Question 6: All these things you’re talking about are sins Paul committed before he accepted the Lord’s calling. However, after he was shone by the great light, he began traveling everywhere spreading the Lord’s gospel. He established so many churches and led so many people to accept the salvation of the Lord Jesus. He wrote so many letters in support of the faithful. This shows that Brother Paul had already repented. You can’t conclude that he was an enemy of the Lord Jesus based on his performance before he returned to the Lord.
Answer: It is true that Paul spread the gospel for many years and wrote many letters after being shone by the great light, but that doesn’t mean he really repented. Nowhere in his letters does it ever indicate that he really reflected on and knew his own evil behavior: his fanatical resistance of the Lord Jesus and persecution of His disciples. He just merely acknowledged that he was the foremost of all sinners. He never described his own nature and substance, nor did he say why he resisted the Lord Jesus, what his motive was. The fact that he never addressed these things in writing means he never really repented, doesn’t it? Why was Paul able to answer the Lord Jesus’ calling and work for the Lord? In reality, he had no other choice. Paul knew if he didn’t accept the Lord Jesus’ calling, he’d face punishment and certain death. He was able to spread the gospel and suffer a bit because he wished to atone for his sins. How can one person who just seek atonement truly repent? Furthermore, we can clearly see from Paul’s letters that when Paul was spreading the gospel and doing his work, he never exalted the Lord Jesus or bore witness to Him. He never testified about how the Lord Jesus redeemed people, supplied people, and led people. He definitely never testified about how the Lord Jesus is the truth, the way, and the life, that He is the appearance of God, God incarnate who does God’s own work. Paul never testified about the Lord Jesus’ loveable qualities, nor did he ever testify about how the Lord Jesus suffered pain and humiliation in order to save mankind. He never preached or testified about the truths that the Lord Jesus once expressed or everything He said. He never encouraged other believers to abide by the Lord Jesus’ words, He never told them that they must follow, serve and testify to the Lord according to the truths expressed by the Lord Jesus. He definitely never told them about the substance of the Lord Jesus’ work and its true effects, or how people should do the heavenly Father’s will in order to enter the kingdom of heaven. Instead, he explained the Lord Jesus’ work according to his ideas, and misinterpreted the Lord Jesus’ words. Many words that he said seriously interrupted and disturbed God’s work in the Age of Grace. Does that prove he really repented? Paul’s work did not bring the believers before the Lord Jesus. He did not lead people to experience the Lord Jesus’ words or know that the Lord Jesus was the appearance of God. Instead, he exalted himself and bore witness to himself. He brought the believers before himself and made them adore him. Is this not the same path the Pharisees walked down? These facts are enough to prove that Paul never truly repented.
Excerpted from the movie screenplay of Stinging Memories