229 Cherish the Last Moments

1 In just the blink of an eye, I hardly realized I’ve had faith in God all these years. Seeing that His work is about to come to a close, I reflect on whether I’ve gained the truth and the life. I’m at a loss, I don’t know how I can give an account to God. So many times reading God’s words, I’ve gone through the motions without careful pondering. So many times after being pruned and dealt with, I haven’t sought the truth. So many years of sacrifice and expending myself, I thought I was faithful to God. Carefully dissecting my motives, it’s all been seeking name and status. God’s uttered so many words, but I’ve hardly understood any truths. I’ve faced so many trials, so much refinement, but my disposition has not changed. Now that God is about to depart, my numb heart is suddenly awake. I have lost so many chances at perfection from not pursuing the truth.

2 God is going to go back to Zion, the great disaster will befall. God still frets over our immaturity in life. He earnestly exhorts us to waste no time pursuing the truth. Time after time, judgment and chastisement awaken my numb heart. I shed tears seeing all of God’s heartfelt words. To save mankind God has paid such a great price. If I truly had reason and conscience how could I rebel again and wound God? If I still don’t pursue the truth, I would be lacking humanity, being unworthy of living. God’s disposition is righteous and holy and will not tolerate mankind’s offenses. Unless my corrupt dispositions are cleansed and changed, how can I be saved? I’m left with so many regrets from things past, my heart is filled with remorse. I’ll cherish the last moments, pursue the truth to live out a human likeness and satisfy God.

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