By Yang Yi, China

I always used to think that brothers and sisters who were leaders or workers in the church, or who did text-based duties, had rapid life growth. In particular, when doing text-based duties, you engage with experiential testimony articles and discuss topics related to life entry every single day, so I desperately hoped that I would be able to do text-based duties. I believed that in this way I would achieve rapid life growth, and that I would have a greater hope of being saved and surviving in the future. I remember that once, I came into contact with a brother who had been doing text-based duties for several years. I saw that his fellowship on God’s words was pretty on point, and he spoke with depth. When things came upon him, he was able to seek the truth to reflect on and come to understand himself, and his life entry was quite good. If other brothers and sisters had any problems or difficulties, he was generally able to fellowship and resolve them by incorporating the words of God. I was very envious at the time, and thought to myself, “It would be great if I could have that kind of caliber! That way, my life growth would be faster, and I would have a greater hope of being saved and surviving in the future.” Later I learned that this brother had not only done text-based duties for several years, but had also written scripts. He said that before he had done text-based duties, he didn’t know how to express himself when he was speaking or fellowshipping, and his entry was rather shallow when things came upon him; after doing text-based duties, he made some progress. Hearing him say this, I believed even more firmly that doing text-based duties meant rapid life growth, and that if I wanted to be saved, I would have to do text-based duties. Since then I looked forward even more to having the opportunity to do text-based duties.

In early December 2021, I was doing computer technician duty, but as fewer people were required for that duty, the supervisor asked me if I wanted to do text-based duties. I was inwardly delighted when I heard this, thinking that finally, I had the opportunity to do text-based duties. I accepted it with great happiness. In the beginning, I was responsible for the text-based work of one church, but later, I wanted to be responsible for some more churches so that I would get more training, my life growth would be faster, and I would have a greater hope of being saved and surviving in the future. Therefore, I shared my thoughts with the leaders, and they agreed. Not long afterward, I received a letter from the leaders, asking me to send them a written list of the computer skills I had mastered within two days. I thought this was a bit strange, and asked myself, “I’m doing text-based duties now. Why are they asking me to write this? Do they want to assign me to do computer technician duty again?” I thought back to when I had been doing computer technician duty. Every day, I was either researching technology or searching for information online. I was always busy with doing tasks and didn’t achieve any life entry. If I went back to doing this duty, then I would just be one who toils and labors in the future, and in the end, I would be eliminated by God. I didn’t want to do this duty again, so I didn’t write the list. After a few days, the leaders wrote to me and asked me if I had finished writing the list. I said no, and asked them if they wanted to assign me to do computer technician duty again. I also fellowshipped with them, incorporating God’s words, to say that my assignment to do text-based duties had been weighed up according to principles. After I replied with this, the leaders didn’t say anything else. However, in the following days I felt uneasy whenever I thought about this matter. Was what I was doing in accordance with God’s intention? I had to pray and seek in order to avoid doing something wrong and offending God.

One morning during my devotionals, I read the words of God: “How should someone who pursues the truth view people? Their views on people and things, and their comportment and actions, must all be according to God’s words, with the truth as their criterion. So, how do you regard each and every person according to God’s words? Look at whether they are possessed of a conscience and reason, at whether they’re a good person or an evil one. In your contact with them, you may see that though they have their share of little defects and deficiencies, they are quite good in their humanity. They are tolerant and patient in their interactions with people, and when someone is negative and weak, they are loving to them and can provide for them and help them. That is their attitude toward others. What, then, is their attitude toward God? In their attitude toward God, it is even more measurable whether they have humanity. It may be that with all God does, they are submissive, and seeking, and longing, and in the course of performing their duty and interacting with others—when they take action—they have a God-fearing heart. It’s not that they’re daredevils, acting outrageously, and it’s not that they’d do anything and say anything. When something happens that involves God or His work, they’re very cautious. Once you’ve ascertained that they have these displays, how, based on the things that pour forth from their humanity, are you to measure whether that person is good or bad? Measure that based on God’s words, and measure it based on whether they have a conscience and reason, and on their attitude toward the truth and toward God. By measuring them in these two regards, you will see that though there are a few problems and defects in their behavior, they may yet be someone with a conscience and reason, who has a heart of submission and fear toward God and an attitude of love and acceptance toward the truth. If so, then in God’s eye, they’re someone who may be saved, someone whom He loves” (The Word, Vol. 6. On the Pursuit of the Truth. What It Means to Pursue the Truth (3)). As I pondered God’s words, I understood that in order to measure whether a person has humanity and whether they pursue the truth, you need to look at whether they treat matters relating to God and the work of God’s house cautiously, and whether they have a God-fearing and God-seeking heart. In contrast, looking at myself, when the leaders asked me to write down what computer skills I had mastered, I guessed that they might want to assign me to do computer technician duty, and so I was unwilling. I believed that I hadn’t achieved any life entry when I was doing that duty before, and that doing it was merely toiling and laboring with no chance of being saved in the future. Therefore, I just didn’t want to do computer technician duty. On the other hand, I believed that when doing text-based duties, I would engage with matters relating to life entry every day, my life growth would be fast, and I would have more hope of being saved in the future. Therefore, I wanted to do text-based duties. When it came to the work of the church, I only considered whether I could obtain blessings in the future, and did not have a seeking attitude or a God-fearing heart at all. The church always arranges duties according to the needs of the work, and in accordance with the strengths and caliber of each individual. I can’t have personal preferences and choices, but should give priority to the interests of the church. When I understood this, my heart brightened, and I knew that I could no longer make choices as I liked in this matter. I wrote a letter to the district leaders expressing my willingness to submit to the church’s arrangements. Two days later, the district leaders wrote to say that people were urgently needed to do computer technician duty, and they wanted to arrange for me to do it. I accepted.

One month later, I saw that all I was doing every day was replying to letters or implementing and following up on some technical work. I felt like I was just doing tasks and that my life entry was not making any progress. If this continued, I really would become one who merely toiled and labored, and I would have zero hope of being saved in the future. When I thought this, I just couldn’t muster any motivation in my heart. Even though I was doing whatever I was asked to do, I bore no burden in my duty, and I did not ponder how to do this duty well; I was also very passive in learning skills. I began to miss the days when I was doing text-based duties, and felt like it would be much better to do text-based duties. Then, after training for a while, I would achieve life growth and learn to seek the truth to solve my own problems when things came upon me. I wouldn’t live surrounded by endless tasks, not being able to experience God’s work and not achieving much life growth. The more I thought like this, the weaker I felt. I even regretted agreeing when the leaders asked me to do computer technician duty. However, I couldn’t go back now. I could only carry on, feeling helpless. Nevertheless, I just couldn’t muster any motivation or submit completely. I often prayed to God in my heart to seek, “Dear God, I don’t understand what Your intention is in this environment coming upon me. What lessons do You want me to learn in this environment? Which aspects of my corrupt disposition need to be cleansed and transformed? May You enlighten and lead me.”

Later, I read God’s words: “Antichrists never obey the arrangements of God’s house, and they always closely link their duty, fame, gain, and status with their hope of gaining blessings and their future destination, as if once their reputation and status are lost, they have no hope of gaining blessings and rewards, and this feels like losing their lives to them. They think, ‘I have to be careful, I mustn’t be careless! God’s house, the brothers and sisters, the leaders and workers, and even god can’t be relied upon. I can’t trust any of them. The person you can rely on most and who is most worthy of trust is yourself. If you’re not making plans for yourself, then who is going to care about you? Who is going to consider your future? Who is going to consider whether or not you’re going to receive blessings? Therefore, I have to make careful plans and calculations for my own sake. I can’t make mistakes or be even slightly careless, otherwise, what will I do if somebody tries to take advantage of me?’ Therefore, they guard themselves against the leaders and workers of God’s house, fearing that somebody will discern or see through them, and that they’ll then be dismissed and their dream of blessings will be spoiled. They think they must maintain their reputation and status in order for them to have hope of gaining blessings. An antichrist sees being blessed as greater than the heavens, greater than life, more important than pursuing the truth, dispositional change, or personal salvation, and more important than doing their duty well, and being a created being that is up to standard. They think that being a created being that is up to standard, doing their duty well and being saved are all paltry things that are hardly worth mentioning or remarking on, while gaining blessings is the only thing in their entire life that can never be forgotten. In whatever they encounter, no matter how great or small, they relate it to being blessed, and are incredibly cautious and attentive, and they always leave a way out for themselves” (The Word, Vol. 4. Exposing Antichrists. Item Twelve: They Want to Withdraw When They Have No Status or No Hope of Gaining Blessings). “It is no accident that antichrists are able to do their duty—they absolutely do their duty with their own intentions and purposes and the desire to gain blessings. Whatever duty they do, their purpose and attitude are of course inseparable from gaining blessings, the good destination and the good prospects and destiny which they think about and are concerned with day and night. They are like businesspeople who don’t talk about anything besides their work. Whatever antichrists do is all linked to fame, gain, and status—it is all linked to gaining blessings and prospects and destiny. Deep down, their hearts are full of such things; this is the nature essence of antichrists. It is precisely because of this kind of nature essence that others are able to clearly see that their ultimate end is to be eliminated” (The Word, Vol. 4. Exposing Antichrists. Item Nine (Part Seven)). God exposes that antichrists bring personal intentions and purposes into their belief in God and performance of their duty. To obtain blessings, in everything they do they behave cautiously and attentively, calculating shrewdly. When adjustments in their duty assignment come upon them and affect their desire to obtain blessings, this feels like they are losing their lives. This is the nature essence of antichrists. When I reflected on myself in light of God’s words, I saw my behavior was identical to that of an antichrist. In doing my duty, I thought about gaining blessings at every turn. I had always believed that doing text-based duties would enable rapid life growth, and give me a greater hope of being saved in the future. On the other hand, I believed that doing other duties would mean slow life growth and a slim hope of survival. When I had the opportunity to do text-based duties, on the surface, I was actively following up on the text-based work; I even wanted my leaders to arrange for me to be in charge of a few more churches. However, my intention and aim in doing this was not to bear a genuine burden in my duty; even less was it to do my duty well and show consideration for God’s intentions. Instead, it was to obtain blessings. When the leaders wrote to me and asked me to write a list of the computer skills I had mastered, I guessed that they wanted to arrange for me to do computer technician duty, and I felt very resistant. I felt that doing computer technician duty was just toiling and doing tasks, that I wouldn’t achieve life entry, that it was merely laboring, and that my probability of being saved and surviving in the future was very small. The emotions revealed in my heart were all about being averse and resistant, but I even waved around principles as I self-righteously fellowshipped with the leaders about how I was suited to doing text-based duties. Later, although I agreed to do technician duty, after I had been doing it for a while, I felt like I was merely doing tasks every day, and not achieving any life entry. I worried that if this continued, there would be no hope of salvation for me, so I lived amidst complaints and negativity. I lost all interest in doing my duties or learning skills, and was very passive. I even regretted doing this duty. Actually, the church always assigns duties based on the needs of the work. The church was in urgent need of people to do duties relating to computer technology, and this is a duty that I am skilled in. Anyone possessed of conscience, reason and humanity would have let go of their personal interests and considered the overall work of the church so it was not affected. However, at every turn I considered how to obtain blessings and how to be saved and survive. I calculated how to obtain blessings shrewdly, was dissatisfied with and resistant to the arrangements of the leaders, and was negative and slacked off in doing my duty. On the surface, I seemed to be dissatisfied with the leaders, but the essence of it was being resistant to the environment set up by God. This was resisting and rebelling against God! I thought of Paul, from the Age of Grace. On the surface, he appeared to forsake, expend, suffer, and pay a price in his belief in God. However, he was trying to bargain with God all along; he was trying to trick God and use God to obtain the crown of righteousness in the future. All his acts were considered to be evil deeds in God’s eyes, and he was ultimately eliminated and punished by God. My behavior was the same as Paul’s. I forsook, expended, suffered, and paid a price in doing my duty only to obtain blessings. I was trying to bargain with God and use God to obtain a wonderful destination in exchange. I brought these impurities into my belief in God and my duty; in God’s eyes, this was evil. If I never repented, I would be eliminated by God. I thought about God coming to work and express His words to save people today, asking people to do duties in His house. In this, He hopes that we will pursue the truth in doing our duties, accept the judgment and chastisement of His words, and ultimately obtain the truth and achieve a change in disposition, living out a true human likeness. He hopes that we will finally become people who truly submit to and worship God. God’s disposition is righteous and holy; filthy people are not permitted entry into the kingdom. Still less would anyone who tried to bargain with, trick, and use God, and whose disposition had not changed at all be allowed in. In doing my duty, I had constantly pursued blessings, not the truth or a change in my disposition. How could someone like me, filled with satanic corrupt dispositions, enter the kingdom of God? If I continued to pursue in this way, then even if I were allowed to do text-based duties, I would ultimately be eliminated by God because my disposition had not changed. When I understood this, I felt fear in my heart, and realized that I couldn’t pursue like this anymore.

Later, I also pondered: I had always thought that only when doing text-based duties could you have rapid life growth, while your life growth would be slow when doing computer technician duty. Was this view correct? I sought relevant truths regarding this issue. I read the words of God: “Any duty you perform involves life entry. Whether your duty is rather regular or erratic, dull or lively, you must always attain life entry” (The Word, Vol. 3. The Discourses of Christ of the Last Days. Life Entry Begins With the Performance of Duty). “Do you now understand what obtaining the truth and entering into the truth reality depend on? They depend on seeking the truth and practicing the truth—just those two things, simple as that. Although the truth expressed by God is recorded in written form, the reality of truth is not in writing, much less understandable or comprehensible to man from its written words. So, what must be done to understand the truth? Understanding and gaining the truth is mainly done through practicing and experiencing God’s words, experiencing His work, through seeking the truth, and through the enlightenment of the Holy Spirit. The reality of the truth is realized through people practicing and undergoing the truth; it is something that comes from experience, something man lives out. The truth is not an empty theory, nor a simple, pleasant phrase. It is language rich with life power; it is eternal maxims of life; it is the most practical, precious thing that can accompany one in life, for one’s entire lifetime. What is the truth? The truth is the foundation of existence in man’s life, the principles of practice in conducting oneself and dealing with things. The truth gives one direction and purpose in life; it enables one to live out the likeness of a genuine person, and to live before God in submission and worship of Him. That is why people can’t live without the truth. So, what do you now rely on to live? Which thoughts and viewpoints do you have? What is your direction and purpose in doing things? If you have the truth reality, your life has principles, direction, and purpose. If you do not, your life has no principles, direction, or purpose. You are undoubtedly living by Satan’s philosophy, by those things of traditional culture. That is how the nonbelievers live” (The Word, Vol. 3. The Discourses of Christ of the Last Days. Part Three). “It is not the case that people become someone who has truth realities as soon as they start doing their duty. Doing one’s duty is no more than one method and one channel to take. In the doing of their duties, people use the pursuit of the truth to experience the work of God, gradually understand and accept the truth, and then practice the truth. They then reach a state where they cast off their corrupt disposition, get rid of the bonds and control of the corrupt disposition of Satan, and so they become someone who has the truth reality and someone with a normal humanity. Only when you have normal humanity will your performance of your duty and your actions be edifying to people and satisfactory to God. And only when people are approved of by God for their performance of their duty can they be an acceptable created being. So, regarding the performing of your duty, although that which you now expend and bring out in devotion are the various skills and learning and knowledge that you have acquired, it is precisely through the channel of performing your duty that you can understand the truth, and know what it is to perform one’s duty, what it is to come before God, what it is to wholeheartedly expend for God. Through this channel, you will know how to cast off your corrupt disposition, and how to rebel against yourselves, not to be arrogant and self-righteous, and to submit to the truth and God. Only thus can you achieve salvation” (The Word, Vol. 3. The Discourses of Christ of the Last Days. To Gain the Truth, One Must Learn From the People, Events, and Things Nearby). As I pondered God’s words, I understood that if people want to obtain the truth and enter into the truth reality, this mainly depends on them seeking the truth and practicing the truth. It has nothing whatsoever to do with what duties a person does. Duty is just a platform for people to train on; it is a path for them to obtain the truth. Whether a person can ultimately obtain the truth and be saved depends on their personal pursuit. If a person does not pursue the truth, then they will not pursue it no matter what duty they are assigned; conversely, if a person does pursue the truth, then they will pursue it no matter what duty they are assigned or what environment they are in. I had always previously thought that doing text-based duties meant rapid life growth, and doing computer technician duty meant slow life growth. This view is completely wrong and utterly untenable. God does not treat anyone unfairly. Anyone who seeks the truth and practices the truth will ultimately be able to obtain the truth; anyone who does not seek the truth or practice the truth will not obtain the truth. This is God’s righteousness. I thought of someone who had done text-based duties in the past. She did her duties by relying on her gifts and caliber. When things came upon her, she did not seek the truth or learn lessons, and did not focus on her life entry. Ultimately, she was removed from her duty because she did not pursue the truth. Later, she started to pursue the evil trends of the world and was unwilling to even attend gatherings, so she was revealed and eliminated. Some brothers and sisters who do general affairs duty seek the truth, pray to God, and focus on practicing the truth when things come upon them. After a period of time, you can see that they have achieved life growth and can understand some truths. I thought about the time I was doing computer technician duty. Normally, when I implemented and followed up on technical work, I treated these things as external matters. I didn’t seek the truth principle within them, and only did my duty by relying on my gifts and caliber. How could I achieve life entry like that? The reason I didn’t achieve any life entry when I was doing computer technician duty was entirely because I didn’t pursue the truth. In giving people the opportunity to do duty, God’s intention is that they will fulfill their responsibilities in every kind of duty, gain training, achieve life entry, and do their duties in accordance with His words and requirements. He doesn’t want people to just toil and do tasks. Afterward, I also pondered: In God’s house, every duty involves many aspects of the truth and requires people to achieve life entry. So what truths are involved in doing computer technician duty? By pondering, I realized that there are truths related to doing your duty loyally and cooperating harmoniously with others, and studying techniques and learning professional skills also involves truths about relying on God and looking up to God. Without God’s enlightenment and leadership, there are many techniques that I would never be able to figure out on my own. I discovered that there are many truths to enter into. These truths are actually involved in the performance of every duty, and they are all interconnected. The idea that “you can achieve life entry by doing text-based duties, but cannot by doing technical duties” is completely untenable. Every duty involves life entry. After understanding this, my heart felt liberated, and I could accept the computer technician duty I was doing now from the bottom of my heart and treat it correctly.

Not long after, I received a letter from the leaders arranging for me to go to another place to do computer technician duty. I felt a little shaken and thought, “After this, I might never have another opportunity to do text-based duties again!” I couldn’t help feeling a little dejected. However, I knew God was scrutinizing my heart, and I couldn’t act like I did last time. I had to practice the truth and let go of these fallacious views and the intention to gain blessings, so I prayed to God in willingness to submit to the arrangements of the church.

Later, I also sought regarding the issue of how to pay attention to life entry in doing my duty, and found a path of practice after reading God’s words. God says: “So, what does it mean to pursue the truth? To view people and things, and to comport oneself and act, wholly based on God’s words, according to God’s words, with the truth as one’s criterion—that is what it means to pursue the truth” (The Word, Vol. 6. On the Pursuit of the Truth. What It Means to Pursue the Truth (2)). “Read once again what it means to pursue the truth. (What does it mean to pursue the truth? To view people and things, and to comport oneself and act, wholly according to God’s words, with the truth as one’s criterion.) You must inscribe these words in your hearts, and use them as your life motto. Take them out often so that you may think about them and consider them; hold your behavior, your attitude in life, your views on things, and your intents and goals up against them for comparison. You will then be able to clearly feel what your true state is, and what the disposition essence you pour forth is. Compare them to these words, and take these words as your principles of practice, and as the path and direction for your practice. When you pursue in this way, when you are able to completely enter into and live out these words, you will understand what it means to pursue the truth. Naturally, when you enter into the reality of these words, you will have already embarked on the path of pursuing the truth” (The Word, Vol. 6. On the Pursuit of the Truth. What It Means to Pursue the Truth (2)). “Just how should pursuit of the truth be practiced? Do you experience God’s work in the daily performance of your duty? Have you prayed to God when faced with problems, and can you resolve them by seeking the truth? This relates to the issue of life entry. When you reveal your corruption while performing your duty, are you able to self-reflect and resolve the problem of your corrupt disposition according to God’s words? If you cannot practice and experience it this way, then it has nothing to do with believing in God. No matter what duty you are performing nor what you are doing, you must try to fathom which aspects of God’s words are involved, as well as your own thoughts, opinions, or incorrect intentions, all of which are parts of man’s state. What does man’s state include? It includes people’s standpoints, attitudes, intentions, and views, as well as some satanic philosophies, logic, and knowledge—and all these things, in brief, are related to people’s usual modes and methods of action and treatment of others. When faced with a situation, one must first examine what their view is—this is the first step. The second step is to examine whether that view is correct. How, then, should one determine whether their view is correct or not? It is determined once with God’s words, and again according to the principles of the sort of situation in question. For instance, the work arrangements, interests, and rules of God’s house, as well as the explicit words of God—use these things to determine whether a view is correct. They are the standards of measurement” (The Word, Vol. 3. The Discourses of Christ of the Last Days. The Attitude Man Should Have Toward God). As I pondered God’s words, I understood that the most critical thing in pursuing the truth is to view people and things, and to conduct yourself and act, with God’s words as your basis and the truth as your criterion. Whether in doing your duty or in daily life, your behavior, your conduct, and your perspective on things must be based on God’s words; you must practice in accordance with God’s requirements; you must pray to God when things come upon you; and you must weigh up according to the truth principle whether the perspectives and intentions in your actions are correct, in accordance with God’s intentions, and align with God’s requirements. If you do your duty in this way, you will achieve life entry. I thought of how God requires that people must fulfill their duty “with all their heart, soul, and mind” (The Word, Vol. 3. The Discourses of Christ of the Last Days. Only One Who Performs Their Duty Well With All Their Heart, Mind, and Soul Is One Who Loves God). I brought these words of God into the performance of my duty. When faced with questions from my brothers and sisters, I carefully pondered them, and when some difficulties that I didn’t know how to deal with or didn’t understand came upon me, I prayed to God to seek. By practicing in this way, I felt God’s leadership and guidance in my duty, and gradually became able to penetrate some problems somewhat, finding some paths to resolve them. I also often came before God in prayer, examining what problems still existed in my performance of my duty, and what things I was not doing properly. Sometimes, I would read a passage of God’s words in my devotionals which would help me see the problems in my performance of my duty more clearly. I also focused on resolving my own corrupt disposition in daily life, and examined what my words and actions in my relationships with my brothers and sisters revealed. I discovered that my arrogant disposition was quite serious. In particular, when I thought I was correct, I really wanted other people to agree with me and got unhappy if they didn’t. After a period of seeking and self-reflection, I came to understand my own arrogant disposition somewhat, and consciously rebelled against myself to accept the suggestions of my brothers and sisters. After practicing in this way for a time, I felt that I had achieved some life entry in doing my duty.

Through this experience, I found some paths toward achieving life entry in doing my duty. I thought back to when I was afraid to do technician duty, and constantly felt that when doing this kind of duty, I was liable to get caught up in doing tasks and not achieve any life entry. Now when I look at it, I see that this was all caused by me not pursuing the truth or seeking the truth. Achieving life entry has nothing to do whatsoever with the duty you do. That I was able to gain this small understanding and entry is a result achieved with the leadership of God’s words. Thank God!