Pursue the Truth Even More in Old Age
I was born into a Christian home, and I accepted’s work of the last days when I was 60. I felt so lucky to be able to welcome the Lord in the last days and accept God’s end-time work, and that my dream of being saved and entering the kingdom would soon be realized. So long as I worked hard in my duty and made sacrifices, I’d have the chance to receive God’s salvation. After that, I put my all into any duty that the church arranged for me, and even by 70, I was still able to ride my bike around and do some errands for the church. I’d run up and down the stairs doing my duty, never feeling tired. I was happy I could still perform a duty. As I kept getting older, my bodily functions were impacted by aging and I wasn’t physically the same. Considering my health, the church assigned me to hosting duties at home. I was kind of disappointed. As I continued aging, my eyesight declined and I couldn’t ride my bike to do a duty anymore. All I could do was take on hosting duty. If I couldn’t do any duties at all as I kept getting older, could I still be saved? I thought of how great it would be if I were a few years younger, and I really envied the younger brothers and sisters who could travel around working for God.
Last March, the church leader arranged for me to go support Sister Yu Xin. She was 78 and having a hard time getting around because of her health, and she couldn’t perform any duty at all. Seeing the state she was in left me feeling sad and distressed. I was already over 80, even older than Sister Yu Xin, my health wasn’t what it used to be, and I didn’t know if one day I’d also get sick and be unable to do a duty, and what use would I be then? Would I have hope for salvation if I couldn’t do any duties? I felt more upset the more I thought about it. Then I got sick, too. Once, I felt dizzy when I got up in the middle of the night to use the bathroom, and by the morning, I couldn’t get out of bed. I was so dazed that I couldn’t even open my eyes. I was vomiting and had diarrhea, and couldn’t even keep water down. My wife called our daughter to have her come take care of me, and after two days, I finally started to recover. I wasn’t held up in my duty, but I was really weak and didn’t have the energy to do anything. I couldn’t keep food down, and I felt dazed and nauseous. I was worried, as an old man, with my health declining by the day, if I got sick like that again, would I be able to recover that quickly? If I didn’t get better within short order and needed someone to care for me, I wouldn’t be able to perform any duty, and wouldn’t that make me useless? Could I get into the kingdom without a duty? How great it would be to be a few years younger, as I was 20 years ago when I’d just accepted this stage of work, unafraid to do anything. Whatever the church assigned to me, near or far, I could get it done. With a duty, I had more hope of being blessed. But I couldn’t turn back the clock and wasn’t fit for anything. So I just muddled through the days. Before I knew it, I was living in a state of negativity and misunderstanding. My state kept declining. I lost the heart to readand I didn’t have the drive to do anything. I wasn’t putting my heart into my duty like before. I prayed to God, “God! I feel like now that I’m older and I can’t do many duties, there’s no hope for me to enter the kingdom and be saved. I’m really down. Oh God, please give me faith and guide me so that I’m not held back by old age and can understand Your will, and come out from this state.”
My state started to turn around when I read some of God’s words. Almighty God says, “There are also elderly people among brothers and sisters, who are aged from 60 up to around 80 or 90 and who, because of their advanced age, also experience some difficulties. Despite their age, their thinking is not necessarily so correct or rational, and their ideas and views do not necessarily accord with the truth. These elderly people have problems just the same, and they’re always worrying, ‘My health isn’t so good anymore and I’m limited as to what duty I can perform. If I just perform this little duty, will God remember me? Sometimes I get sick, and I need someone to look after me. When there’s no one to look after me, I’m not able to perform my duty, so what can I do? I’m old and I don’t remember God’s words when I read them and it’s hard for me to understand the truth. When fellowshiping on the truth, I speak in a muddled and illogical way, and I haven’t any experiences worth sharing. I’m old and I don’t have enough energy, my eyesight isn’t very good and I’m not strong anymore. Everything is difficult for me. Not only can I not perform my duty, but I easily forget things and get things wrong. Sometimes I get confused and I cause problems for the church and for my brothers and sisters. I want to attain salvation and pursue the truth but it’s very hard. What can I do?’ … In particular, there are some elderly people who want to spend all their time expending themselves for God and performing their duty, but they’re physically unwell. Some have high blood pressure, some have high blood sugar, some have gastrointestinal problems, and their physical strength cannot keep up with the demands of their duty, and so they fret. They see young people able to eat and drink, to run and jump, and they feel envious. The more they see young people do such things, the more distressed they feel, thinking, ‘I want to do my duty well and pursue and understand the truth, and I want to practice the truth, too, so why is it so hard? I’m so old and useless! Does God not want old people? Are old people really useless? Can we not attain salvation?’ They’re sad and unable to feel happy no matter how they think about it. They don’t want to miss such a wonderful time and such a great opportunity, yet they’re unable to expend themselves and perform their duty with all their heart and soul like young people do. These elderly people fall into deep distress, anxiety, and worry because of their age. Every time they encounter some difficulty, setback, hardship, or obstacle, they blame their age, and even hate themselves and have no liking for themselves. But in any case, it is to no avail, there is no solution, and they have no way forward. Could it be that they really have no way forward? Is there any solution? (Elderly people should also perform their duties as much as they’re able.) It’s acceptable for elderly people to perform their duties as much as they’re able, right? Can elderly people not pursue the truth anymore because of their age? Are they not capable of understanding the truth? (Yes, they are.) Can elderly people understand the truth? They can understand some, and not even young people can understand it all, either. Elderly people always have a misconception, believing that they’re confused, that their memory is bad, and so they can’t understand the truth. Are they right? (No.) Although young people have much more energy than elderly people, and are physically stronger, actually their capacity to understand, comprehend, and know is just the same as that of elderly people. Weren’t elderly people once young as well? They weren’t born old, and young people will all grow old one day, too. Elderly people mustn’t always be thinking that because they’re old, physically weak, unwell, and with bad memories, they’re different from young people. In fact, there is no difference. What do I mean when I say there is no difference? Whether someone is old or young, their corrupt dispositions are the same, their attitudes and views on all manner of things are the same, and their perspectives and standpoints on all manner of things are the same. So, elderly people mustn’t think that because they’re old, with fewer extravagant desires than young people, and able to be stable, they have no wild ambitions or desires, and that they have fewer corrupt dispositions—this is a misconception. Young people can jockey for position, so can’t elderly people jockey for position? Young people can do things against the principles and act arbitrarily, so can’t elderly people do the same? (Yes, they can.) Young people can be arrogant, so can’t elderly people also be arrogant? However, when elderly people are arrogant, due to their advanced age they aren’t so aggressive, and it’s not such a high-minded arrogance. Young people show more obvious manifestations of arrogance due to their flexible limbs and minds, while older people show less obvious manifestations of arrogance due to their rigid limbs and inflexible minds. However, their essence of arrogance and their corrupt dispositions are the same. No matter how long an elderly person has believed in God for, or how many years they have performed their duty for, if they are not in pursuit of the truth, then their corrupt dispositions will remain. … So, it is not that elderly people have nothing to do, nor are they unable to perform their duties, much less are they unable to pursue the truth—there are many things for them to do. The various heresies and fallacies that you have accumulated during your lifetime, as well as the various traditional ideas and notions, ignorant and stubborn things, conservative things, irrational things, and absurd things that you have accumulated have all piled up in your heart, and you should spend even more time than young people to dig out, dissect, and recognize these things. It’s not the case that you have nothing to do, or that you should feel distressed, anxious, and worried when you are at a loose end—this is neither your task nor your responsibility. First of all, elderly people should have the correct mindset. Although you may be getting on in years and you are physically relatively aged, still you should have a young mindset. Although you’re getting old, your thinking is slowed and your memory is poor, if you can still know yourself, still understand the words I say, and still understand the truth, then that proves you are not old and that your caliber is not lacking. If someone is in their 70s but is not able to understand the truth, then this shows that their stature is too small and not up to the task. Therefore, age is irrelevant when it comes to the truth” (The Word, Vol. 6. On the Pursuit of the Truth I. How to Pursue the Truth (3)). I read that passage quite a few times. God’s words really did go straight to the heart of me, revealing my precise state. I saw that I was old now and not in the same condition, so I couldn’t keep running about doing a duty, and could just be a host at home. And when I saw Sister Yu Xin’s condition, at home, unable to do a duty, I really worried about my age, that if one day I really couldn’t get around or do a duty, I couldn’t be saved. The thought of not getting into the kingdom was really painful and upsetting for me, and it made me worry about my destination. I lived in a negative, pessimistic state, and lost my drive to do anything. Reading God’s words moved me and brightened my heart. It’s not like old people don’t have any options and can’t be saved, that we can’t do anything or take on a duty. Old age doesn’t mean your heart is old, and that there isn’t anything you can do. Older people can still do things just like before, reading God’s words and praying when we should, and doing whatever duty we can do as usual. God has never said He doesn’t approve of the elderly because they can’t do as many duties. Also, both the old and young have corrupt dispositions, and we all need to seek the truth. Particularly for older people like me, through a life at home, school, and out in society, we have built up all sorts of thoughts, notions, and philosophies on life. So many of these satanic philosophies, heresies and fallacies had piled up in my head. I’d been a believer for years, but these satanic poisons were still entrenched in me and had become my rules for survival. Sometimes when I was in a gathering with others, I noticed someone living in an incorrect state or spreading negativity. I saw very clearly that what they said to the others wasn’t edifying, but I kept my mouth shut to protect my interpersonal relationships. I lived by the satanic philosophy, “Keeping silent on the faults of good friends makes for a long and good friendship.” I was unwilling to practice the truth, reluctant to cause offense. And in gatherings, when we talked about some things figures from the Bible did, some brothers and sisters didn’t understand it, and I displayed an arrogant disposition. I felt that as an old Christian, I knew more than they did, so I’d go on and on explaining it to them, using that as capital to show off. With so many corrupt dispositions that hadn’t been resolved, I should have felt more urgency and put effort into pursuing the truth. I should seek the truth more in my remaining years to resolve my corruption. There are so many things I should do and truths I should enter into. However, I always envied young people for having good health and lots of possible duties, thinking they had more hope of salvation. Now that I couldn’t get around and my duties were limited, I worried I wouldn’t have a place in the kingdom. I sank into a negative state I couldn’t get out of. Thinking of it now, that was so foolish. I needed to have a proper attitude. Though we’re older and our flesh is aging, we can still understand God’s words, and we still have normal sense and reason, so we can’t waste any time in pursuing the truth, and we can’t keep living in distress and anxiety. This really comes through in this passage of God’s words: “Although you’re getting old, your thinking is slowed and your memory is poor, if you can still know yourself, still understand the words I say, and still understand the truth, then that proves you are not old and that your caliber is not lacking” (The Word, Vol. 6. On the Pursuit of the Truth I. How to Pursue the Truth (3)). God’s words brightened my heart, and I felt immediately that I had something to strive for. God says we’re not old, so we should pursue the truth diligently in our remaining years even more.
I also read this in God’s words: “I decide the destination of each person not on the basis of age, seniority, amount of suffering, and least of all, the degree to which they invite pity, but according to whether they possess the truth. There is no other choice but this” (The Word, Vol. 1. The Appearance and Work of God. Prepare Sufficient Good Deeds for Your Destination). “God’s wish is for every person to be made perfect, to be ultimately gained by Him, to be completely cleansed by Him, and to become people He loves. It matters not whether I say you are backward or of poor caliber—this is all fact. My saying this does not prove that I intend to forsake you, that I have lost hope in you, much less that I am unwilling to save you. Today I have come to do the work of your salvation, which is to say that the work I do is a continuation of the work of salvation. Every person has the chance to be made perfect: Provided that you are willing, provided that you pursue, in the end you will be able to achieve this result, and not one of you will be forsaken. If you are of poor caliber, My requirements of you will be in accordance with your poor caliber; if you are of high caliber, My requirements of you will be in accordance with your high caliber; if you are ignorant and illiterate, My requirements of you will be in accordance with your illiteracy; if you are literate, My requirements of you will be in accordance with the fact that you are literate; if you are elderly, My requirements of you will be in accordance with your age; if you are capable of providing hospitality, My requirements of you will be in accordance with this capability; if you say you cannot offer hospitality, and can only perform a certain function, whether it be spreading the gospel, or taking care of the church, or attending to other general affairs, My perfection of you will be in accordance with the function that you perform. Being loyal, obeying to the very end, and seeking to have supreme love for God—this is what you must accomplish, and there are no better practices than these three things” (The Word, Vol. 1. The Appearance and Work of God. Restoring the Normal Life of Man and Taking Him to a Wonderful Destination). I was really moved by these words from God. God has never determined someone’s outcome based on their caliber, age, or how many duties they’ve done. God just looks at whether people are devoted and obedient toward Him. So long as someone is resolved to pursue the truth, and they have true faith and love the truth, God won’t abandon them. I saw that God is righteous, and that His requirements aren’t one-size-fits-all. He makes demands of people based on their stature and what they’re able to achieve. Those who can host should host, those who can preach the gospel should do that. People should do whatever duty they can. So long as we can pursue the truth and act based on God’s words, we have a chance at salvation. But I felt like at my advanced age, there wasn’t any duty I could do, and that God wouldn’t approve of me. I was thinking of God like a worldly boss who would keep you when you could work and had value, but would otherwise cast you out. This was a lack of reverence for God. It was also me misunderstanding God’s will because of my mistaken notions and imaginings. Also, God has never said that older people can’t be saved or perfected. I thought back on the antichrists and evildoers expelled from the church. Some were younger than me, and had given up their homes and jobs for their duties. They worked hard by human standards, but they didn’t pursue the truth and their corrupt dispositions didn’t change one bit. They relied on their satanic natures, disrupting the work of God’s house, never repenting, and were finally cast out by God. As for older members, some stay at home doing hosting duties, some keep the church’s books, but they all play their role as they should. God doesn’t turn His back on them or cast them out because of their old age or because they can’t do as many duties. I saw that God casts people out because of their nature essence, not how old they are. Now that I’m old, I can’t support the church the way I used to. I’m hosting others at my home. So I need to do my hosting duty well and maintain a safe environment for gatherings in my home, so that brothers and sisters can come and go in peace. That’s devoting myself to my duty. My neighbor Sister Yu Xin is unwell and needs some support, so I should do whatever I can, meeting and fellowshiping with her. And whenever I encounter challenges or problems, I should pray and read God’s words to solve them. If I can carry five pounds, I’ll carry five pounds, and if I can carry 20, I’ll carry 20. Do your absolute best, and do all you can do—that’s most important. Once I understood that, I felt ashamed and humiliated. I hadn’t understood God’s will, and I wasn’t looking at things or acting based on His words. Instead, I was living by my own mistaken views, misunderstanding God. I was truly rebellious.
I reflected on why I always worried about being old, unable to do a duty, and cast out. What motive was at work behind that? In my seeking, I read a couple passages in God’s words: “Some people become full of vigor as soon as they see that faith in God will bring them blessings, but then lose all energy as soon as they see that they have to suffer refinements. Is that believing in God? Ultimately, you must achieve complete and utter obedience before God in your faith. You believe in God but still have demands of Him, have many religious notions you cannot put down, personal interests you cannot let go of, and still you seek blessings of the flesh and want God to rescue your flesh, to save your soul—these are all behaviors of people who have the wrong perspective. Even though people with religious beliefs have faith in God, they do not seek to change their dispositions and do not pursue knowledge of God, but rather seek only the interests of their flesh. Many among you have faiths that belong in the category of religious convictions; this is not true faith in God. To believe in God, people must possess a heart that is prepared to suffer for Him and the will to give themselves up. Unless people meet these two conditions, their faith in God is not valid, and they will not be able to achieve change in their disposition. Only people who genuinely pursue the truth, seek knowledge of God, and pursue life are those who truly believe in God” (The Word, Vol. 1. The Appearance and Work of God. Those Who Are to Be Made Perfect Must Undergo Refinement). “People believe in God in order to be blessed, to be rewarded, to be crowned. Doesn’t this exist in everyone’s heart? It is a fact that it does. Although people don’t often talk about it, and even cover up their motive and desire to obtain blessings, this desire and motive deep in people’s hearts has always been unshakable. No matter how much spiritual theory people understand, what experience or knowledge they have, what duty they can perform, how much suffering they endure, or how much of a price they pay, they never let go of the motivation for blessings hidden deep in their hearts, and always silently labor in its service. Isn’t this the thing buried deepest inside people’s hearts? Without this motivation to receive blessings, how would you feel? With what attitude would you perform your duty and follow God? What would become of people if this motivation to receive blessings that is hidden in their hearts was gotten rid of? It is possible that many people would become negative, while some would become demotivated in their duties. They would lose interest in their belief in God, as if their soul had vanished. They would appear as if their heart had been snatched away. This is why I say the motivation for blessings is something hidden deep in people’s hearts” (The Word, Vol. 3. The Discourses of Christ of the Last Days. Six Indicators of Life Growth). What God reveals and judges in these words was precisely my state. God really does scrutinize our hearts and minds. This exposed my deep-seated motives and hopes of being blessed, and that my faith was just for blessings. When I’d just accepted this stage of work, I was motivated by the chance to get into the kingdom. I was willing to do whatever the church wanted. I would do my duty, rain or shine. I thought that God would approve so long as I paid a price, and then I’d be saved and gain the blessings of the kingdom of heaven. But now that I saw I was getting old, all my bodily functions impacted by aging, and that I couldn’t do duties I’d been able to do before, I was worried that someday I’d become ill and unable to do a duty. That made me feel sad and distressed. And when I thought of those two days that I was sick and immobile, I felt even more worried that if I got sick again and didn’t get better quickly, I wouldn’t be able to do any duty and I couldn’t be saved. My heart felt empty, and I felt dark and depressed. I didn’t have the drive to read God’s words or pray, thinking I’d just muddle through each day. I really saw that I had a motive to be blessed hidden deep in my heart, firmly entrenched, and that I was always laboring and striving to achieve this goal. On the surface I was doing a duty and wanted to satisfy God, but in fact, I wanted to trade my duty for the blessings of the kingdom of heaven. I was working for my destination. I really am too evil and cunning by nature. I was born into a Christian home, and followed my parents, believing in the since I was little. When I was 60 years old, I accepted God’s work of the last days. I’ve already gained so much. God has clearly fellowshiped every aspect of the truth in the last days, and through the judgment and chastisement of His word, I’ve gained some understanding of my own corrupt nature and satanic poisons, I’m able to despise myself, and my corrupt disposition has changed a bit. These are fruits borne of my experiences of God’s judgment and chastisement. This is such incredible grace from God! I’ve received such great salvation. Even if God were to take this very breath from me right now, I wouldn’t have regrets, and I’d owe God my gratitude. But I’m still alive now, and I still have this breath. I should wholeheartedly pursue the truth and dispositional change. Whether I’m blessed or suffer disaster in the future, I should submit to God’s rule and arrangements. This is the reason I should have as a created being. But after gaining so much sustenance from God’s words, I still didn’t know to repay Him for His love. I wanted to use my duty to make a trade with God for the kingdom’s blessings. I became negative and misunderstood God when I thought I couldn’t get that. I didn’t have a conscience or reason. Where was my humanity? I was so selfish, despicable, and wretched. My motivations and perspectives in faith weren’t right. I just wanted to get into the kingdom of heaven, and I only pursued fleshly gains and blessings. I was on the same path as Paul. I thought of how Paul accomplished so much, but he had faith just to be rewarded and crowned. He was using his work to make a deal with God, to exchange it for the blessings of heaven. He didn’t seek to know God. He was on a path of resisting God. In the end, he was punished by God. My pursuit was the same as Paul’s. I didn’t pursue dispositional change to satisfy God, and I was just doing my duty for blessings. On the surface I was performing a duty, but in essence, I was cheating God. I wasn’t a true believer. A true believer is someone who pursues the truth, who seeks to know and love God. There aren’t any conditions or deals in how they do their duty. There aren’t any personal motives or goals, or extravagant desires. They put everything they have into satisfying God. Just like Peter—though he didn’t do as much work as Paul, he was able to accept God’s judgment and chastisement, know himself, and seek to know and love God. Ultimately, he submitted until the point of death, being crucified upside down for God, bearing witness to glorify God. With faith like mine, always holding on to vile motives and desires, I’d never gain God’s approval no matter how many years I believed. I would only end up rejected and loathed by God. Without repenting, and remaining transactional in my faith and duty, I wouldn’t gain the truth or have dispositional change in the end. I’d end up just like Paul, exposed and cast out by God.
I thought of what God said: “There is no correlation between the duty of man and whether he is blessed or cursed. Duty is what man ought to fulfill; it is his heaven-sent vocation, and should not depend on recompense, conditions, or reasons. Only then is he doing his duty” (The Word, Vol. 1. The Appearance and Work of God. The Difference Between the Ministry of God Incarnate and the Duty of Man). At this point I realized that a duty is what a created being ought to do, and unrelated to receiving blessings or misfortune. As a member of God’s house, I shouldn’t have conditions for Him. I should fulfill my responsibilities. It’s just like a family. When children do what they can for the family, can they really ask for monetary rewards from their parents? That wouldn’t be a family member, but an employee. As a member of God’s family, and as a created being, doing a bit of duty for the Creator is just what I should do, it’s right and natural. I should show my devotion without thoughts of conditions or rewards. That’s what I ought to do. I’m older now and my health isn’t great, but God hasn’t given up on me. He still sustains and guides me with His words. I can’t be devoid of conscience, and I can’t keep living in a negative state, abandoning myself to despair. I should have a proper attitude, and while I’m in my right mind and still have my reason, read God’s words more to know myself and pursue dispositional change, do whatever duty I’m able to do now, and submit to God’s rule and arrangements. I read something else in God’s words: “Every person, no matter your caliber, or age, or the number of years you have believed in God, should put your efforts toward the path of pursuing the truth. You shouldn’t emphasize any objective rationales; you should pursue the truth unconditionally. Don’t idle your days away. If you seek and put your efforts toward the pursuit of the truth as the great matter of your life, it may be that the truth you gain and can reach in your pursuit is not what you’d have wished for. But if God says He will give you a destination depending on your attitude in your pursuit and your sincerity, then how wonderful that will be! Don’t focus on what your destination or outcome will be for now. What will happen and what the future holds, whether you will be able to avoid disaster and not die—don’t think of these things or ask after them. Concentrate only on pursuing the truth in God’s words and His requirements, on performing your duty well, on satisfying God’s will, on not proving unworthy of God’s six thousand years of waiting, His six thousand years of anticipation. Give God some comfort; let Him see some hope for you, and let His wishes be realized in you. Tell Me, would God mistreat you if you did so? Of course not! And even if the end results aren’t as one would have wished, how should they treat that fact, as a created being? They should submit in all things to God’s orchestrations and arrangements, without any personal agenda. Is this not the perspective created beings should take? (It is.) That’s the right mindset” (The Word, Vol. 6. On the Pursuit of the Truth I. Why Man Must Pursue the Truth). “The pursuit of the truth is a great matter of human life. No other matter is as important as pursuing the truth, and no other matter surpasses gaining the truth in value. Has it been easy, to follow God up until today? Hurry, and make your pursuit of the truth a matter of import! This stage of work in the last days is the most important stage of work God does on people in His six-thousand-year management plan. The pursuit of the truth is the highest expectation God places on His chosen people. He hopes that people walk the correct path, which is the pursuit of the truth” (The Word, Vol. 6. On the Pursuit of the Truth I. Why Man Must Pursue the Truth). I was really inspired when I read this, and really moved. God has told us all about His will, as well as what He requires and hopes for from people. He doesn’t care how high or low our caliber is, how old we are, or how many duties we’ve performed, He just cares whether we pursue the truth, are devoted in our faith, and are obedient. Just like in the Age of Grace, a widow offered up only two small coins and yet she gained the approval of God because she offered everything she had to Him. God saw her sincerity. Even though I’m old now and I can’t compare to young people in any aspect, I’m not negative. I want to forge ahead and seize every single day. While I still have my senses and reason, I really should be pursuing the truth more and reading God’s words more, practicing every little thing I understand, and doing my best in my duty. Then when I die, my heart will be at peace and I won’t let God down for sustaining me throughout my life. God allowed me to be born in the last days. I was able to accept His work of the last days at the age of 60, to witness God’s appearance, personally hear His voice, and experience the judgment and chastisement of His words; this was God’s enormous grace and blessing for me. If I were still living stuck within the sadness of old age, with no urgency to seize hold of this chance to pursue the truth, I would miss out on the chance to experience God’s work and be saved. If I wanted to pursue the truth later on, my chance would be gone, and it would be too late for regrets. So I prayed to God, “Oh God! I’m ready to repent. I don’t want to live in a state of negativity, anxiety, and misunderstanding anymore. I want to put Your words into practice, do my utmost to pursue the truth while I’m alive, and take the right path in life. I want to practice all that I understand from Your words, do my duty, and satisfy Your will. Whether I’m blessed or suffer misfortune, I’m ready to submit to Your rule and arrangements.”
From then on, I’ve focused on reading God’s words and pondering them more. I put everything I have into whatever duty the church needs me to perform. I’ve gained some experience and knowledge from my years as a believer, and I’ve practiced writing articles to bear witness to God. Especially now those preaching the gospel need good articles to resolve religious people’s notions, and as a long-standing man of faith, I’d like to write some, to do what I can to spread the kingdom gospel. And moreover, as I have a pretty arrogant disposition and tend to constrain my family because of my arrogance, I’ve been seeking the truth to resolve this aspect of my corruption, and to live out proper humanity before my family. In my usual interactions with brothers and sisters, when I see someone doing something that goes against principles, if I’m afraid of saying something that could offend them or give them a bad impression of me, I pray to God that I won’t live by satanic philosophies, and I focus on practicing the truth, upholding the interests of God’s house, and not just being a people-pleaser. Now I’m training myself to practice the truth in every little thing, and I feel very at peace and full of joy. Being able to come out from distress, anxiety, and concern, is entirely thanks to God’s guidance and grace. I’m truly grateful to God! All the glory be to Almighty God!