correct another’s suggestion may be, they will always reject it. Even if another person’s suggestion is consistent with their ideas, if the antichrist doesn’t propose it first, they will definitely refuse to accept or implement it. Instead, the antichrist will do their utmost to belittle, deny, and condemn the suggestion until the person who offered it feels their idea is wrong and admits it. Only then does the antichrist stop. Antichrists like to build themselves up and belittle others so that others worship them and put them at the center of things. Antichrists allow only themselves to blossom, and for others to only ever serve as the backdrop that allows them to stand out. Antichrists believe that everything they say and do is right, while everything others say and do is wrong. They often put forward novel viewpoints to deny other people’s views and practices, they nitpick and find problems with other people’s opinions, and they disrupt or reject other people’s plans, so that everyone is made to listen to them and act according to their methods. They use these methods and means to continually deny you, attack you, and make you feel you are not good enough, so that you increasingly become submissive to them, look up to them, and admire them, until finally you are completely under their control. This is the process by which antichrists subdue and control people” (“Item Five: They Deceive, Draw In, Threaten, and Control People” in Exposing Antichrists). From God’s word, I saw that antichrists are always unconventional, always show themselves off, and always deny and belittle others to achieve their goal of standing out from the crowd and making people look up to them. As time goes on, those who cooperate with them sink into a negative state, feel they are inferior to the antichrists, always obey them, and finally feel controlled by them. Wasn’t my behavior the same as an antichrist? From the bottom of my heart, I despised and looked down on the previous two supervisors. When they saw some problems with the video I made, I feared others wouldn’t think highly of me, so I looked for various reasons to reject their suggestions. As a result, the supervisors felt constrained by me. Even when Sister Xiang, who understood professional skills, identified key problems in our work, and gave reasonable advice on revisions, it was unacceptable to me. I felt that if I listened to her, no one would notice me, and others wouldn’t think highly of me, so I deliberately found shortcomings in her plan in an effort to belittle and discredit it. Then I put forward my “brilliant idea,” and we did things my way. Outwardly, I operated under the banner of improving our work, but my real purpose was to prove I was better than the supervisor so that others would look up to me. When discussing Brother Wang’s proposal with him, to show off, I dismissed his plan as completely worthless, which made him passive and unable to make finished works. The church arranged for me to cooperate with my brothers and sisters in my duty so that we could learn from each other’s strengths. If someone’s proposal was good and reasonable, we were meant to offer refinements to the proposal, so that everyone can offer their best, and everyone could succeed in their own way, which would be most beneficial for video work. But to make people admire and support me, I always offered unconventional ideas, showed off, denied and belittled others, and never let others play a role in their duties, which caused my partner and the supervisors to feel they were useless, to sink into negativity, and to be unable to do their duties. Wasn’t the essence of what I did deliberately suppressing people? I always showed myself off and suppressed others, and made people feel they couldn’t do without me and had to listen to me in everything, so that my partner and supervisors weren’t involved in the group’s work. Wasn’t I establishing an independent kingdom? Without being dismissed, I would never have realized my problem. I was honestly too numb!

Later, I read another passage of God’s word. “The antichrists’ cherishment of their status and prestige goes beyond that of normal people, and is something within their disposition and essence; it is not a temporary interest, or the transient effect of their surroundings—it is something within their life, their bones, and so it is their essence. This is to say that in everything an antichrist does, their first consideration is their own status and prestige, nothing else. For an antichrist, status and prestige are their life, and their lifelong goal. In all they do, their first consideration is: ‘What will happen to my status? And to my prestige? Will doing this give me prestige? Will it elevate my status in people’s minds?’ That is the first thing they think about, which is ample proof that they have the disposition and essence of antichrists; they would not consider these problems otherwise. … They often deliberate such things in their hearts, they deliberate how they can carve a place out for themselves in the house of God, how they can have a lofty reputation in the church, so that people listen when they talk, and support them when they act, and follow them wherever they go; so that they have a voice in the church, a reputation, so that they enjoy benefits, and have status—they often ponder such things. These are what such people pursue. Why are they always thinking about such things? After reading the words of God, after hearing sermons, do they really not understand all this, are they really not able to discern all this? Are the words of God and the truth really not able to change their notions, ideas, and opinions? That is not the case at all. The problem starts with them, it is wholly because they do not love the truth, because, in their hearts, they are sick of the truth, and as a result, they are utterly unreceptive to the truth—which is determined by their nature and essence” (“Item Nine: They Do Their Duty Only to Distinguish Themselves and Feed Their Own Interests and Ambitions; They Never Consider the Interests of God’s House, and Even Sell Those Interests Out in Exchange for Personal Glory (Part Three)” in Exposing Antichrists). From God’s word, I saw that antichrists especially treasure their reputation and status. They love being admired, supported, and having a place in others’ hearts. When things happen, their first consideration is their own reputation and status. They don’t consider the work of God’s house or the feelings of their brothers and sisters, nor do they think of how God sees them and what consequences will occur if they continue. Looking at the behaviors of antichrists, I realized that I was really in danger. I had been making videos for a long time, I had some experience and some accomplishments, and I had gained the admiration of my brothers, sisters, and supervisors, so I felt I was superior to others, and I enjoyed the feeling of being looked up to and supported. When the supervisors pointed out the problems in our work, or made a suitable proposal, I felt a sense of crisis. I feared I would lose the admiration of others, and thus lose my sense of presence in the group, so to protect my reputation and status, I belittled my brothers and sisters, rejected their suggestions and proposals, and then put forward my own “brilliant ideas” to show off. I didn’t consider the feelings of my brothers and sisters, how to cultivate people, or how to benefit the work of the church. All that mattered was that I could show off my talent. Sister Xiang saw that I was walking the wrong path, so she pointed out my problem to remind and help me, but I not only refused to reflect on myself, I felt that my reputation and status have been greatly damaged, and I developed hostility and even hatred toward my sister. To preserve my reputation and status, I seized on Sister Xiang’s problems and judged her behind her back. I also deceived and drew in Brother Wang, so that he had a prejudice against Sister Xiang. I even judged and attacked Sister Xiang under the banner of helping her. I saw that to maintain my reputation and status, I was capable of anything. I was so despicable and vicious! This was the path of the antichrist! If this continued, even if I temporarily gained the admiration of my brothers and sisters, what good would it do to me? I would end up doing many evil deeds before God, I would completely lose the chance to gain the truth and be saved, and in the end, I could only be condemned and punished by God. I was just like Paul. He always sought to be looked up to and admired, and he always spoke lofty and empty words and doctrine to show off. In his letters, he belittled Peter and exalted himself, brought everyone before him, and he was shameless enough to say he lived as Christ, which made people treat him as God. In the end, he offended God’s disposition and was cursed and punished by God. Wasn’t I just walking Paul’s mistaken path? When I realized this, I couldn’t help but be afraid. I thought again of how I did evil to protect my reputation and status. After I formed a clique to judge and attack Sister Xiang, I immediately felt dark and uneasy, and there was always a sense that disaster was about to happen. Wasn’t what I did an offense to God’s disposition? If I still refused to repent, God would definitely reject me and cast me out! At this moment, I realized how harmful my pursuit of reputation and status was!

After that, I read in God’s word, “If someone says they love the truth and that they pursue the truth, but in essence, the goal they pursue is to distinguish themselves, to show off, to make people think highly of them, to achieve their own interests, and the performing of their duty is not to obey or satisfy God, and instead is to achieve prestige and status, then their pursuit is illegitimate. That being the case, when it comes to the work of the church, are their actions an obstacle, or do they help move it forward? They are clearly an obstacle; they do not move it forward. All who wave the banner of doing the work of the church yet pursue their own personal prestige and status, run their own operation, create their own little group, their own little kingdom—is this kind of person performing their duty? All the work they do essentially interrupts, disrupts, and impairs the work of the church. What is the consequence of their pursuit of status and prestige? First, this affects how God’s chosen people eat and drink God’s word and understand the truth, it hinders their life entry, it stops them from entering the right track of faith in God, and leads them onto the wrong path—which harms the chosen ones, and brings them to ruin. And what does it ultimately do to the work of the church? It is dismantlement, interruption and impairment. This is the consequence brought about by people’s pursuit of fame and status. When they perform their duty in this way, can this not be defined as walking the path of an antichrist? When God asks that people put aside status and prestige, it is not that He is depriving people of the right to choose; rather, it is because, while pursuing status and prestige, people harm the work of the church, they interrupt the brothers’ and sisters’ entry into life, and even have an influence on others eating and drinking God’s words normally and understanding the truth, and thus achieving God’s salvation. What’s even more serious is that, when people pursue their own prestige and status, such behavior and actions can be characterized as cooperating with Satan in harming and obstructing, to the utmost extent, the normal progress of God’s work, and stopping God’s will from being normally carried out among His chosen people. They are deliberately opposing and arguing the toss with God. This is the nature of people’s pursuit of status and prestige. The problem with people pursuing their own interests is that the goals they pursue are the goals of Satan—they are goals that are wicked and unjust. When people pursue personal interests such as prestige and status, they unwittingly become a tool of Satan, they become a channel for Satan, and, moreover, they become an embodiment of Satan. They play a negative role in the church; toward the work of the church, and toward the normal church life and normal pursuit of God’s chosen people, the effect they have is to disturb and impair; they have a negative effect” (“Item Nine: They Do Their Duty Only to Distinguish Themselves and Feed Their Own Interests and Ambitions; They Never Consider the Interests of God’s House, and Even Sell Those Interests Out in Exchange for Personal Glory (Part One)” in Exposing Antichrists). From God’s word, I saw clearly that pursuing reputation, status, and admiration was walking a path of wickedness. When the supervisors just started, they had to follow up on the work of several groups, and needed to learn and master the principles and skills of various duties. Faced with these difficulties, they can actively study, discover problems, and make suggestions, which is a good thing, and beneficial for church work. To protect my own reputation and status, I not only didn’t support them and cooperate with their work, so we could seek the truth together and do our duties well, I deliberately denied and belittled their suggestions, and attacked them until they became negative, withdrew, didn’t dare give me advice, and even felt they couldn’t serve as supervisors. Also, Brother Wang had just started in his duty, so he needed more support and help, but as a means to show off, I didn’t help my brother by offering improvements to his proposal. Instead, I rejected his plan as worthless, which caused him to feel constrained, negative, and at a loss about what to do. I saw that everything I did was destructive and ruinous. I attacked others until they were negative and didn’t want to cooperate with the work of God’s house, which made it impossible for church work to proceed. Wasn’t that exactly what Satan wants? Only then did I see that my pursuit of reputation and status was based on harming the interests of God’s house.

During that time, through spiritual reflection, I saw how my pursuit of reputation and status did nothing but damage the work of the church and cause harm to my brothers and sisters. I felt very negative over this. “I exposed an antichrist’s disposition, so didn’t that make me an authentic antichrist? I am so corrupt that I certainly can’t be saved. Has my path of belief in God come to an end?” In my pain, I prayed to God, “God! To make people look up to me, I did evil things and disturbed the work of God’s house. I see that I was walking the wrong path, I feel very negative, and I feel that I can’t be saved. God! Please lead and guide me so that I can escape my negative state.” After I prayed, I read a passage of God’s words. God says, “You must be able to clearly perceive and identify the antichrists. You must be able to distinguish their various manifestations, and at the same time as distinguishing these things, you should also be clear about how many areas of your nature and essence are the same as the antichrists’, because you are both the kinds of people that have been corrupted by Satan; but whereas the antichrists are worn by Satan as its garb, and have become an outlet for Satan, you are that type of person that has been corrupted by Satan, and still has hope of salvation. … So with what mindset should you accept these facts and manifestations? You should apply them to yourself, and acknowledge that you have the nature and essence of an antichrist, and then you should reflect on which of what is manifested and revealed in you is no different from what is manifested and revealed in the antichrists. First acknowledge these facts; do not put on a pretense or try to camouflage yourself. The path you walk is the path of the antichrists. It would not be at odds with the facts to say that you are an antichrist; it is merely that the house of God has yet to name you as such, and still gives you a chance to repent. Do you understand? First accept and acknowledge, and then come before God and be disciplined and bound; do not leave the light of God’s presence and His protection. In this way, when you act, you will, on the one hand, be bound by conscience and sense, and will additionally be illuminated and led by God’s words, which will also bind you; on the other hand, the Holy Spirit will also guide you, and arrange for the people, matters, and objects around you to prompt you, and discipline you. How will God prompt you? God works in many ways. Sometimes God gives you a clear feeling in your heart, and you have a clear sense that you must accept stricture, and not be wayward, and that when you make mistakes, you bring shame upon God, and embarrass yourself before others, and so you rein yourself in. And does this not protect you? This is one of the ways in which God works. Sometimes, God will reprimand you from within: He will provide you with clear words, you will be told that to act thus is shameful and despicable to God, and will bring curses and damnation; there will be clear words that reprimand you, which you will know apply to you. And what is the aim of reprimanding you in this way? To give you a feeling in your conscience: when you have this feeling, you will be mindful of impact, consequences, and your own shamefulness, and will rein in your actions and behavior. After much experiencing in this way, you will discover that though these corrupt dispositions may be rooted within people, when people can accept the truth and clearly see corrupt dispositions for what they are, they can then consciously forsake the flesh. When people can put the truth into practice, their satanic dispositions can be cleansed and changed. Man’s satanic disposition is not indestructible or immutable; when you accept the truth and can put it into practice, your satanic disposition will naturally be broken down and replaced” (“Item Four: They Exalt and Testify About Themselves” in Exposing Antichrists). God’s words gave me great comfort, and I was very moved. I thought, since I was so corrupt, God would certainly hate me and not save me, but from God’s words, I felt God’s understanding and mercy. I also understood that those who truly have an antichrist’s essence never develop genuine repentance. If you can realize you are walking the path of an antichrist and truly repent, you can be saved. I also learned that whether a person can be saved depends on the path they take. God’s word pointed out the path of practice to me. As long as we admit our corruption, don’t pretend or disguise ourselves, consciously open up to our brothers and sisters to expose ourselves, and rely on God and forsake ourselves when we want to pursue reputation and status, God will guide us and help us cast off our corrupt dispositions. In God’s word, I saw the hope of changing my disposition. I could still change! I felt I had faith in God again. I also felt God’s love practically: When I did the evil to preserve my reputation and status, God arranged for my brothers and sisters to prune and deal with me, and used His words to lead and guide me in knowing myself, clearly showing me my evil deeds and the wrong path I had taken, so that I could repent. All of this was God’s love and salvation. I felt as if God was teaching me face to face, like a strict father or a loving mother. God’s salvation was so real! Once I understood God’s will, I no longer wanted to pursue reputation and status. I only wanted to pursue a change in my disposition, and not disappoint God’s hopes for me. After that, I wrote a letter to Sister Xiang, in which I opened up to her about my intentions at the time and apologized to her. Then, after the supervisor noticed I had reflected and changed a little, I was asked to continue making videos.

After this experience of failure, I often reminded myself not to do things as I used to, and I was very afraid I would pursue reputation and status or try to show off and do evil that would cause a disruption. But when things actually happened, I still found it difficult to put myself aside, and I could only practice after struggling with myself. I remember once, Brother Wang made a video. I thought his proposal was reasonable, but there were still many problems. At the time, I thought, “If only I could come up with a better proposal, once it is finished, I will receive most of the credit, and the supervisor will know I have the better ideas.” So, I directly rejected Brother Wang’s proposal and put forward a novel new idea. When Brother Wang heard that, he didn’t know what to do and he was at a loss. He didn’t dare to continue with his own proposal, but he also wasn’t sure whether my proposal would work, so he got stuck where he was. It was all very frustrating for me. I thought, “I’m the group leader. Why won’t you listen to me?” I wanted to give him even more reasons for rejecting his proposal. But at that moment, I started to feel very uneasy. I was making the same old mistake, wasn’t I? This was exactly what I did before. To show myself off, I always rejected others, which disturbed church work. I felt that God was watching me, and I knew God’s righteous disposition must not be offended. I felt a little afraid, so I quickly prayed to God and asked Him to curse me. I said, “God! My corrupt disposition is too serious. I always involuntarily deny others and show off to make others admire me. God! Please curse my corrupt disposition, and guide me on the path of pursuing truth.” After I prayed, I read a passage of God’s word. God says, “If you insist on taking the path of the antichrists, and follow it all the way to the end, and still don’t think this is a problem, and are unwilling to repent, and stubbornly continue to act in the same way, competing with the leaders and workers for prominence and profit, trying to be more exceptional than everyone else, different from everyone else, better than everyone else no matter who you’re with, then this is trouble: If you stubbornly pursue prestige and status, and refuse to repent, you are an antichrist, and you are destined to be punished. The words of God, the truth, conscience and sense—if none of these do anything in you, then you are bound to end up the same as an antichrist, you are beyond salvation, beyond deliverance! Whether or not people can be saved, and whether or not they can walk the path of fearing God and shunning evil, depends on whether true repentance is expressed in them once they have come to know themselves, and upon their attitude toward the truth, and just what path they choose. If you do not abandon the path of the antichrists, but choose to satisfy your own ambitions and desires, and openly defy the truth and resist God, then you are beyond remedy” (“Item Four: They Exalt and Testify About Themselves” in Exposing Antichrists). God’s words are very clear. Whether God saves you depends on whether you can truly repent after you know yourself. My corruption was deep, and I always exposed my satanic disposition, so it depended on whether I could betray my incorrect intentions and practice the truth. I thought, “I can no longer speak and act from my corrupt disposition. I must do the opposite, let go of my image and status, and fulfill my duty in a down-to-earth manner. Since Brother Wang’s proposal was reasonable, I shouldn’t have rejected it outright. I should have offered improvements and refinements to it, and done my best to turn it into a finished product. This was the reason I should have and the duty I should perform. This was also what God wanted to see.” When I recognized this, I no longer rejected Brother Wang’s proposal. Instead, I pointed out the problems in his proposal, and told him the suggestions I thought would help. He had a path after I spoke, and he happily accepted my suggestions and used them. After practicing that way, I felt especially at peace and secure. Later, when similar things happened, although I still exposed such things, I could consciously pray to God, forsake myself, and listen to reasonable advice from my brothers and sisters. Slowly, I discovered that every brother and sister has some strengths. I can also see some value in others’ proposals, and I offer advice for improvement based on these proposals. I also encourage my brothers and sisters to do things their own way. By cooperating like this, my brothers and sisters feel more relaxed and at ease, and I also feel much more secure. Thank God!

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