I

Oh God! Regardless of the time or place, You know that I always miss You.

No matter the time or place, You know that I want to love You,

but my stature is too small, I am too weak and powerless,

my love is too limited, and my sincerity toward You is too meager.

Compared to Your love, I am simply unfit to live.

I wish only that my life is not in vain,

and that I am able to not only repay Your love,

but, moreover, that I am able to devote all I have to You.

If I can satisfy You, then as a created being,

I shall have peace of mind, and will ask for nothing more.

Although I am weak and powerless now,

I will not forget Your exhortations, and I will not forget Your love.

II

Oh God! You know I am of small stature, that my love is too meager.

How can I do the best that I can in this kind of environment?

I beg You to give me strength and confidence,

so that I will be more able to possess a pure love to devote to You,

and more able to devote all that I have to You;

not only will I be able to repay Your love,

but I will be more able to experience Your chastisement,

judgment and trials, and even more severe curses.

Your love, chastisement and judgment have all caused me to know You,

yet I also feel incapable of satisfying Your love,

for You are so great, You are so great.

How can I devote all that I have to the Creator?

III

Oh God! Man is of childish stature, his conscience is feeble,

and the only thing I can achieve is to repay Your love.

Today, I know not how to satisfy Your intentions,

and I only wish to do all I can, give all I have,

and devote all I have to You, devote all I have to You.

Regardless of Your judgment, regardless of Your chastisement,

regardless of what You bestow upon me,

regardless of what You take away from me,

make me free from the slightest complaint toward You.

Many times, when You chastised me and judged me,

I grumbled to myself,

and was incapable of achieving purity, or of fulfilling Your wishes.

My repayment of Your love was born out of compulsion,

and at this moment I hate myself even more.

IV

Today I should not be content with repaying Your love using my conscience

and with however much love I give back to You,

because my thoughts are too corrupt,

and I am incapable of seeing You as the Creator.

Because I am still unfit to love You,

I must cultivate the ability to give all I have to You, and do so willingly,

I must know all that You have done, and make none of my own choices,

I must behold Your love,

and be able to speak Your praises and extol Your holy name,

so that You may gain great glory through me.

I am willing to stand fast in this testimony to You.

from The Word, Vol. 1. The Appearance and Work of God. The Experiences of Peter: His Knowledge of Chastisement and Judgment