By Li Yang, China

In late October 2020, I was dismissed from my role as a leader for failing to do real work and I went back to my local church. Due to the CCP’s arrest, there were some safety issues at my home, so I was temporarily unable to attend gatherings. I was feeling really negative and weak. A sister named Li Yan who lived in my village was a leader in another church. Though I wasn’t a member of the church she oversaw, she would ask about my state whenever we met and read God’s words to help me. I was really grateful to her because she did not look down on me for being dismissed as a false leader and even helped me out. I thought, “If she has any problems in the future, I will help her as best I can.”

A few months later, I took over cleansing work in the church and worked with Li Yan a lot. I noticed that she was often late for gatherings due to personal matters and during gatherings she just went through the motions and rarely fellowshipped God’s words. When brothers and sisters couldn’t discern disbelievers, antichrists or evil people, she didn’t fellowship with them on the truth principles. I also heard from a church deacon that she’d often get into spats with her partnered sister over the smallest issues, which meant gatherings couldn’t go ahead normally. Hearing this made me pretty angry. I thought that as a leader, Li Yan had not only failed to do real work, but was also disturbing church life, and that this would delay the others’ life entry and the church’s work. I sought her out to fellowship with her and to point out she wasn’t doing real work. I also warned her that if she continued on like this, she’d become a false leader. But she didn’t seem to care at all, and said, “Fine then, I’m a false leader. Since I’m not fellowshipping the truth with them, why don’t you?” After that, I noticed that a few church members were spreading negativity and disturbing church life a lot. I asked Li Yan to get a sense of everyone’s assessment of them to see if they were disbelievers and should be cleared out. But she made an excuse, saying she was busy, and kept putting it off, which allowed those church members to continue disturbing church life. Seeing how careless of an attitude she had toward church work, I pointed out her problems to her again, but she still argued back. I realized that Li Yan continually failed to do real work, didn’t accept fellowship and guidance, and had already delayed the church’s work. Judging by principles, I thought she was very likely a false leader and so I wanted to report her situation to the upper leaders. But then I thought, “She helped me before when I was feeling negative and treated me so well. If she finds out that I reported her to the upper leaders, will she become biased against me? If that leads to her being dismissed, will she say I lack a conscience? Perhaps if I don’t report her now and just fellowship a bit more, she’ll change.” So, I fellowshipped on the significance of the church’s cleansing work with her as well as how she should approach her duty. But after a period of time, Li Yan still wasn’t doing real work, and she still hadn’t gotten assessments of those church members. I also heard that Li Yan was irresponsible in her work and had failed to oversee resource management in the church, which led to quite a few items being damaged, causing the church serious financial losses. After that, she didn’t self-reflect and even tried to shift the blame, saying others hadn’t stored the items properly. I saw that she didn’t do any real work. She was careless in her attitude toward the various items of the church work, and didn’t accept criticism. When there were obstructions to the church’s work and its property was damaged, she didn’t feel the slightest bit guilty. Wasn’t that the sign of a false leader? But I didn’t report her issues in a timely manner. When I realized this, I felt quite guilty. I saw a passage of God’s words: “All of you say you are considerate of God’s burden and will defend the testimony of the church, but who among you has really been considerate of God’s burden? Ask yourself: Are you someone who has shown consideration for His burden? Can you practice righteousness for Him? Can you stand up and speak for Me? Can you steadfastly put the truth into practice? Are you bold enough to fight against all of Satan’s deeds? Would you be able to set your feelings aside and expose Satan for the sake of My truth? Can you allow My intentions to be satisfied in you? Have you offered up your heart in the most crucial of moments? Are you someone who follows My will? Ask yourself these questions, and think about them often” (The Word, Vol. 1. The Appearance and Work of God. Utterances of Christ in the Beginning, Chapter 13). I felt like God’s words were calling me to account. Especially when I saw the part that said: “Are you someone who has shown consideration for His burden? Can you practice righteousness for Him?” “Are you bold enough to fight against all of Satan’s deeds?” I felt particularly ashamed and guilty. God hopes that we can consider His intention and quickly take a stand to expose and stop people who disrupt and disturb church work to protect the church’s interests. I had known Li Yan for quite some time and had seen how she didn’t do real work and didn’t accept criticism, and I knew very well that if she wasn’t dismissed, the church’s work and the brothers’ and sisters’ life entry would both suffer losses. But I thought about how she’d helped me before, and worried that she’d hate me once she found out I reported her and say I lacked a conscience. So to protect our relationship, I didn’t want to report her problems, even when I clearly saw her failing to do real work, causing several disbelievers to not be cleared out of the church promptly and continue disturbing church life. I was so selfish and despicable! By violating the truth principles, abetting and shielding a false leader, and allowing her to disturb church life, hadn’t I become a shield for this false leader and shared in her evil doings? Realizing this, I hated myself for not reporting Li Yan in time and decided to report on her issues to the leaders right away.

After doing that, the upper leaders had me collect brothers’ and sisters’ assessments of Li Yan and then it could be decided based on her consistent performance if she should be dismissed. The leaders also said that if she was determined to be a false leader, I was to go along with them and dismiss Li Yan. I felt some hesitation when the upper leaders said that, thinking, “Li Yan helped me a lot after I was dismissed before. If I expose her and help the others discern her, she will say I lack a conscience.” I felt so torn and didn’t want to expose her. I realized my state was wrong, so I prayed to God, seeking to resolve my misgivings. I came across this passage of God’s words: “Who is Satan, who are demons, and who are God’s enemies if not resisters who do not believe in God? Are they not those people who are rebellious against God? Are they not those who claim to have faith, yet who lack truth? Are they not those who merely seek to obtain blessings while being unable to bear witness for God? You still mingle with those demons today and treat them with conscience and love, but in this case are you not extending good intentions toward Satan? Are you not in league with demons? If people have made it to this point and are still unable to distinguish between good and evil, and continue to blindly be loving and merciful without any desire to seek God’s intentions or being able in any way to take God’s intentions as their own, then their endings will be all the more wretched. Anyone who does not believe in the God in the flesh is an enemy of God. If you can bear conscience and love toward an enemy, do you not lack a sense of justice? If you are compatible with those which I detest and with which I disagree, and still bear love or personal feelings toward them, then are you not rebellious? Are you not intentionally resisting God? Does such a person possess truth? If people bear conscience toward enemies, love for demons, and mercy for Satan, then are they not intentionally disrupting God’s work?” (The Word, Vol. 1. The Appearance and Work of God. God and Man Will Enter Into Rest Together). God’s words really hit home with me. The passage clearly stated that people who seek the truth and uphold the church’s work should be treated with love, while those who are averse to the truth and disrupt and disturb the church’s work should be loathed and rejected. But even though I clearly saw that Li Yan wasn’t doing real work and was disrupting and disturbing the church’s work, I still showed her kindness and didn’t report her right away. Then, when it was time to expose her and help the others gain discernment and learn lessons, I was beset by worries, and concerned that she would hate me and say I was an ungrateful traitor. So I betrayed my conscience, shielding and harboring her. I truly lacked humanity. Where was my loyalty to God? Hadn’t I become one of Satan’s accomplices? Even while enjoying so much of God’s sustenance, I still bit the hand that feeds me. I was fine with letting the church’s work and my brothers’ and sisters’ life entry suffer, as long as my personal interests were safeguarded. I was so lacking in conscience and humanity! If I continued to fail to repent and practice the truth, God would eventually spurn me and eliminate me.

After that, I read a couple more passages of God’s words: “If God wants to save you, no matter whose services He uses to accomplish it, you should first thank God and accept it from God. You should not direct your gratitude solely toward people, to say nothing of offering up your life to someone in gratitude. This is a grave mistake. The crucial thing is that your heart is grateful to God, and you accept it from Him” (The Word, Vol. 6. On the Pursuit of the Truth I. What It Means to Pursue the Truth (7)). “Giving help to someone who happens to need it, at an appropriate time and place, is a very normal phenomenon. It is also the responsibility of every member of the human race. This is simply a sort of responsibility and obligation. God gave people these instincts when He created them. … helping people and being kind to them is near effortless for humans, it is within the scope of human instinct, and something which people are completely capable of accomplishing. There is no need to rank it as highly as kindness. However, many people equate the help of others with kindness, and are always talking about it and constantly repaying it, thinking that if they don’t, they have no conscience. They look down on themselves and despise themselves, even worrying they will be reprimanded by public opinion. Is it necessary to worry about these things? (No.) There are many people who cannot see past this, and are constantly constrained by this issue. This is what it is to not understand the truth principles” (The Word, Vol. 6. On the Pursuit of the Truth I. What It Means to Pursue the Truth (7)). Yes. God is the Creator; He holds sovereignty over and orchestrates all things. When I was at my weakest and most negative point, it might have seemed like Li Yan was treating me well with her help and fellowship, but, in reality, this was all God’s sovereignty and arrangements, not her care for me. I should have accepted that from God and thanked Him, instead of attributing it to her. Not to mention, Li Yan was a church leader, so it was actually her duty to support brothers and sisters and resolve any issues in their life entry. When Li Yan supported me and fellowshipped God’s words with me, she was just fulfilling her duty. Also, treating brothers and sisters with love, helping and supporting each other is one of God’s demands of His chosen people. I should have accepted Li Yan’s help from God and shown gratitude to Him. Instead, I fallaciously took it as her care for me and thought she was really a good person. I repeatedly shielded her because of my personal feelings. I clearly knew that she was a false leader, but I didn’t stand up to report and expose her. I was just so muddle-headed! I should have considered God’s intention, held to the truth principles, and exposed the false leader to safeguard the church’s work. This is what a person with conscience and humanity should do. If Li Yan was someone who accepted the truth, when she was pruned and exposed, she would reflect and come to know herself, see her own corruption and deficiencies clearly, repent and achieve transformation. This would also benefit her. If she wasn’t someone who accepted the truth, and when pruned, she didn’t repent, this would reveal the fact that she didn’t pursue the truth and should be dismissed in time. This would be helpful both to the church’s work and to others’ life entry. I had an absurd understanding of things: I always believed that pruning and exposing people was humiliating and hurting them. I was treating something very positive as negative. As a result, I was continually constrained by this fallacious belief and didn’t dare expose Li Yan’s issues. I really didn’t understand the truth and was truly pathetic. Having realized all that, I felt a sense of relief and stopped avoiding my responsibility.

A few days later, through investigating Li Yan’s consistent performance, the church determined that she was a false leader, and she was dismissed. After her dismissal, she didn’t self-reflect or come to know herself at all, and even complained that she was wronged. She argued that she’d been a leader for years, had given up her chance to make money out in the world, and endured countless hardships, so she felt the church was treating her unfairly. After that, she became obsessed with wealth, took a job to make money and stopped regularly attending gatherings. After her dismissal, the church held an election to select a new leader, the disbelievers were cleared out, church life no longer suffered disturbances, and the various items of the church work could proceed smoothly. Seeing all this, I felt much more at ease. I was so happy that I was able to seek the truth in this situation, identify my issues in time and fulfill my duty.

Later on, when I ran into Li Yan, she blew up on me, saying, “I don’t want to see your face! Now everyone’s saying I’m a false leader, and it was you who told them that. I hate you!” It made me pretty upset to hear her say that, but I knew that everything I had reported to the upper leaders was factual. She was a false leader and should be exposed and reported. This was completely in keeping with God’s intention. But why did it hurt so much to hear her say she hated me? Later on, I read a passage of God’s words that gave me an understanding of the root of the problem. God’s words say: “Although people may eat and drink of God’s words every day and pray-read and contemplate them often, the basic views, principles, and methods underlying how they view people and things, as well as how they comport themselves and act, are still based on traditional culture. Therefore, traditional culture affects people by subjecting them to its manipulation, orchestrations, and control in their day-to-day lives. It is as unshakable and inescapable as their own shadows. Why is this? Because people cannot uncover, dissect, or expose, from the depths of their hearts, the various ideas and views that traditional culture and Satan have instilled in them; they cannot recognize, see through, rebel against, or abandon these things; they cannot view people and things, comport themselves, or act in the way God tells them to, or in the way He teaches and instructs. What sort of predicament do most people still live in because of this? One in which they have a desire deep in their hearts to view people and things, to comport themselves and act based on God’s words, to not go against God’s intentions or the truth, yet, defenselessly and involuntarily, they continue to interact with people, conduct themselves, and handle matters according to the methods Satan teaches. At heart, people long for the truth and wish to possess a tremendous desire for God, to view people and things, to comport themselves and act according to God’s words, and to not violate the truth principles, yet things always end up contrary to their wishes. Even after doubling down on their efforts, the result they get is still not what they desire. No matter how people struggle, no matter how much effort they put in, no matter how much they resolve and desire to attain a love for positive things, in the end, the truth they are able to practice and the criteria of the truth they are able to hold to in real life are few and far between. This is what distresses people most, deep in their hearts. What is the reason for this? One reason is none other than that the various ideas and views that traditional culture teaches people still dominate their hearts, and control their words, deeds, ideas, as well as the methods and ways in which they comport themselves and act. Thus, people must undergo a process in order to recognize traditional culture, to dissect and expose it, to discern and see through it, and ultimately, to abandon it forever. It is very important to do this, not something optional. This is because traditional culture already dominates the depths of people’s hearts—it even dominates their whole selves. This means that in their lives, people cannot stop themselves from violating the truth in how they conduct themselves, and how they handle matters, and they cannot help but be controlled and influenced by traditional culture, as they have been until today” (The Word, Vol. 6. On the Pursuit of the Truth I. Why Man Must Pursue the Truth). After pondering over God’s words I realized that I was living based upon traditional cultural values and satanic philosophies like “The kindness of a drop of water should be repaid with a gushing spring” and “A kindness received should be gratefully repaid.” I took these ideas as my guiding principles. I believed that I should do my best to protect and repay those who were kind and had done nice things for me regardless of whether they were good or bad people or acted according to the truth principles. Even if they did evil and disrupted and disturbed the church’s work, I should cover for them, otherwise I would be lacking in conscience and humanity. It was because I was constrained by these satanic philosophies and fallacies that, despite clearly seeing that Li Yan didn’t do real work and was a false leader, I delayed exposing and reporting her because she had helped me before. I always wanted to give her another chance and be lenient, to be kind and loving to her. I didn’t consider whether the church’s work and the brothers’ and sisters’ life entry had been harmed. I was indulging a false leader’s evil-doing and standing on Satan’s side, rebelling against and resisting God. I saw that, in essence, these traditional values are all fallacies and devilish words used by Satan to mislead and corrupt people. They are not principles that we should live by. Living by such ideas would only make me increasingly ridiculous and absurd. My thoughts would become more and more muddled, unable to discern good from evil and I’d only ever violate the truth and resist God.

One day, I read another passage of God’s words that says: “Sometimes, the effects of one’s conscience are constrained and influenced by their feelings, and as a result, their decisions conflict with the truth principles. As such, we can see one fact clearly: The effect of one’s conscience is inferior to the standard of the truth, and sometimes people violate the truth while acting based on their consciences. If you believe in God, but do not live by the truth, and instead act based on your conscience, can you do evil and resist God? You will truly be able to do some evil things—it absolutely cannot be said that it is never wrong to act based on one’s conscience. This shows that if one wishes to satisfy God and accord with His intentions, merely acting based on one’s conscience is greatly insufficient. One must act based on the truth in order to fulfill God’s demands” (The Word, Vol. 6. On the Pursuit of the Truth I. What It Means to Pursue the Truth (2)). Yes. We should all have a conscience, but that’s not the truth and cannot replace it. If we only act and behave according to our conscience instead of following the truth, we’ll be likely to go against the truth and resist God. God asks that we love what He loves and hate what He hates. This is the principle we should apply to approach others. If a brother or sister is a truth-pursuer, then no matter if they’ve shown me kindness, when they encounter problems, I ought to help them with love. If they commit evil acts or if they’re a false leader, evil person or antichrist, then even if they’ve been gracious toward me, I should treat them according to the truth principles and expose and report them. So when Li Yan disrupted and disturbed church work and didn’t accept the truth at all, failing to repent and transform no matter how we fellowshipped with and helped her, I shouldn’t shield her in keeping with my so-called “conscience,” but rather, should expose and report her according to the truth principles. By not doing that, I was just harming brothers and sisters and causing greater losses to the church’s work. Realizing this was enlightening, and I felt I had a path of practice and principles to use in my treatment of others. Later on, Li Yan was so defiant and dissatisfied about being dismissed that not only did she start pursuing wealth and skipping gatherings, but she even spread negativity among the others, continued disturbing church life, and refused to accept fellowship and pruning many times. She should be cleared out according to principle. That time, I didn’t try to shield her again, instead helping the leaders collect the brothers’ and sisters’ evaluations of her. With the approval of over 80% of brothers and sisters, Li Yan was cleared out of the church.

Only after experiencing all that did I realize that living by Satan’s philosophies only obstructs the practice of truth and can even disrupt and disturb the church’s work. Only those who go by God’s words in how they behave and view people and things truly have humanity and are able to protect the church’s work and align with God’s intentions. God’s words have rectified my fallacious beliefs and helped me understand the principles of how to treat others.