By Wu Fan, China

One day in December of 2013, a sister gave me a call and said that my son had been taken away by the police. When I heard the news, I froze, thinking, “My son hasn’t believed in God for long and lacks a foundation. He only just quit his job and started doing his duty, how can he be arrested already?” I thought back to when I was arrested in the past. The police used all sorts of means to torment me in order to force me to sell out the church’s leaders and money, to the point that I felt I’d be better off dead. Each of those police officers is cruel and ruthless; they are devils! They have a deep hatred for believers in God; they can beat us to death with impunity. I worried, thinking, “My son is still young and has never experienced that kind of suffering! If he can’t handle the torture and becomes a Judas, his chance of being saved will be utterly lost!” Thinking of this made me worried sick. For the next few days, I couldn’t eat, and I didn’t sleep well. It was like a knife was piercing my heart; I only wished I could suffer in my son’s place. I prayed to God constantly, asking Him to look after and protect my son. I also harbored complaints in my heart, thinking, “My son left home to do his duty after believing in God for a short time; why didn’t God look after him and protect him? If the police badly injure him, how will he get by in the future? And if they beat him to death, I’ll never get to see him again.” The more I thought about it, the more upset I got, and my heart sank into darkness. I was unable to calm myself down when eating and drinking God’s words, and inside, I even blamed the leaders and workers for not putting someone in charge of maintaining a safe environment and causing my son to be arrested. At the time, I was a gospel deacon in the church, and I was quite busy, but I didn’t have the headspace to keep my mind on the work; all I could think of was my son.

In the midst of pain and helplessness, I prayed to God nonstop, asking Him to look after and protect my son so that he wouldn’t become a Judas and sell out the brothers and sisters. After praying, I thought of God’s words: “In everything that happens to you, whether it be good or bad, it should bring you benefit, and should not make you negative. Regardless, you should be able to consider things while standing on the side of God, and not analyze or study them from the perspective of man (this would be a deviation in your experience)” (The Word, Vol. 1. The Appearance and Work of God. Promises to Those Who Are Perfected). The things that happen to us every day, whether good or bad, are all laid out by God and all contain God’s intentions within them. When it came to my son’s arrest, I was looking at it from a fleshly perspective of not wanting him to suffer. Therefore, I felt that his arrest was a bad thing and even blamed God for not protecting him. I thought of Job’s experience: When Job lost his wealth and property and his children met disaster, his wife ridiculed him and wanted him to abandon God, but Job rebuked his wife, saying, “You speak as one of the foolish women speaks. … Shall we receive good at the hand of God, and shall we not receive adversity?” (Job 2:10). Job had a God-fearing heart; whether he received good or adversity, he could always accept it from God, without complaining or sinning with his lips, and offending Him, and he was able to submit to God and extol His holy name. By contrast, when I’d heard the news that my son was arrested and not that his life was in danger, I began to lodge complaints and even let it affect my duty. My name didn’t even belong in the same sentence as Job’s; I was so humiliated! I prayed to God, “God! My son was arrested when doing his duty, and I don’t know how he’s doing right now. I’m afraid that he’ll become a Judas and be punished in the future. God! My heart is in pain, and my state is disturbed when I do my duty. Please guide me to reflect and understand my problem.” After praying, I read God’s words. “I do not give people the opportunity to express their feelings, for I am without fleshly feelings, and have grown to detest the feelings of people to an extreme degree. It is because of the feelings between people that I have been cast to one side, and thus I have become an ‘other’ in their eyes; it is because of the feelings between people that I have been forgotten; it is because of the feelings of man that he seizes the opportunity to pick up his ‘conscience’; it is because of the feelings of man that he is always averse to My chastisement; it is because of the feelings of man that he calls Me unfair and unjust, and says that I am heedless of man’s feelings in My handling of things. Do I also have kin upon earth? Who has ever, like Me, worked day and night, without thought for food or sleep, for the sake of My entire management plan? How could man be comparable to God? How could man be compatible with God?” (The Word, Vol. 1. The Appearance and Work of God. God’s Words to the Entire Universe, Chapter 28). “Mankind all live in a state of feelings, and so God does not avoid a single one of them, and exposes the secrets hidden in the hearts of all mankind. Why is it so hard for people to separate themselves from their feelings? Does doing so surpass the standards of conscience? Can conscience fulfill God’s will? Can feelings help people through adversity? In God’s eyes, feelings are His enemy—has this not been clearly stated in God’s words?” (The Word, Vol. 1. The Appearance and Work of God. Interpretations of the Mysteries of “God’s Words to the Entire Universe”, Chapter 28). From God’s words, I saw that God detests it when people live according to their feelings. When people act according to feelings, they’re only thinking of the familial attachments and interests of the flesh, not seeking the truth or seeking God’s intention at all; they are resisting God in everything they do. That’s exactly how I was. When I found out my son had been arrested, my first thought was that the police were certainly going to beat him and force him to deny God and sell out the church’s leaders and workers. I thought that if my son couldn’t bear the torture and became a Judas, he would lose his chance to attain salvation, and not only would he be unable to gain blessings in the future, he’d also be punished in hell. Since my son was still young, I also wondered how he would survive in the future if the beatings left him handicapped. And if he was beaten to death, I’d have lost my son forever. Thinking of these severe consequences, complaints toward God arose in my heart, and I blamed God for not looking after and protecting my son, even reasoning and clamoring with Him. Where was my reason? Where was my humanity? Seeing that people who lived by their feelings could resist God at any time or in any place, it made sense why God exposed to us that “feelings are His enemy.”

During my seeking, I read more of God’s words. “The path God guides us along does not go straight up, but is a winding road full of potholes; God says, furthermore, that the rockier the path is, the more it can reveal our loving hearts. Yet none of us can open up such a path. In My experience, I have walked many rocky, treacherous paths and I have endured great suffering; at times I have even been so utterly grief-stricken that I wanted to cry out, but I have walked this path to this day. I believe that this is the path led by God, so I endure the torment of all the suffering and continue onward. For this is what God has ordained, so who can escape it? I do not ask to receive any blessings; all I ask is that I am able to walk the path I ought to walk according to God’s intentions. I do not seek to imitate others, walking the path that they walk; all I seek is that I may fulfill My devotion to walk My designated path until the end. I do not ask for the help of others; to be frank, I cannot help anyone else, either. It seems that I am terribly sensitive on this matter. I do not know what other people think. This is because I have always believed that the amount an individual must suffer and the distance they must walk on their path is ordained by God, and that no one can really help anyone else” (The Word, Vol. 1. The Appearance and Work of God. The Path … (6)). From God’s words, I understood that how much suffering one endures and what circumstances they experience in their lifetime was all ordained by God long ago. I ought to hand my son over to God and submit to His sovereignty and arrangements. This was the reason and practice I ought to have. My son hadn’t believed in God for long, and he wasn’t discerning when it came to the great red dragon’s essence of hating God and the truth. That he had now been arrested and would endure suffering; this had God’s goodwill inside it, and even more so, it had lessons that my son ought to learn. I thought of how many brothers and sisters had been arrested and persecuted by the great red dragon, and they all suffered a lot, but these experiences gave them true faith in God. In the midst of pain and adversity, they were willing to rot forever in prison rather than betray God, triumphing over their flesh and over Satan and ultimately giving a beautiful and resounding testimony to God. I also thought of my own experience with being arrested. Although my flesh had suffered a bit back then, and although I was timid and weak when experiencing torture and torment, when I prayed to God and was guided and led by His words, my faith in Him also grew. Through this experience, not only did I learn to discern the great red dragon’s wicked essence of resisting God, I also gained some understanding of God’s almightiness and sovereignty. With this understanding, I was willing to hand my son over to God and let God orchestrate and arrange everything.

One month later, my son returned, his face sallow and his spirits low. My son’s stature was small, and he didn’t dare admit that he believed in Almighty God, so they let him go in the end. After experiencing this failure, my son learned some lessons and became more discerning toward the great red dragon. He also saw that his stature was small and that his faith in God was not at all genuine. Six months later, he resumed his duty.

One day in October of 2023, I received a letter from the church saying that my son had been arrested yet again. More than 30 people had been arrested from my son’s church, leaders and workers among them. I thought of how my son already had an arrest record, and how if the police found out he had done leadership duties, they would definitely force him to sell out the church’s money and the leaders and workers, and to sign a document renouncing his faith. Now was the time in which God was revealing people and sorting them according to their kind; if my son was brainwashed by the Communist Party, or if he couldn’t stand the torture and renounced his faith and betrayed God, he’d be opening the door to hell and losing his chance to be saved. Thinking of this, I felt as though something was stuck in the pit of my stomach, and I became anxious about my son’s future prospects and fate and was in no mind to do my duty. In my heart, I was praying for my son constantly, asking God to show mercy to and protect my son so that he could get through this difficult time safely. A few brothers and sisters saw that I was in a downcast mood, heaving sighs of despair all day long, and they fellowshipped with me about God’s intention while also finding many of His words to help me. I realized that I had once again been constrained by my feelings, and so I prayed to God: “God! My son has been taken away by the police again. I can’t let it go and I’m fearing for his life; please guide me to seek the truth and not be constrained in this matter.”

Later on, I recalled God’s fellowship on letting go of one’s expectations for their children, and I found those words and read them. Almighty God says: “Having understood the attitude parents should have toward their adult children, should parents also let go of their expectations for their adult children? Some ignorant parents cannot comprehend life or destiny, do not recognize God’s sovereignty, and tend to do ignorant things when it comes to their children. For example, after their children become independent, they may encounter certain special situations, hardships, or major incidents; some face illnesses, some get involved in lawsuits, some get divorced, some are deceived and scammed, and some are kidnapped, harmed, severely beaten, or face death. There are even some who fall into drug abuse, and so on. What should parents do in these special and significant situations? What is the typical reaction of most parents? Do they do what they ought to do as created beings with the identity of parents? Very seldom do parents hear such news and react as they would if it had happened to a stranger. A majority of parents stay up all night till their hair turns gray, they lose sleep night after night, have no appetite during the day, rack their brains with thinking, and some even weep bitterly, till their eyes turn red and their tears run dry. They pray fervently to God, for God to take their own faith into account and protect their children, show them favor and bless them, show mercy, and spare their lives. As parents in such a situation, their human weaknesses, vulnerabilities, and feelings toward their children are all exposed. What else is revealed? Their rebelliousness against God. They implore God and pray to Him, beseeching Him to keep their children from calamity. Even if a disaster occurs, they pray that their children won’t die, that they can escape danger, they won’t be harmed by evil people, their illnesses won’t grow more severe but will improve, and so on. What are they really praying for? (God, with these prayers they are making demands of God, with an undertone of complaint.) In one respect, they are extremely dissatisfied with their children’s plight, complaining that God shouldn’t have allowed such things to happen to their children. Their dissatisfaction is mixed with complaint, and they ask God to change His mind, not to act like this, to deliver their children from danger, to keep them safe, to heal their sickness, to help them escape lawsuits, to avert calamity when it arises, and so on—in short, to make everything go smoothly. By praying like this, in one respect, they are complaining to God, and in another, they are making demands of Him. Isn’t this a manifestation of rebelliousness? (It is.) Implicitly, they are saying that what God is doing is not right or good, that He shouldn’t act like this. Because these are their children, and they are believers, they think God shouldn’t let such things happen to their children. Their children are different from others; they should receive preferential blessings from God. On account of their faith in God, He ought to bless their children, and if He does not, they become distressed, they cry, throw a tantrum, and no longer want to follow God. If their child dies, they feel that they can’t go on living either. Is that the sentiment they have in mind? (Yes.) Isn’t this a form of protest against God? (It is.) This is protesting against God. … When God orchestrates or rules someone else’s fate, you think it’s fine as long as it has nothing to do with you. But you think He shouldn’t be able to rule the fate of your children? In the eyes of God, all humanity is under God’s sovereignty, and no one can escape the sovereignty and arrangements set by God’s hands. Why should your children be an exception? God’s sovereignty is ordained and planned out by Him. Is it okay for you to want to change it? (No, it isn’t.) It isn’t okay. Therefore, people must not do foolish or unreasonable things. Whatever God does is based on causes and effects from previous lives—what does it have to do with you? If you resist God’s sovereignty, you’re looking for death. If you don’t want your children to experience these things, that stems from affection, not justice, mercy, or kindness—it is merely due to the effect of your affection. … The relationship that truly exists between people is not based on ties of flesh and blood, but it is a relationship between one living being and another created by God. This kind of relationship carries no ties of flesh and blood; it is only between two independent living beings. If you think about it from this angle, then as parents, when your children are unfortunate enough to fall sick or their lives are in danger, you ought to face these matters correctly. You should not give up the time you have left, the path you ought to take, or the responsibilities and obligations you should fulfill, because of your children’s misfortunes or passing—you should face this matter correctly. If you have the right thoughts and viewpoints and can see through these things, then you will be able to quickly overcome despair, grief, and longing” (The Word, Vol. 6. On the Pursuit of the Truth I. How to Pursue the Truth (19)). Reading God’s words, I understood that originally, people are independent living beings with no relations to each other. Only once the soul is reincarnated and enters this material world do people have families, husbands and wives, fathers and sons, mothers and daughters, and other such relationships. But when speaking in regard to a person’s essence, there are no relations between one another originally. But people cannot see such matters clearly, putting fleshly familial attachments and blood relations above everything. When their children are faced with misfortune and illness or their children’s lives are endangered, parents live inside their feelings, and are in such pain that they even wish they were dead. In reality, which path people take and what suffering they endure in their lifetimes were ordained by God long ago and are not for parents to determine. Take my neighbors, for instance. This married couple lived frugally their whole lives, spending all their hard-earned money on their daughter. They sent her to an elite school and gave her the best education, hoping that she could have a stable job and financial security in the future. However, their daughter did not follow the correct path and began taking drugs at a young age. In the end, she was arrested for drug trafficking and sentenced to 13 years in prison. Her parents practically lost their minds. I also thought of a young sister whose parents had been working away from home for many years and had entrusted her to her uncle’s care. Her parents never paid any attention to her studies, but she ultimately got into university and followed her aunt and uncle in believing in God. Now, this sister is doing her duty and following the correct path in life. The path people take is not at all related to how their parents care for and educate them, and it is not something their parents can change. However, I couldn’t see these things clearly, always worrying about my son’s future prospects and fate and unable to do my duty normally; even my eating and drinking of God’s words was disturbed. I wanted nothing more than to suffer in my son’s place, even demanding that God protect him from the cruelty of those devils and make sure he got through that difficult time safely. Did I have even a sliver of reason? Thinking about it more closely, when my son was first arrested, his stature was small and he didn’t dare admit that he believed in God; he had no testimony. 10 years later, he was arrested again, and God had certainly permitted this. He was giving my son a chance to repent; He was testing him. If my son could triumph over the constraints of the great red dragon’s influence of darkness, risking his life to stand firm in his testimony to God, then his being arrested this time was deeply meaningful and a way for him to be made perfect. However, I had acted based on my feelings and hadn’t sought God’s intention, thinking that a comfortable environment in which my son’s flesh did not suffer was beneficial to him. My way of viewing things did not at all comply with God’s intention; it was truly preposterous! Whether or not my son could stand firm in his testimony this time depended on his essence, what he usually pursued, and the path he walked. I shouldn’t be overly anxious about my son’s future prospects and fate, going so far as to blame God and complain about the brothers and sisters. Understanding this, my heart felt a bit released.

During my seeking, I read more of God’s words. “Besides birth and childrearing, the parents’ responsibility in their children’s lives is simply to provide them with a formal environment to grow up in, for nothing except the predestination of the Creator has a bearing on a person’s fate. No one can control what kind of future a person will have; it is predetermined long in advance, and not even one’s parents can change one’s fate. As far as fate is concerned, everyone is independent, and everyone has their own fate. So, no one’s parents can stave off one’s fate in life or exert the slightest influence on the role one plays in life. It could be said that the family into which one is destined to be born and the environment in which one grows up are nothing more than the preconditions for fulfilling one’s mission in life. They do not in any way determine a person’s fate in life or the kind of destiny within which a person fulfills their mission. And so, no one’s parents can assist one in accomplishing one’s mission in life, and likewise, no one’s relatives can help one assume one’s role in life. How one accomplishes one’s mission and in what kind of living environment one performs one’s role are entirely determined by one’s fate in life. In other words, no other objective conditions can influence a person’s mission, which is predestined by the Creator. All people become mature in the particular environments in which they grow up; then gradually, step by step, they set off down their own roads in life and fulfill the destinies planned for them by the Creator. Naturally, involuntarily, they enter the vast sea of humanity and assume their own posts in life, where they begin to fulfill their responsibilities as created beings for the sake of the Creator’s predestination, for the sake of His sovereignty” (The Word, Vol. 2. On Knowing God. God Himself, the Unique III). God spoke with great clarity about parents’ responsibilities toward their children. As a parent, my responsibility is to raise my son into adulthood, ensure that he grows in a healthy way, bring him before God, tell him that his life comes from God, and get him to believe in God and walk the correct path. These are my responsibilities and obligations as a parent. But whether or not my son stands firm in his testimony after being arrested and whether his future outcome and destination is one of gaining blessings or being punished are not things that I can change. As a created being, I should accept and submit to God’s sovereignty and arrangements with reason. Only this is in line with God’s intention. Understanding this, my heart was completely released. Whether or not my son stood firm in his testimony, and whether he received blessings or adversity in the future, I was willing to accept and submit to it.

Now, when I think of my son, although I still get a bit worried, it doesn’t influence my state, and I can do my duty normally. I thank God from my heart!