By Toby, South Korea

A few months ago, a leader assigned Brother Connor and me to take charge of watering work. After a little while, I noticed that he didn’t take on much of a burden in his work. He didn’t fellowship and help the brothers and sisters with their problems quickly, and wasn’t very engaged in work discussions. Having learned of the situation, the leader told me that Connor was being perfunctory and irresponsible, and that I had to fellowship with him. I thought, maybe he was just busy and some work was delayed. Forget it, it wasn’t like he was doing nothing at all. I shouldn’t ask too much of him, and I’ll go handle the issues he hadn’t resolved through fellowship yet. So, I didn’t look into the situation of his work. After a while, before a gathering for some brothers and sisters, I reminded Connor to first find out about their issues and difficulties ahead of time in order to find the appropriate words of God for fellowship to resolve them, and make the gathering more effective. Later, I asked some of the brothers and sisters if Connor had asked about their states and difficulties, and they all said he hadn’t. I felt like he was being really irresponsible. The others had lots of difficulties and flaws in their duties. They needed more gatherings for help and fellowship, but he wasn’t taking it seriously. That was really perfunctory of him! I thought, this time I should bring his issue up. But then I thought, if he didn’t accept it, if he said I was too hard on him and became biased against me, wouldn’t that make me seem too strict, too unfeeling toward others? Besides, Connor was young, so he would inevitably consider his flesh. Sometimes I got perfunctory and considered my flesh, too, so I shouldn’t be too demanding. I could handle it myself. Isn’t there a saying that goes, “Be strict with yourself and tolerant of others”? It was fine that I’d get busier; all I needed to do was cut down on my rest a bit. So, I didn’t go fellowship with Connor and point out this problem of his. I acted that way with other work, too. When I saw someone wasn’t doing their work well, I didn’t look to see what was causing that or think about how to address it, but was just always tolerant and patient. Sometimes I’d get very disgusted or angry about someone’s behavior, but I’d just bottle it up. I thought, “Forget it—let them do as much as they’re able to, and I will take care of the rest.” Over time, the brothers and sisters wanted to seek me out for help with their problems. I no longer felt wronged or upset when I saw that they all thought highly of me. So, all along, I felt that being strict with myself and tolerant of others in our collaborations and interactions was being a person with good humanity, not like some people who are always nitpicky and can’t work with anyone.

Then one day I read something in God’s words about being “strict with yourself and tolerant of others,” and saw myself differently. Almighty God says: “Let us now fellowship on the next saying regarding moral conduct—‘Be strict with yourself and tolerant of others’—what does this saying mean? It means that you should make strict demands of yourself and be lenient with other people, so that they can see how generous and magnanimous you are. Why should people do this, then? What is it meant to achieve? Is it doable? (No.) Is it really a natural expression of normal humanity? (No.) You must compromise yourself so much in order to take this on! You must be free of desires and demands, requiring yourself to feel less joy, suffer a bit more, pay more of a price and work more so that others do not have to wear themselves out. And if others whine, complain, or perform poorly, you must not ask too much of them—more or less is good enough. People believe that this is a sign of noble morals—but why does it ring false to Me? Is it not false? (It is.) Under normal circumstances, the natural expression of an ordinary person’s humanity is to be tolerant of themselves and strict with others. That is a fact. People can perceive everyone else’s problems—‘This person is arrogant! That person is bad! This one is selfish! That one is perfunctory in doing their duty! This person is so lazy!’—while to themselves they think: ‘Even if I’m a bit lazy, that’s fine because I’m of good caliber, and I do a better job than others!’ They find fault with others and like to nitpick, but with themselves they are exceptionally tolerant and accommodating wherever possible. Is this not a natural expression of their humanity? (It is.) If people are expected to live up to the idea of being ‘strict with yourself and tolerant of others,’ what agony must they put themselves through? Could they really bear it? How many people would manage to do so? (None.) And why is that? (People are selfish by nature. They act according to the principle that it is ‘Every man for himself and the devil take the hindmost.’) Indeed, man is born selfish, man is a selfish creature, and is deeply committed to that satanic philosophy: ‘Every man for himself and the devil take the hindmost.’ People think that it would be catastrophic for them, and unnatural, not to be selfish and look out for themselves when things befall them. This is what people believe and it is how they act. If people are expected not to be selfish, and to make strict demands of themselves, and to willingly lose out rather than take advantage of others, and if they are expected to happily say, when someone takes advantage of them, ‘You’re taking advantage but I’m not making a fuss about it. I’m a tolerant person, I won’t badmouth you or try to get my own back on you, and if you haven’t taken enough advantage yet, feel free to carry on’—is that a realistic expectation? How many people could manage to do this? Is this the way that corrupt mankind normally behaves? Obviously, for this to happen is anomalous. Why so? Because people with corrupt dispositions, especially selfish and vile people, struggle for their own interests, and will absolutely not feel satisfied due to giving thought to others. So, this phenomenon, when it does happen, is an anomaly. ‘Be strict with yourself and tolerant of others’—this saying about moral conduct is clearly a demand that does not tally with the facts, or with humanity, which was proposed on the basis of human notions and imaginings by social moralists while lacking an understanding of humanity. It is the same as demanding that a mouse not make holes or that a cat not catch mice. Is it right to make such a demand? (No. It defies the laws of humanity.) This demand clearly does not square with reality, and it is very hollow” (The Word, Vol. 6. On the Pursuit of the Truth. What It Means to Pursue the Truth (6)). I didn’t entirely understand these words from God when I first read them, because I’d always thought that “Be strict with yourself and tolerant of others” was a positive thing. I always admired people like that and I aspired to be like that. But carefully thinking over God’s words, I felt they were entirely true. I was utterly convinced. And I was really taken aback when I read this: “People with corrupt dispositions, especially selfish and vile people, struggle for their own interests, and will absolutely not feel satisfied due to giving thought to others. So, this phenomenon, when it does happen, is an anomaly. ‘Be strict with yourself and tolerant of others’—this saying about moral conduct is clearly a demand that does not tally with the facts, or with humanity, which was proposed on the basis of human notions and imaginings by social moralists while lacking an understanding of humanity. It is the same as demanding that a mouse not make holes or that a cat not catch mice.” It turned out that the idea of “Be strict with yourself and tolerant of others” I’d been upholding was impractical, went against humanity, and was something people just can’t achieve. It can’t be a criterion by which people conduct themselves and act. Looking back on my behavior, it really was just as God had exposed. When I was strict with myself and lenient with others, I felt wronged and upset, and even when I met that mark, I didn’t really want to—I wasn’t happy to do it. Like with Connor, I was well aware that he was muddling through his duty, being lazy, slippery and irresponsible. I was angry and I wanted to expose his issues so he could turn things around quickly. But I’d think about how I shouldn’t be too strict, that I should be hard on myself, and easy on others, so I’d give up on the idea of talking to him about his problems. I felt like I could suffer a little more, pay a bit more of a price, and not ask too much of him so I wouldn’t seem too inconsiderate, and too nitpicky. I was responsible for a few groups’ work, so I already had a heavy workload. Having to also help him address issues in his work left me feeling wronged, and I had lots of complaints, but for the sake of being strict with myself and tolerant of others, and so others would think well of me, I just kept quiet and tolerated it. That was my actual state, and what I really thought. Just as God says: “Man is born selfish, man is a selfish creature, and is deeply committed to that satanic philosophy: ‘Every man for himself and the devil take the hindmost.’ People think that it would be catastrophic for them, and unnatural, not to be selfish and look out for themselves when things befall them. This is what people believe and it is how they act.” Man is selfish by nature, and I’m no exception. When I’m doing more, I resent the hard work and toil and I feel wronged, upset, and unhappy about it. But why did I still go against my heart, being strict with myself and lenient with others? What corrupt disposition is really hidden behind this idea of being “strict with yourself and tolerant of others”? What are the consequences of being that way? With these questions, I came before God to pray and seek.

One day, I read a passage of God’s words: “‘Be strict with yourself and tolerant of others,’ as with sayings about ‘Don’t pocket the money you pick up’ and ‘Derive pleasure from helping others,’ is one of those demands that traditional culture makes regarding people’s moral conduct. By the same token, regardless of whether someone can attain or practice this moral conduct, it is still not the standard or norm for measuring their humanity. It may be that you really are capable of being strict with yourself and tolerant of others, and that you hold yourself particularly stringently to certain standards, and especially keep yourself morally unsullied. You may always think of others and show consideration for them no matter what you are doing, not seek benefits for yourself, and seem particularly impartial and selfless. It may be that you also have a sense of social responsibility and social morals, and show your noble integrity and character to those around you and even to your family. Your words and actions may never meet with any criticism or reproach, and they may also elicit profuse praise and even admiration. People may regard you as someone who is truly strict with themselves and tolerant of others. However, these are merely some external appearances, and even though they are external appearances, no person can truly achieve them. Furthermore, are the thoughts in the depths of people’s minds consistent with these external appearances, with these actions that are lived out externally? They absolutely cannot be. Those scholars, experts, or rulers who advocate these doctrines all have a motive. So, what is that motive, exactly? It is to deceive and mislead people into worshiping them, into revering them as saints. Can such an intent and motive be brought out into the open? Certainly not. This proves that this motive is something unspeakable, something dark and wicked. … It can be said with certainty that most of the people who require themselves to fulfill the moral of being ‘strict with yourself and tolerant of others,’ are obsessed with status. Driven by their corrupt dispositions, they cannot help but pursue prestige among men, social prominence, and status in the eyes of others. All of these things are related to their desire for status, and are pursued under the cover of their good moral conduct. And how do these pursuits of theirs come about? They entirely come from and are driven by their corrupt dispositions. So, no matter what, whether someone fulfills the moral of being ‘strict with yourself and tolerant of others’ or not, and whether or not they do so to perfection, this cannot change their humanity essence at all. By implication, this means that it cannot in any way change their outlook on life or their value system, or guide their attitudes and perspectives on all manner of people, events, and things. Isn’t that the case? (It is.) The more that someone is capable of being strict with themselves and tolerant of others, the better they are at putting on an act, disguising themselves, and at misleading others with good behavior and pleasing words, and the more deceitful and wicked they are by nature. The more that they are this type of person, the deeper their love and pursuit of status and power becomes. However great, glorious and correct their external moral conduct seems to be, and however pleasing it is for people to behold, the unspoken pursuit that lies in the depths of their heart, as well as their nature essence, and even their ambitions, may burst forth from them at any time. Therefore, however good their moral conduct is, it cannot conceal their intrinsic humanity essence, or their ambitions and desires. It cannot conceal their hideous nature essence which does not love positive things and is averse to and hates the truth. As these facts show, the saying ‘Be strict with yourself and tolerant of others’ is more than just absurd—it exposes those ambitious types who attempt to use such sayings and behaviors to cover up their unspeakable ambitions and desires” (The Word, Vol. 6. On the Pursuit of the Truth. What It Means to Pursue the Truth (6)). I saw from what’s exposed in God’s words that being “strict with yourself and tolerant of others” looks like it’s being understanding and tolerant of others, that it’s being broad-minded and noble, but deep inside, an unspeakable, dark, evil motive lurks. It’s flaunting yourself through superficially good behavior, just to gain admiration from and be worshiped by others, and have a higher status and reputation among others. That kind of person seems commendable from the outside, but in fact, they’re a hypocrite, pretending to be a good person. I thought about how I’d acted and what I’d revealed while partnering with Connor. No matter how perfunctory and irresponsible he was in work, I not only didn’t point it out and fellowship or prune him, but kept being understanding, accommodating and indulgent. No matter how busy I was, how little time I had, I’d go do whatever Connor hadn’t done. Even if it was difficult or tiring, I’d push through. In fact, doing that wasn’t me being magnanimous. I had ulterior motives. I was afraid of wounding his pride and offending him if I pointed it out directly, caring how he would think of me. Even though I wasn’t willing to help him do what he hadn’t done, I just forced myself to do it every time, to leave a good impression, to show everyone how generous I was, and to gain their admiration. As a result, I became more and more slippery and deceitful. I seemed like an understanding person, but my own wrong motives were behind that. The way I acted was giving people a false impression, deceiving them, and fooling them. At that point, I gained some discernment of the essence of being “strict with yourself and tolerant of others.” I felt that the despicable motives hidden in my heart were nauseating. I was also really grateful to God. Without Him exposing the essence of that part of traditional culture, I’d have remained deluded, thinking that being “strict with yourself and tolerant of others” was being someone with good humanity. I finally realized this is a fallacy Satan uses to mislead and corrupt people. It’s not the truth at all, nor is it a standard or criterion for evaluating a person’s humanity.

Later, I read two passages of God’s words: “No matter how standardized mankind’s so-called requirements and sayings about people’s moral character are, or how much they suit the tastes, outlooks, wishes, and even interests of the masses, they are not the truth. This is something you must understand. And since they are not the truth, you should make haste to deny and abandon them. You must also dissect their essence, as well as the consequences that come from people living by them. Can they really help you to know yourself? Can they really bring about true repentance in you? Can they really make you live out the likeness of a true human being? They can do none of these things. They will only make you hypocritical and self-righteous. They will make you more cunning and wicked. There are some who say, ‘In the past, when we held to these aspects of traditional culture, we felt like good people. When other people saw how we behaved, they thought we were good people, too. But actually, we know in our hearts what sort of evil we are capable of. Doing a bit of good only disguises that. But if we abandon the good behaviors that traditional culture demands of us, what should we do instead? What behaviors and manifestations will bring glory to God?’ What do you think of this question? Do they still not know what truths believers in God should practice? God has expressed so many truths, and there are so many truths that people should be practicing. So why do you refuse to practice the truth, and insist on being false good people and hypocrites? Why are you pretending?” (The Word, Vol. 6. On the Pursuit of the Truth. What It Means to Pursue the Truth (5)). “In short, though we have listed these sayings about moral conduct from traditional culture, the goal of this is not merely to inform you that they are the notions and imaginings of people, and that they come from Satan, and nothing more. It is to make you understand clearly that the essence of these things is false, disguised, and deceptive. Even if people possess these behaviors, it does not in any way mean that they are living out normal humanity. Rather, they are using these false behaviors to cover up their intents and goals, and to conceal their corrupt dispositions, and their nature essence. As a result, people are getting better and better at pretending and tricking others, which in turn causes them to become even more corrupt and evil. The moral standards of traditional culture that corrupt humanity clings to are incompatible with the truths that God expresses, nor are they consistent with any of the words that God teaches people, they have no connection whatsoever. If you still cling to aspects of traditional culture, then you have been thoroughly misled and poisoned. If there is any matter in which you cling to traditional culture and abide by its principles and views, then you are rebelling against God and violating the truth, and running counter to God in that matter. If you cling to and commit yourself to any of these claims about moral conduct, and treat it as a criterion or basis for how you view people or things, then that is where you have erred, and if you judge or harm people to a certain degree, you will have committed a sin. If you always insist on measuring everyone by the moral standards of traditional culture, then the number of people that you have condemned and wronged will keep multiplying and you will certainly condemn and resist God, and then you will be an arch-sinner” (The Word, Vol. 6. On the Pursuit of the Truth. What It Means to Pursue the Truth (5)). Pondering God’s words brought me some more clarity. When we notice someone being perfunctory, cunning, or irresponsible in work, we should point it out to them or prune them so they can see the nature and consequences of being perfunctory, and turn it around in time. That’s what someone with good humanity should do. But to preserve my image and status, I was indulgent and accommodating, and kept quiet about problems I saw. As a result, Connor wasn’t aware of his corrupt disposition, and he continued being perfunctory and irresponsible in his duty. That’s damaging for the life entry of brothers and sisters—that’s a transgression. I wasn’t being remotely considerate or understanding of him, but I was harming him. I saw I wasn’t a truly good person at all. Not only was I harming brothers and sisters, but I was delaying and impacting the church’s work. At that moment, I truly realized that “Be strict with yourself and tolerant of others” isn’t the truth, that it is not the criterion by which people should conduct themselves, but a heresy and fallacy that Satan uses to mislead, misguide and corrupt people. I couldn’t keep letting Satan fool me—I should do what God requires, using God’s words as my basis and the truth as my criterion for my views on people and things as well as my self-conduct and action. After that, when I noticed issues with Connor, I didn’t tolerate or indulge him anymore. I pointed them out so he could realize them and change.

Before long, I was given responsibility for another item of work, which was handling general affairs. While checking up on it, I noticed a brother wasn’t serious in his duty and was sloppy in everything he did. I wanted to just sort out his mistakes myself and be done with them, to avoid pointing them out and embarrassing him. Then it occurred to me that I was revealing these thoughts to protect my own interests and establish a good image with others. I didn’t want to point out his issue, afraid to offend him. That’s a despicable motive! I remembered something God said: “At the same time as doing your duty properly, you must also ensure that you do nothing that does not benefit the life entry of God’s chosen people, and say nothing that is not edifying to the brothers and sisters. At the very least, you must do nothing that goes against your conscience and must absolutely not do anything shameful. In particular, you absolutely must not do that which rebels against or resists God, nor anything that disturbs the work or life of the church. Be upright and honorable in everything you do and ensure that your every action is presentable before God” (The Word, Vol. 1. The Appearance and Work of God. How Is Your Relationship With God?). God’s words showed me clearly the principle of doing things. Whatever I do, it has to benefit brothers’ and sisters’ life entry and be edifying. I also have to accept God’s scrutiny. When I saw that brother being perfunctory in his duty, I should point it out so he could see his problem and quickly change. That would be beneficial for his life entry and for the church’s work. If I didn’t say anything, but just quietly helped him do things, he wouldn’t see his issues and he wouldn’t progress in his duty. At this thought, I spoke up about the problems I saw in his work. He wanted to change after he heard me out. I felt really at ease and at peace after I put that into practice. Thank Almighty God!