By Edwige, France

When I was in elementary school, there was a text that left a deep impression on me—the story of Kong Rong giving up pears. Kong Rong gave the biggest pears to his older and younger brothers, while he took the smallest, winning him the praise of his father. His story was recorded in the Three Character Classic. At that time, I really admired his moral conduct, and told myself to be a child like that as well. So, since childhood, if I had anything especially delicious or fun, although I really wanted it for myself, I would imitate Kong Rong and give it to my older and younger sisters, never fighting for it. My sisters liked me very much for this, and my elders praised me even more, telling other children to learn from me. This made me think that this was the kind of human quality that people should possess. After believing in God, this was also how I got along with my brothers and sisters. In both my duty and life, I never fought for things. In everything, I always put others first. Therefore, I was well-received among my brothers and sisters, and everyone said I was easy to get along with, not selfish, and considerate of others. I was very proud of myself for behaving this way, and I always thought my own humanity was good. Later, after being revealed by certain facts, I finally gained some understanding of my fallacious view.

In January 2022, due to the needs of gospel work, many new gospel and watering workers had to be found, so I was required to constantly seek watering staff suitable for cultivation. Sometimes, when I found brothers and sisters who were suitable for watering, the gospel staff had got to them one step ahead of me. This made me very unhappy, but I was too embarrassed to say it, because I thought everyone would think I was being selfish and competitive. So, I figured out a method. I deliberately sent a message to the watering deacon, telling him that the people suitable for watering were being taken away by the gospel workers. This caused the watering deacon to be prejudiced against gospel workers and made harmonious cooperation between them impossible. When an upper-level leader learned about this, she pruned me severely and exposed me for saying things to sow discord and for disrupting church work. Being pruned made me sad, but I didn’t reflect or know myself in any way.

Later, I heard that a sister named Lyse had good caliber and understanding, so was very suitable for watering work. I went to the church leader to ask for this sister to be transferred to water newcomers. But because people were urgently needed to preach the gospel, the church leader sent Lyse to perform that duty. When I heard the news, I felt very aggrieved, and wanted to speak to the church leader about it, but I thought, if I did this, my brothers and sisters would definitely think I was selfish and liked to fight for thing. I told myself, “No, I won’t do it. That way, I’ll look generous and good-natured.” I therefore suppressed my resentment, saying hypocritically that I was happy for Lyse, and that both watering work and gospel work were the work of the church. Soon after, I heard the church leader say, “Brother Jerome has good caliber and a pure understanding.” I wanted this brother to come water newcomers, but unexpectedly, the church leader said she had already sent him to be a gospel worker. I couldn’t take it anymore. Last time, she had asked Lyse to preach the gospel. Why did she assign Jerome to gospel work too? We needed people to do watering work. So, I told the church leader about the situation. After listening to me, she said, “Since he is needed more to do watering work, I’ll leave Jerome to you.” But I realized that since the church leader had already sent him to do gospel work, if I insisted on taking him, the gospel workers might say I was selfish and that I was insisting on taking good people. So, I decided to let him preach the gospel. This would show I had good humanity, that I wasn’t selfish, and could consider others. In the group, I messaged that Jerome would be a good gospel worker and sent a series of happy and celebratory emojis. Actually, all of that was pretend. I was in a terrible mood, and full of complaints. How could the leader think only gospel work needed good personnel? She didn’t see our actual difficulties. The more I thought, the more aggrieved I felt.

A few days later, something else happened—the leader asked us to report on recently cultivated personnel. I saw that the gospel workers were cultivating more people than we watering workers, and I couldn’t bear it anymore. Dissatisfaction and grievance instantly filled my mind. I didn’t expect that they were cultivating so many people. I had even let them have Lyse and Jerome. It was too unfair! Now, there were more gospel workers than watering workers. Thinking of the huge number of newcomers in the future, and how few watering staff we had, I felt a lot of pressure, as well as prejudice against my leader. It felt like she only thought about gospel work, and that there was no one thinking about watering work. The more I thought about it, the sadder I felt, and I couldn’t help crying. Watching the gospel deacon and church leader enthusiastically speak about the newcomers in the group, I felt like an outsider. I was so frustrated that I even wanted to leave the group. At noon that day, I was so miserable that I couldn’t eat. I lay in bed alone and sobbing; I felt that if I went on like this, I was bound to get sick. When a sister saw my state, she said I didn’t speak directly and disguised myself so that others would think I was magnanimous and look up to me. After my sister’s reminder, I finally started to reflect on myself. In God’s word, I read these passages: “Do you know what a Pharisee actually is? Are there any Pharisees around you? Why are these people called ‘Pharisees’? How are Pharisees described? They are people who are hypocritical, completely fake, and put on an act in everything they do. What act do they put on? They pretend to be good, kind, and positive. Is this what they are actually like? Absolutely not. Given that they are hypocrites, everything that is manifested and revealed in them is false; it is all pretense—it is not their true face. Where is their true face hidden? It is hidden deep within their hearts, never to be seen by others. Everything on the outside is an act, it is all fake, but they can only fool people; they cannot fool God. … To others, such people seem very devout and humble, but it is actually fake; they seem tolerant, forbearing, and loving, but it is actually a pretense; they say they love God, but it is actually an act. Others think such people holy, but it is actually fake. Where can a person who is truly holy be found? Human holiness is all fake. It is all an act, a pretense. On the outside, they appear loyal to God, but they are actually just performing for others to see. When no one is looking, they are not the slightest bit loyal, and everything they do is perfunctory. Superficially, they expend themselves for God and have given up their families and careers. But what are they doing in secret? They are conducting their own enterprise and running their own operation in the church, profiting from the church and stealing offerings secretly under the guise of working for God…. These people are the modern hypocritical Pharisees” (The Word, Vol. 3. The Discourses of Christ of the Last Days. Six Indicators of Life Growth). “If what you pursue is the truth, and what you practice is the truth, and the basis of your speech and actions is God’s words, the truth principles, and if others can profit and gain from you, would that not be of benefit to both of you? If living constrained by the thinking of traditional culture, you put on an act while others do the same, and you offer mannered niceties while they bow and scrape, each putting on an act for the other, then neither of you is any good. You and they bow and scrape and engage in niceties all day long, without a word of truth, embodying in life only good behavior as promoted by traditional culture. Though such behavior is conventional as seen from the outside, it is all hypocrisy, behavior that tricks and misleads others, behavior that takes people in and tricks them, without a sincere word to be heard. If you make friends with such a person, you are bound to be taken in and tricked in the end. There is nothing that would edify you to be gained from their good behavior. All it has to teach you is falsehood and trickery: You trick them, they trick you. What you will feel, ultimately, is an extreme degradation of your integrity and dignity, which you will just have to endure. You will still have to present yourself with courtesy, in a well-educated and sensible way, without quibbling with others or demanding too much of them. You will still have to be patient and tolerant, affecting nonchalance and broad-minded magnanimity with a beaming smile. How many years of effort it must take to achieve such a condition! If you demand of yourself that you live like this before others, will your life not exhaust you? To pretend to have so much love, knowing full well that you do not—such hypocrisy is no easy thing! You would feel ever more strongly the exhaustion of comporting yourself in this way as a person; you would rather be born as a cow or horse, a pig or dog in your next life than as a human being. You would find them just too false and evil” (The Word, Vol. 6. On the Pursuit of the Truth I. What It Means to Pursue the Truth (3)). God revealed that people live by hypocrisy based on traditional cultural ideas, which only brings pain, depression, and self-isolation. This was deeply stirring, because these ideas had harmed me deeply. Especially when I read: “To pretend to have so much love, knowing full well that you do not—such hypocrisy is no easy thing!” I felt very ashamed—these words described me. Obviously, I wasn’t very generous, but I pretended to be generous, and I didn’t consider church work, yet still pretended to consider it. When Lyse and Jerome were asked to preach the gospel, I’d obviously been very reluctant, but I’d forced a smile, and even sent a message saying I was happy they were preaching the gospel. I’d been so false and disguised! God’s word reveals that the Pharisees were hypocrites who always disguised themselves. Outwardly, they had good humanity, and were tolerant and patient, humble, and pious. In actual fact, they used these methods to mislead and ensnare people, to protect their status and positions. Their essence was hating the truth and God, which is why the Lord Jesus condemned them as snakes and declared woe unto them. As I contemplated these things, I felt afraid. My false pretenses were exactly like those of the Pharisees. In several staff appointments, I had shown that I wouldn’t fight with others, and I wanted to trade on this for the good appraisal of others. I said that I should put the church’s interests first in all matters, but what I was actually considering was my own image. I worried the gospel workers would say I was selfish, had poor humanity, and didn’t consider church work, so I had to restrain myself. Although I outwardly seemed generous and magnanimous, I was in great pain and had a great deal of resentment, and I even held a prejudice against the church leader and gospel deacon. But I hid these thoughts away where they couldn’t see, so my brothers and sisters would think I had good humanity and could uphold church work. I reflected on my intentions and what I’d revealed, and felt disgusted with my behavior. I had misled and drawn people in with my outward good deeds and established my own image—all I’d said and done was disgusting and hateful to God.

Later, I listened several times to God’s fellowship dissecting traditional culture and virtue, and started to reflect on myself and on the kind of traditional cultural ideas controlling me to live so hypocritically and so painfully. I read some of God’s words: “There is a story in traditional culture of Kong Rong giving up larger pears. What do you think: Is anyone who cannot be like Kong Rong not a good person? People used to think that whoever could be like Kong Rong was noble of character and firm of integrity, sacrificing their own interests for the sake of others—a good person. Is Kong Rong of this historic story a role model whom everyone has followed? Does the character have a certain place in people’s hearts? (Yes.) It is not his name, but his thoughts and practices, his morality and behavior, that occupy a place in people’s hearts. People esteem such practices and approve of them, and they inwardly admire Kong Rong’s moral conduct” (The Word, Vol. 6. On the Pursuit of the Truth I. What It Means to Pursue the Truth (10)). “The influence of traditional culture on intellectuals is particularly profound. Not only do they accept traditional culture, but they also accept many ideas and views from traditional culture into their hearts and treat them as positive things, even to the point of regarding some well-known sayings as mottos, and in doing so they embark down the wrong path in life. Traditional culture is represented by Confucianist doctrine. Confucianist doctrine has a whole set of ideological theories, it mainly promotes traditional moral culture, and it was revered by the ruling classes of dynasties throughout history, who venerated Confucius and Mencius as saints. Confucianist doctrine advocates that a person should uphold the values of benevolence, righteousness, propriety, wisdom, and trustworthiness, learn to first be calm, collected and forbearing whenever things happen, keep cool and talk things out, not fight over or scramble for things, and learn to be politely accommodating, and earn respect from everyone—this is comporting oneself with decorum. These intellectuals place themselves in a higher position than the hoi polloi, and in their eyes, all people are objects of their forbearance and tolerance. The ‘effects’ of knowledge are pretty great! These people greatly resemble fake gentlemen, do they not? People who acquire too much knowledge become fake gentlemen. If this group of refined scholars is described in one phrase, it is refined scholarly elegance. … They specialize in learning and imitating the refined elegance displayed by gentlemen. In what tone and way do they talk and discuss things together? Their facial expressions are especially gentle, and they speak politely and reservedly. They only express their own views and even if they know that others’ views are wrong, they don’t say anything. No one hurts anyone’s feelings, and their words are extremely soft, as if wrapped in cotton wool so they won’t hurt or irritate anyone, which makes one feel nauseous, anxious or angry just listening to them. The fact is that no one’s views are clear-cut, and no one gives in to anyone else. These kinds of people are so good at disguising. When encountering even the most trivial matter, they will disguise and enshroud themselves, and none of them will give a clear explanation. In front of ordinary people, what kind of posture do they want to adopt, and what kind of image do they want to put on? Namely, to let ordinary people see that they are modest gentlemen. Gentlemen are a cut above others and are objects of people’s veneration. People think that they have greater insights than average people, and that they have a better understanding of things compared with average people, so everyone consults them whenever they have an issue. This is exactly the outcome that these intellectuals want, they all hope to be venerated as saints” (The Word, Vol. 4. Exposing Antichrists. Item Nine (Part One)). God’s word precisely described my problem. Why could I view these hypocritical good deeds as positive things to emulate? It was because I had been influenced by the traditional cultural idea of Kong Rong giving up bigger pears. I had lived by this idea since I was a child. To make people think I was a good child, I’d given a lot of my favorite toys and snacks to my sisters. When I grew up, I also showed generosity in all things. Although I did so reluctantly, I thought only such a person was possessing good humanity and understanding manners, and that this was the only way to gain the admiration and respect of others, so I reluctantly endured. After I believed in God, I still practiced this traditional notion as the truth. In the matter of these two staff appointments, I had simply forborne. There was clearly a shortage of watering staff, but I’d put on a mask of selflessness and allowed two people suitable for watering to preach the gospel instead. This had made me appear very noble and generous, but actually, I was so negative that I cried several times in secret because of the lack of staff. I had harbored prejudice against the church leader, and ultimately, the watering work had been delayed. What was the point of “giving” like that? For the sake of my good image, I’d adopted a noble posture like Kong Rong, and I hadn’t cared if it delayed church work. I was an authentic hypocrite. If I’d really been concerned with church work, I would have evaluated our need for staff by the actual demands of watering work, but to protect my image, I hadn’t followed principles at all. Even when watering work had been affected by the lack of staff, I had still insisted on “generously” letting people go. I had earned the praise of others at the cost of delaying watering work. No wonder God says such people are hypocrites. I realized my behavior had been really false.

Later, I read some of God’s words that stirred me. Almighty God says: “You must know clearly that any sort of saying about moral conduct is not the truth, much less can it stand in for the truth. They are not even positive things. So what exactly are they? It may be said with certainty that these sayings on moral conduct are heretical fallacies with which Satan misleads people. They are not in themselves the truth reality that people should possess, nor are they positive things that normal humanity ought to live out. These sayings on moral conduct constitute counterfeits, pretenses, falsifications, and tricks—they are factitious behaviors, and do not at all originate in man’s conscience and reason or in their normal thinking. Therefore, all of traditional culture’s sayings regarding moral conduct are preposterous, absurd heresies and fallacies. With these few fellowships, the sayings Satan puts forth about moral conduct have on this day been condemned, in their entirety, to death. If they are not even positive things, how is it that people can accept them? How can people live by these ideas and views? The reason is that these sayings on moral conduct align so well with people’s notions and imaginings. They evoke admiration and approval, so people accept these sayings on moral conduct into their hearts, and though they cannot put them into practice, inwardly, they embrace and worship them with gusto. And thus, Satan uses various sayings on moral conduct to mislead people, to control their hearts and their behavior, for in their hearts, people worship and have a blind belief in all sorts of sayings on moral conduct, and they would all like to use these claims to affect greater dignity, nobility, and kindness, thereby achieving their goal of being highly regarded and praised. All the various sayings on moral conduct, in brief, ask that when people do a certain kind of thing, they should demonstrate some sort of behavior or human quality in the realm of moral conduct. These behaviors and human qualities seem quite noble, and they are revered, so all people, in their hearts, very much aspire toward them. But what they have not considered is that these sayings about moral conduct are not at all the principles of comportment that a normal person should follow; instead, they are a variety of hypocritical behaviors that one may affect. They are deviations from the standards of conscience and reason, departures from the will of normal humanity. Satan uses false and pretended sayings on moral conduct to mislead people, to make them worship it and those hypocritical so-called sages, thereby causing people to see normal humanity and the criteria for human comportment as ordinary, simple, and even lowly things. People despise those things and think them beneath contempt. This is because the sayings on moral conduct espoused by Satan are so pleasing to the eye and so aligned with man’s notions and imaginings. The fact is, though, that no saying on moral conduct, whatever it may be, is a principle that people should follow in their comportment or their dealings in the world. Mull it over—is this not so? In essence, sayings on moral conduct are just demands that people superficially live more dignified, noble lives, enabling them to have others worship or praise them, rather than look down on them. The essence of these sayings shows that they are just demands that people demonstrate good moral conduct through good behavior, thus covering and restraining the ambitions and extravagant desires of corrupt humanity, covering up man’s evil and hideous nature essence, as well as the manifestations of various corrupt dispositions. They are meant to enhance a person’s personality through superficially good behavior and practices, to enhance the image others have of them and the wider world’s estimation of them. These points show that sayings on moral conduct are about covering up man’s inner thoughts, views, aims and intentions, their hideous countenance, and their nature essence with superficial behavior and practices. Can these things be covered up successfully? Does trying to cover them up not make them all the more apparent? But Satan does not care about that. Its purpose is to cover up the hideous countenance of corrupt humanity, to cover up the truth of man’s corruption. So, Satan has people adopt the behavioral manifestations of moral conduct to disguise themselves, which means that it uses the rules and behaviors of moral conduct to make a neat package of man’s appearance, enhancing a person’s human qualities and personality so that they can have others esteem and praise them. Basically, these sayings on moral conduct determine whether a person is noble or lowly on the basis of their behavioral manifestations and moral standards” (The Word, Vol. 6. On the Pursuit of the Truth I. What It Means to Pursue the Truth (10)). Only after reading God’s words did I understand I had always held a fallacious view, which was that I treated the virtues of traditional culture as a standard to measure whether a person’s humanity was good or bad. I mistakenly viewed virtue as truth, thinking people with virtue had good humanity. Actually, virtue is not the life principle people should follow. It is an act of hypocrisy, and in essence it is a tactic and method that Satan uses to mislead and corrupt people. Satan uses traditional culture to instill moral standards for people to live by. They can thereby use outward good deeds to disguise themselves and hide their inner corruption and ugliness as a means to win others’ high regard—as a result, people become ever more hypocritical and deceitful. I saw that I was also this way. I considered the virtues of traditional culture as the criterion for my actions. Although it looked like I didn’t vie with others, and could get along with them, actually, I was forcing myself to do good deeds to make people say I was good, and to maintain my image in their hearts. But I said I was considering the work of the church. I was so deceitful!

Later, I read in God’s word: “A person who understands the truth should dissect the various claims and demands of traditional culture regarding moral conduct. You should dissect which of them you cherish the most, and always cling to, that always serves as the basis and criterion for how you view people and things, and how you comport yourself and act. Then, you should hold the things that you cling to against God’s words and requirements for comparison, and look at whether these aspects of traditional culture oppose or conflict with the truths that God expresses. If you truly do find a problem, you must dissect at once where it is, exactly, that these aspects of traditional culture are wrong and absurd. When you are clear on these issues, you will know what is the truth and what is fallacy; you will have a path of practice, and you will be able to choose the path you should walk. Seek the truth in this way, and you will be able to mend your ways” (The Word, Vol. 6. On the Pursuit of the Truth I. What It Means to Pursue the Truth (5)). From God’s word I understood that if you don’t want to live by these traditional ideas, you first need to discern and dissect these things, uncover their errors and absurdities, where they violate the truth, and what consequences living by them brings about. Only when you see these things clearly can you give them up and accept the truth. I started to wonder: Does the “giving” in Kong Rong giving up bigger pears conform to the truth principles? Is this “giving” one of God’s requirements for normal humanity? Are those who forbear in everything really good people? My own blind forbearance had caused a serious staff shortage in watering work. To show generosity and forbear in all things, I had told many hypocritical lies. Being educated with these traditional ideas, instead of making me a good person, had made me hypocritical and deceitful. When I gained the high regard of others, I hadn’t been happy—instead I’d become more and more depressed and miserable. These were the consequences of worshiping traditional culture. Without God to reveal the essence of traditional culture, I would have been blinded all my life. I couldn’t stop thanking God for expressing the truth and dissecting these traditional ideas, enabling me to awaken.

After that, I thought, “Since Kong Rong’s virtue of giving up bigger pears was only outward good behavior, and didn’t mean he had good humanity, what is genuinely good humanity?” In God’s word, I read: “There must be a standard for having good humanity. It does not involve taking the path of moderation, not sticking to principles, endeavoring not to offend anyone, currying favor everywhere you go, being smooth and slick with everyone you meet, and making everyone speak well of you. This is not the standard. So, what is the standard? It is being able to submit to God and the truth. It is approaching one’s duty and all manner of people, events, and things with principles and a sense of responsibility. This is plain for all to see; everyone is clear about this in their heart. Moreover, God scrutinizes people’s hearts and knows their situation, each and every one; no matter who they are, no one can fool God. Some people always boast that they possess good humanity, that they never speak ill of others, never harm anyone else’s interests, and they claim never to have coveted other people’s property. When there is a dispute over interests, they even prefer to suffer loss than take advantage of others, and everyone else thinks they are good people. However, when performing their duties in God’s house, they are wily and slippery, always scheming for themselves. Never do they think of the interests of God’s house, never do they treat as urgent the things God treats as urgent or think as God thinks, and never can they set aside their own interests so as to perform their duties. They never forsake their own interests. Even when they see evil people committing evil, they do not expose them; they have no principles whatsoever. What kind of humanity is this? It is not good humanity. Pay no attention to what such people say; you must see what they live out, what they reveal, and what their attitude is when they perform their duties, as well as what their internal state is and what they love. If their love of their own fame and gain exceeds their loyalty to God, if their love of their own fame and gain exceeds the interests of God’s house, or if their love of their own fame and gain exceeds the consideration they show for God, then are such people possessed of humanity? They are not people with humanity. Their behavior can be seen by others and by God. It is very difficult for such people to gain the truth” (The Word, Vol. 3. The Discourses of Christ of the Last Days. In Giving One’s Heart to God, One Can Obtain the Truth). From God’s word, I understood a person with truly good humanity loves the truth and positive things, is responsible in their duties, sticks to the truth principles, and upholds the work of the church. Those who outwardly offend no one, forbear blindly and without principle, and who would rather suffer loss themselves than take advantage of others, although they outwardly have good character, in their duties, they always seek to protect their own interests, never practice the truth, and never consider the work of the church. Such people do not have good humanity whatsoever. I didn’t want to live by traditional culture and be a superficially good person anymore. I wanted to live out a human likeness according to God’s requirements.

As I read God’s word, I found a path of practice. God says: “You must seek the truth to resolve any problem that arises, no matter what it is, and by no means disguise yourself or put on a false face for others. Your shortcomings, your deficiencies, your faults, your corrupt dispositions—be completely open about them all, and fellowship about them all. Do not keep them inside. Learning how to open yourself up is the first step toward life entry, and it is the first hurdle, which is the most difficult to overcome. Once you have overcome it, entering the truth is easy. What does taking this step signify? It means that you are opening your heart and showing everything you have, good or bad, positive or negative; baring yourself for others and for God to see; hiding nothing from God, concealing nothing, disguising nothing, free of deceit and trickery, and being likewise open and honest with other people. In this way, you live in the light, and not only will God scrutinize you, but other people will also be able to see that you act with principle and a degree of transparency. You do not need to use any methods to protect your reputation, image, and status, nor do you need to cover up or disguise your mistakes. You do not need to engage in these useless efforts. If you can let these things go, you will be very relaxed, you will live without constraints or pain, and you will live entirely in the light” (The Word, Vol. 3. The Discourses of Christ of the Last Days. Part Three). From God’s word, I understood I shouldn’t disguise myself to give others a false image. Instead, I should be an honest, simple, and open person, and I should open up and communicate about any problems or difficulties I had, so that my brothers and sisters can better help me. When I didn’t speak up, when I just blindly bore things and disguised myself, everyone believed there was no shortage of watering staff and thought the work was going well. Actually, however, I was suffering, and church work was being harmed. So, I consciously practiced according to God’s word and communicated difficulties clearly with my brothers and sisters. After that, they all provided some personnel capable of doing the watering work. This made me see how easy and enjoyable it is to practice according to God’s word. Living by traditional culture, we only become more and more corrupted, more and more false and deceitful, and more and more miserable. Only practicing the truth lets us live out a human likeness, become genuinely good people, and experience real peace and joy. Thank God!