8. Reflections on Pursuing Good Luck
At the end of 2022, I began my duty as a preacher and became responsible for following up on the work of several churches. One day, I received a letter from the upper-level leader, saying that the states of the two leaders in one church were poor and that it had already affected the various items of church work. She asked me to quickly go there to understand the situation and resolve it through fellowship. I thought to myself, “Recently, this church experienced a campaign of arrests by the Communist Party, many brothers and sisters are facing security risks and cannot do their duties normally. It’s understandable that the two leaders are a bit negative due to this difficulty. If I just find some of God’s words and fellowship with them, I should be able to resolve this problem.” When I saw the two leaders, their states were terrible. They said that the lack of results in the church’s various items of work was caused by their failure to perform actual work, and they were so negative that they wanted to resign. I immediately fellowshipped with them, saying, “This environment is allowed by God. We cannot be stuck in a state of negativity. The most crucial thing now is how we can work together to shoulder our duties and not delay the church’s work.” But no matter how I fellowshipped, the two sisters remained trapped in their negative states, saying that their calibers were poor, that they didn’t pursue the truth, and that they couldn’t do leadership work. Faced with such a situation, I thought, “Why am I so unlucky? I just started being a preacher, and I’m assigned to this church where the leaders are too negative to take responsibility. Doesn’t this mean all the work will fall on my shoulders?” At that time, I was simultaneously fellowshipping with the church leaders to resolve their states and going to various gatherings to implement some work. I was busy to the point of exhaustion every day. Later, one of the leaders ended up resigning. The other leader was betrayed by a Judas and had to temporarily hide to avoid being arrested, so she was unable to go out to do her duty. Hearing this news, I couldn’t help but sigh deeply, thinking, “There are so many issues in this church; the two leaders can’t even do their duties. All the work falls on me alone. How long will I be busy with all this?” During those days, I was like a spinning top, unable to stop moving. Sometimes, I met with brothers and sisters during the day to get an understanding of the work, and when I returned at night, there would be a pile of letters to reply to. I stayed busy until it got late every night and still couldn’t complete all the tasks. Facing this series of problems and difficulties, I was burnt out, feeling mentally and physically drained. It felt like a stone was lodged in my chest, making it hard to breathe. I thought, “Ever since being assigned to this church, I’ve encountered a series of unfavorable events. New problems arise before the old ones are resolved. Now there’s not even a church leader. I’m like a lone commander, with no one to consult on things, having to handle all the work myself. Meanwhile, the other preacher is responsible for churches with three leaders. Although there are many tasks, each person does a bit, so he’s not as exhausted as I am. Why does he have such good luck? And why was I assigned to a church like this? I’m so unlucky!” The more I thought about it, the more aggrieved I felt, always feeling that I was unlucky to be assigned to that church. Although I appeared to be doing my duty normally every day, I felt dispirited and even wanted to escape this environment.
While living in this incorrect state of despondency and resistance, one day, I watched a testimony video with a passage of God’s words that touched me deeply. Almighty God says: “What is the problem with people who always think that they are unlucky? They always use the standard of luck to measure whether their actions are right or wrong, and to weigh up which path they should take, the things that they should experience, and any problems that they face. Is that right or wrong? (Wrong.) They describe bad things as unlucky and good things as lucky or advantageous. Is this perspective right or wrong? (Wrong.) Measuring things from this kind of perspective is wrong. It is an extreme and incorrect method and standard for measuring things. This kind of method often leads people to sink into depression, and it often makes them feel uneasy, and that nothing ever goes their way, and that they never get what they want, which eventually leads them to feel constantly anxious, irritable, and uneasy. When these negative emotions go unresolved, these people constantly sink into depression and feel that God does not favor them. They think that God treats others with grace but not them, and that God takes care of others but not them. ‘Why do I always feel uneasy and anxious? Why do bad things always happen to me? Why do good things never come my way? Just once is all I’m asking for!’ When you view things with this kind of erroneous way of thinking and perspective, you will fall into the trap of good and bad luck. When you are continually falling into this trap, you will constantly feel depressed. In the midst of this depression, you will be particularly sensitive to whether the things that befall you are lucky or unlucky. When this happens, it proves that this perspective and idea of good and bad luck has taken control of you. When you are controlled by this kind of perspective, your views and attitude toward people, events, and things are no longer within the range of the conscience and reason of normal humanity, but have fallen into a sort of extreme. When you fall into this extreme, you will not emerge from your depression. You will keep getting depressed time and time again, and even if you do not normally feel depressed, as soon as something goes wrong, as soon as you feel that something unlucky has happened, you will immediately sink into depression. This depression will affect your normal judgment and decision-making, and even your happiness, anger, sorrow, and joy. When it affects your happiness, anger, sorrow, and joy, it will disturb and destroy the performance of your duty, as well as your will and desire to follow God. When these positive things are destroyed, the few truths you have come to understand will vanish into thin air and be of no help to you at all” (The Word, Vol. 6. On the Pursuit of the Truth I. How to Pursue the Truth (2)). God’s words exposed my exact state. In my view, doing my duty smoothly without any difficulties and having everything go well was good luck. When I encountered some difficulties or problems in my duty, I felt I was unfortunate and unlucky, and I immediately fell into a despondent mood. For instance, when I came to this church and saw that both leaders were so negative that they wanted to resign and that there were a series of difficulties and problems in the church’s work, I didn’t accept it from God and seek His intention or think about how to put all my energy into shouldering the work. Instead, I fell into despondency, thinking it was bad luck for me to encounter these difficulties. In particular, when neither leader could do the work later on, and when I thought about the area the other preacher was supervising where the leaders and workers were all in place and the work progressed smoothly, I particularly envied him and thought he was lucky, whereas I was unlucky and encountered all the bad things. When I looked at things from this wrong perspective, I kept sinking into despondency and resistance, having no energy in my duty and even wanting to escape from this environment. But in reality, all the environments I face are laid out by God. God’s intention is for me to seek the truth, rely on God, and experience this environment in a practical way. Even when there are difficulties, I should still pray to God and seek the truth to resolve them, shouldering the duties I can handle. But I hadn’t thought about how to experience God’s work and understand His sovereignty and orchestrations in such an environment. When faced with unsatisfactory things, I thought I was unfortunate and had bad luck, living in a despondent mood and resisting God’s sovereignty. How could I learn lessons this way? How could I understand God’s deeds? I couldn’t help but think of those who don’t believe in God. They never accept things from God, don’t submit to God’s sovereignty and arrangements, and blame everyone but themselves when things aren’t to their liking. They live their whole lives without knowing God. As for me, even though I believed in God and said that God holds sovereignty over everything, I still judged everything according to the viewpoints of nonbelievers. Isn’t this the behavior of a veritable disbeliever?
I read more of God’s words that say: “These people who are always concerned about whether they have good or bad luck—is the way that they view things correct? Does good luck or bad luck exist? (No.) What is the basis for saying that it does not exist? (The people we meet and the things that happen to us every day are determined by God’s sovereignty and arrangements. There is no such thing as good luck or bad luck; everything happens out of necessity and has meaning behind it.) Is that correct? (It is.) This view is correct, and this is the theoretical basis for saying that luck does not exist. Whatever happens to you, whether good or bad, it is all normal, just like the weather through the four seasons—not every day can be sunny. You cannot say that sunny days are arranged by God, whereas cloudy days, rain, wind, and storms are not. Everything is determined by God’s sovereignty and arrangements, and is generated by the natural environment. This natural environment arises according to the laws and rules that God arranged and established. All of this is necessary and imperative, so no matter what the weather, it is generated and brought about by natural laws. There is nothing good or bad in it—only people’s feelings about it are good or bad. … The fact is that whether a person feels good or bad about something is based on their own selfish motives, desires, and self-interest, rather than on the essence of the thing itself. So, the basis on which people gauge whether something is good or bad is inaccurate. Because the basis is inaccurate, the final conclusions that they draw are also inaccurate. Returning to the subject of good luck and bad luck, now everyone knows that this saying of luck does not hold water, and that it is neither good nor bad. The people, events, and things that you encounter, whether good or bad, are all determined by God’s sovereignty and arrangements, so you should face them properly. Accept what is good from God, and accept what is bad from God as well. Do not say that you’re lucky when good things happen, and that you’re unlucky when bad things happen. It can only be said that there are lessons for people to learn within all these things, and they should not reject or avoid them. Thank God for the good things, but also thank God for the bad things, because all of them are arranged by Him. Good people, events, things, and environments provide lessons that they should learn, but there is even more to be learned from bad people, events, things, and environments. These are all experiences and episodes that should be part of one’s life. People should not use the idea of luck to measure them” (The Word, Vol. 6. On the Pursuit of the Truth I. How to Pursue the Truth (2)). “If you give up on the idea of how lucky or unlucky you are, and treat these things calmly and correctly, you will find that most things are not so unfavorable or difficult to deal with. When you let go of your ambitions and desires, when you stop rejecting or avoiding whatever misfortune befalls you, and you stop measuring such things by how lucky or unlucky you are, many of the things that you used to see as unfortunate and bad, you will now think of as good—the bad things will turn into good things. Your mentality and the way that you view things will change, which will enable you to feel differently about your life experiences, and at the same time reap different rewards. This is an extraordinary experience, one which will bring you unimagined rewards. It is a good thing, not a bad thing” (The Word, Vol. 6. On the Pursuit of the Truth I. How to Pursue the Truth (2)). God’s words enlightened me. Actually, there is no such thing as good or bad luck. Everything that happens to me, regardless of whether it’s in line with my notions on the surface, is orchestrated by God and is bound to happen, and is also a necessary experience in my life. God arranges these things to teach me lessons. As long as I focus on seeking the truth, I will gain something; what seems bad to people can turn into something good. For example, when Job faced Satan’s temptations, he lost his great wealth, his children were crushed to death, and he himself was covered in boils. From a human perspective, the series of events that Job encountered seemed very unfortunate and unlucky. However, from God’s perspective, He allowed Job to face these temptations to give him a chance to testify to God, proving to Satan that Job was a righteous man who feared God and shunned evil, which prevented Satan from accusing or attacking him further. Job, with his faith in and fear of God, stood firm in his testimony during these trials and gained God’s approval. This was such a meaningful thing! Through Job’s experience, we can see that there is no such thing as good or bad luck, and that everything that happens is due to God’s sovereignty and orchestrations, designed to teach us different lessons amidst various environments. However, I didn’t recognize God’s sovereignty and always measured everything that happened to me based on luck. This was because I was too considerate of my flesh, always wanting to do my duties smoothly without having my flesh suffer. As long as it benefited my flesh and I didn’t have to suffer, I felt that I was lucky. Conversely, if I encountered some difficulties and problems and needed to suffer and pay a price, I felt that I was unlucky and often complained in my heart. My view on judging things was too distorted! The series of difficulties and problems that I now faced were seemingly unfavorable on the surface, but God had used these difficulties to teach me to rely on Him, seek the truth, rebel against my flesh, and learn some lessons. In the past, when I was doing my duty in a comfortable environment and just following the same routine every day, it seemed easy on the surface, but I gained very little. I didn’t understand many truth principles, and my life growth was slow, whereas now, this current environment was beneficial to my life. Understanding God’s intention, I felt much more relieved, no longer dwelling in despondency and resistance. I was willing to submit to the environment God had laid out for me and experience God’s work in a practical way. Afterward, I started to do my duty earnestly, implementing the work according to the requirements of God’s house. After a period of time, some of the church’s work began to recover gradually. I became more familiar with the personnel and the various items of work, and I understood the principles of work better than before, gaining some confidence. Only then did I experience firsthand God’s thoughtfulness in laying out these environments. I saw that by not judging the surrounding people, events, and things from the perspective of good or bad luck and accepting everything from God and seeking the truth, I didn’t feel tired in my duty. Instead, I felt fulfilled and at peace.
After one gathering, the leader arranged for me to handle something at a church. I originally planned to finish it in one day and then proceed to another church to implement work, but unexpectedly, as soon as I arrived at this church, the church supervisor nervously told me, “Something happened. Many brothers and sisters were arrested yesterday.” After hearing his account, I realized that those arrested were almost all leaders and workers, meaning that now it would be nearly impossible to carry out any church work normally. The church leaders also had to hide themselves due to their contact with those people and couldn’t go out to do their duties. Right after that, I received a letter from the upper-level leader instructing me to stay at this church temporarily to handle the aftermath of the arrests. At first, I was able to accept this from God and submit. At that time, there were many security risks for various host families and brothers and sisters, and many church tasks needed to be handled. I was busy all day, and when I returned to my host home at night, I had to respond to letters from other churches. I needed to stay up late nearly every night. The environment was also harsh, and almost every day, I received letters saying that more brothers and sisters had been arrested. Every time I went out, my heart was in my throat, not knowing if I would return safely this time. Some time passed, and I felt physically and mentally exhausted. Seeing that two leaders around me were just responding to letters and doing some work at home, whereas I was always running about, moving around constantly like a spinning top with more things to do than I had time for, and my nerves were stretched tight, I thought to myself, “The duties they do are so easy. They don’t have to worry or run around. Unlike me, I don’t even get any chances to rest. Why do I always get caught up dealing with church arrests? I’m so unlucky! Why do these things keep happening to me one after the other?” Although I didn’t dare to complain openly, deep down, I was very resistant, and I was always resigned and unwilling when doing my duty. While I was dwelling in this wrong state, I couldn’t help but think back to my previous experiences, and I was vaguely aware that this environment was laid out for me by God so that I could learn a lesson. I prayed to God, “Oh God, when things happen to me, I still involuntarily view them from the perspective of good or bad luck and still feel it’s because of my bad luck and misfortune that they happen. I can’t truly understand Your intention. Oh God, please enlighten and guide me so that I can learn to experience amidst this environment.”
Afterward, I consciously searched for God’s words to read, wanting to understand what exactly was wrong with always pursuing good luck. I read this passage in God’s words: “What are the thoughts and perspectives of people who use luck to measure whether things are good or bad? What is the essence of such people? Why do they pay so much attention to good luck and bad luck? Do people who focus a lot on luck hope that their luck is good, or do they hope that it is bad? (They hope that it is good.) That is right. In fact, they pursue good luck and for good things to happen to them, and they just take advantage of them and profit from them. They do not care how much others suffer, or how many hardships or difficulties others have to endure. They do not want anything that they perceive as unlucky to happen to them. In other words, they do not want any bad things to happen to them: no setbacks, no failures or embarrassments, no being pruned, no losing things, no losing out, and no being deceived. If any of that happens, they regard it as bad luck. No matter who arranges it, if bad things happen, it is unlucky. They hope that all good things—from being promoted, standing out from the crowd, and benefiting at others’ expense, to profiting from something, making lots of money, or becoming a high-ranking official—happen to them, and they think that is good luck. They always measure the people, events, and things that they encounter based on luck. They are pursuing good luck, not bad luck. As soon as the slightest thing goes wrong, they get angry, annoyed, and dissatisfied. To put it bluntly, these types of people are selfish. They pursue benefiting themselves at other people’s expense, making a profit for themselves, coming out on top, and standing out from the crowd. They would be satisfied if every good thing happened to them alone. This is their nature essence; it is their true face” (The Word, Vol. 6. On the Pursuit of the Truth I. How to Pursue the Truth (2)). God’s words made me feel very ashamed. It turned out that my constant pursuit of good luck and avoidance of any difficulties or adversity was actually due to my selfish nature. I adhered to a philosophy of worldly dealings of “Never take the short end of the stick,” always putting my own interests first. I always wanted all the good things to happen to me, for everything to go smoothly without having to endure any hardship; that’s what would make me happy. Once I encountered setbacks or difficulties that touched upon my fleshly interests and required me to suffer, I started to complain and get irritated, losing my balance completely. Before believing in God, when I saw colleagues who came from good backgrounds, with family members who had stable jobs and nice houses, while I lived in poverty without even a house of my own and with family members at home unemployed and needing me to support them, I felt very unbalanced. I thought it was my bad luck to have such a family, and I was especially envious and jealous of my colleagues. I always felt that good things only happened to others, that I was just an unlucky person. Reflecting on this recent period of time, when these two churches I was responsible for were faced with the CCP’s arrests, it required me to suffer and pay a price and touched upon my fleshly interests, so I began to complain about everything and blame my bad luck and misfortune. Not only did I not think of proactively doing my duty well, but I also became despondent and resistant, complaining that God kept laying out such environments for me. My pursuit of good luck was essentially to satisfy my fleshly interests; I wished for all good things to come to me and always wanted to profit at others’ expense. As for the tasks that required taking risks and suffering, I thought they should all be undertaken by others. As long as I could be comfortable and my flesh could gain benefits, I would be satisfied. I truly was so selfish! On the surface, it seemed like I was doing my duty in God’s house, but my heart considered my fleshly interests rather than the church’s work and God’s eager intentions. This was detestable and loathsome to God, and doing my duty in this way, I would ultimately not gain His approval.
Later, I read more of God’s words that say: “Is it easy to get out of this depression? In fact, it is easy. Just let go of your erroneous perspectives, do not expect everything to go well, or exactly the way you want it to, or smoothly. Do not fear, resist, or reject things that go wrong. Instead, let go of your resistance, calm down, and come before God with an attitude of submission, and accept all that God arranges. Do not pursue so-called ‘good luck,’ and do not reject so-called ‘bad luck.’ Give your heart and your whole being to God, let Him do the acting and orchestrating, and submit to His orchestrations and arrangements. God will give you what you need in just measure when you need it. He will orchestrate the environments, people, events, and things that you require, according to your needs and deficiencies, so that you can learn the lessons that you ought to be learning from the people, events, and things that you come across. Of course, the prerequisite to all this is that you must have a mentality of submission toward God’s orchestrations and arrangements. So, do not pursue perfection; do not reject or fear the occurrence of undesirable, embarrassing, or unfavorable things; and do not use your depression to inwardly resist the occurrence of bad things” (The Word, Vol. 6. On the Pursuit of the Truth I. How to Pursue the Truth (2)). From God’s words, I understood His intention. The environments God laid out for me were all good and were all meant to teach me lessons. I should not pursue this so-called good luck and always want to do my duty in a comfortable environment any longer. Continuing like that would only lead to fruitless labor. Instead, I ought to learn to submit to the environments God laid out, and whether favorable or unfavorable, I should seek the truth from them, focusing on reflecting on the corrupt dispositions I revealed and rebelling against the flesh and acting according to God’s requirements. This is what aligns with God’s intention. Now, brothers and sisters were being arrested, there were security risks for the two church leaders, and some work couldn’t be done. As a leader, I ought to fulfill my responsibility at this critical moment. Although handling the church work would be difficult and involve some fleshly suffering, as long as it benefited the church’s work, I should do my best to cooperate. Understanding this, I no longer lived in negativity, and I understood from my heart that this was my duty, that it was the responsibility I ought to fulfill. After that, while doing my duty, I actively fellowshipped to resolve any issues or deviations in the church’s work. If I encountered problems that I couldn’t understand, I discussed them with the two leaders so that they could promptly grasp them, and then we would seek the principles to resolve them. By practicing this way, although I was busy every day, as long as I arranged things reasonably, I could manage it and didn’t find it unbearable or difficult.
One day, the upper-level leader sent a letter asking us to quickly organize a set of materials on cleansing and expelling, emphasizing that it was fairly urgent and needed to be collected and organized by people without security risks. Reading this letter, I knew it was most suitable for me to do it. But thinking that I’d have to verify with so many brothers and sisters and would definitely be running around every day, I couldn’t help but start having the same old thoughts, “Ugh, the leader clearly asked for someone without security risks, so I can’t avoid it even if I wanted to. Having to hurry back and forth like this, who knows how long it’ll take to collect and verify these materials.” I felt that I was unlucky. When I had this thought, I remembered God’s words that said: “Do not always do things for your own sake and do not constantly consider your own interests; do not consider the interests of man, and give no thought to your own pride, reputation, and status. You must first consider the interests of God’s house, and make them your priority. You should be considerate of God’s intentions and begin by contemplating whether or not there have been impurities in the performance of your duty, whether you have been loyal, fulfilled your responsibilities, and given it your all, as well as whether or not you have been wholeheartedly thinking about your duty and the work of the church. You must consider these things” (The Word, Vol. 3. The Discourses of Christ of the Last Days. Freedom and Liberation Can Be Gained Only by Casting Off One’s Corrupt Disposition). God’s words brightened my heart. No matter what duty I was faced with, it contained God’s intentions. In particular, since this work was so important, wasn’t the opportunity to do this work an exaltation from God? Yet, when facing a duty, the first thing I considered was that my flesh would have to suffer again, and I thought that I was unlucky. I was truly too selfish! I ought to prioritize the church’s work rather than thinking first about those fleshly difficulties and do my best to rely on God and cooperate. With this realization, I no longer resisted this duty so much, and I discussed with the church leaders on how to find people to verify the materials. During the verification process, I encountered some difficulties, but I accepted them from God and no longer complained, while also reviewing the deviations and relying on God to continue to cooperate. Eventually, the materials were successfully collected. I sincerely thanked God for His guidance!
Through this experience, I gained some understanding of the erroneous view of pursuing good luck and saw that behind this pursuit lies a corrupt disposition that is selfish and despicable. In fact, all the environments God lays out for me, whether I see them as good or bad, are laid out based on my stature and needs. They are meant to help me seek the truth, recognize my corrupt disposition, and learn lessons from these environments. There is God’s wisdom and painstaking intention in them. In the future, I don’t want to keep judging all people, events, and things I encounter with a view that is based on luck. I want to learn to submit to the environments God lays out and experience God’s work.