36. Reflections on Resisting Supervision

By Mi Hui, China

In 2021 I was responsible for the church’s watering work. During that time, the leaders would supervise and follow up on our work by often inquiring about our progress, and whether we had any problems or difficulties in doing our duty. At first, I would actively respond, but gradually I became impatient and thought, “Always following up on our work is too much trouble. Who knows how much of our time is wasted? Won’t that affect my work results? If my results are poor, won’t the leaders dismiss me?” With those thoughts in mind, I became very resistant toward that kind of supervision by the leaders.

The leaders once sent a letter to understand our work status, asking questions including how many people had accepted the gospel that month, how many newcomers did not gather regularly and why, their existing religious notions, and how we fellowshipped to resolve them. Seeing that series of questions made me feel troubled, thinking, “So much content to cover, and I have to review and discuss it all with the waterers. It will waste so much time!” So I resisted in my heart, “Asking so many detailed questions about the work wastes too much of our time! Then if the results of our watering work are poor, will you say that I didn’t do real work, and don’t have work ability?” When I saw that the sisters who were my work partners also felt troubled, I thought, “If they also feel this is a waste of time, then as a team, we can give the leaders a suggestion. Then maybe in the future, when the leaders follow up on the work, they won’t ask such specific questions, and fewer shortcomings in my work will be exposed.” So half-joking, I said, “The leaders must really care about us to ask such detailed questions about our work.” As soon as I said that, one sister chimed in and said, “Down to the smallest detail!” Upon hearing that the sister and I were thinking the same thing, I laughed and said, “We are all busy enough as it is. Having to understand and respond to these questions is too much trouble. Won’t that impact the effectiveness of our watering work?” Seeing the other sisters nodding in agreement made me secretly happy, “It looks like they all object to it. Later, we can get together and submit suggestions to the leaders. That way they won’t always be checking up on our work.” With my incitement, whenever the leaders tried to learn about our work, my work partners would look troubled and even if they replied, they would reluctantly respond in a few sentences. They didn’t give detailed summaries of the problems and deviations in the work, so the leaders couldn’t understand or come to grips with our work issues. As a result, our watering work never improved.

Another time, the leaders discovered that we did not pay enough attention to cultivating waterers, and sent a letter to fellowship about the importance of that work and to give us some good practice methods. The letter also pointed out that we were not bearing a burden for that cultivation work, were dragging our feet on implementation, and that our efficiency was too low, which not only deprived the brothers and sisters of training but also directly impacted the watering work. The leaders wanted us to treat this as an important issue, and demanded that we quickly train some newcomers to practice watering. After seeing the letter, I felt resistant: “This is asking way too much. These newcomers had just started to train in their duty. You think cultivating them is so easy? You have experience training people, but you can’t hold us to your standard!” But then I thought, “If I complain directly, will the leaders think I lack work ability? I can’t let that happen! I have to make them understand that our entire team can’t meet this demand. That way the leaders can’t do anything to us, and even if they pursue this issue, I’m not the only one involved.” Frowning, and with some difficulty, I said, “The leaders’ demand is a bit high, and our experience can’t compare to theirs.” As soon as I said that, one by one the other sisters nodded in approval. One of them said, “The leaders are high-caliber people and work very efficiently. How can we possibly compare with them?” Another said, “The leaders are asking too much of us. How can we do this work going forward?” Seeing that everyone felt that way, I was very happy, thinking, “Now the leaders shouldn’t be able to do anything to us. After all, they can’t dismiss our whole team!” The next day I sent the leaders a response letter that described all the difficulties we had in doing our duty so they could understand our situation. At the end of the letter, I intentionally added a line that said, “These are the results of our work for now, and it is not easy to improve them.” In the letter, I emphasized the word “our” so the leaders would know that was our collective opinion. That way they would no longer put such high demands on us. But to my surprise, during the next gathering the leaders pruned and exposed me, saying that when doing my duty I didn’t bear a burden and didn’t strive to improve. They said that I spread negativity, formed a clique and instigated the sisters to join me in resisting, that I delayed cultivating newcomers, and disturbed the church’s work, and that I didn’t play a positive role in the group at all. Finally, they dismissed me.

After being dismissed, I was filled with remorse and very upset. I knew that I had caused trouble, done evil, and offended God. When facing problems, I didn’t seek the truth, and spread notions which led to everyone living in a state of negativity and passivity. I really did obstruct the church’s work. Later when I reflected on my situation, I came upon this passage of God’s words: “Because, in their hearts, antichrists always doubt the divine essence of Christ, and always have a disobedient disposition, when Christ asks them to do things, they always scrutinize and discuss them, and ask people to determine whether they are right or wrong. Is this a grievous problem? (Yes.) They are not approaching these things from the perspective of submission to the truth; instead, they approach them in opposition to God. This is the disposition of the antichrists. When they hear the commands and work arrangements of Christ, they do not accept and submit to them, but start to discuss. And what is it they discuss? Do they discuss how to practice submission? (No.) They discuss whether the words and commands of Christ are right or wrong, and examine whether or not they should be carried out. Is their attitude one of actually wanting to carry these things out? No—they want to encourage more people to be like them, to not do these things. And is not doing them practicing the truth of submission? Obviously not. So what are they doing? (Opposing.) Not only are they themselves opposing God, they’re looking for collective opposition, too. This is the nature of their actions, is it not? Collective opposition: making everyone the same as them, making everyone think the same as them, say the same as them, decide the same as them, collectively opposing Christ’s decision and commands. This is the modus operandi of the antichrists. The antichrists’ belief is, ‘It’s not a crime if everyone does it,’ and so they urge others to oppose God together with him, thinking that with this being the case, there’ll be nothing the house of God can do to them. Isn’t this stupid? The antichrists’ own ability to oppose God is extremely limited, they’re all alone. So they try to recruit people to collectively oppose God, thinking in their hearts that ‘I’ll mislead a group of people, and make them think and act in the same way I do. Together, we will reject the words of christ, and impede the words of god, and stop them from coming to fruition. And when someone comes to check my work, I’ll say that everyone decided to do it like this—and then we’ll see how you handle that. I’m not going to do it for you, I’m not going to carry this out—and let’s see what you do to me!’ … are these things that are manifested in the antichrists not hateful? (They are extremely hateful.) And what makes them hateful? These antichrists wish to seize power in the house of God; the words of Christ cannot be implemented by them, they will not carry them out. Of course, another kind of situation could also be involved when people are unable to submit to Christ’s words: Some people are of poor caliber, they can’t understand God’s words when they hear them, and do not know how to carry them out; even if you teach them how to, they still can’t. This is a different matter. The topic we’re fellowshipping right now is the essence of antichrists, which doesn’t relate to whether people are capable of doing things, or what their caliber is like; it relates to the disposition and essence of the antichrists. They are completely opposing Christ, the work arrangements of the house of God, and the truth principles. They have no submission, only opposition. This is what an antichrist is(The Word, Vol. 4. Exposing Antichrists. Item Ten: They Despise the Truth, Brazenly Flout Principles, and Ignore the Arrangements of God’s House (Part Four)). After reading God’s words, I realized the serious nature of my actions, especially after seeing God’s words expose how antichrists lack a submissive attitude toward, and never accept God’s requirements and the work arrangements of God’s house. Their hearts are full of resistance and confrontation, and they mislead others and gather them to oppose. Thinking back on how I acted these days, I saw my behavior was of the same nature as theirs. When the leaders followed up on our work in detail, I didn’t want to take the trouble, and worried that it was wasting time I could spend doing my duty, impacting the work results. I couldn’t accept that, so I spread prejudiced opinions against the leaders and incited the sisters in our team to join me in a united front and oppose them. When the leaders pointed out that our progress was slow and our results lacking, and shared how to improve our work efficiency, I resisted, argued, and wouldn’t submit. I felt the leaders’ demands were excessive, and they didn’t understand our real difficulties. When they fellowshipped on ways to improve our work efficiency, I wouldn’t listen. To make the leaders relent, lower their demands, and understand that the poor work results were not solely because of me, I spread the idea among the brothers and sisters that the leaders’ demands were too high, so that they would also feel that the leaders were making things difficult for us, and I incited them to join me in opposing. I was so deceitful, and said things full of ulterior motives and satanic trickery, using other people to achieve my objective. The leaders wanted a detailed understanding of our work to quickly discover and correct problems and deviations, help us work more effectively, and cultivate newcomers as soon as possible so they could do their duty. The leaders were doing specific work according to God’s requirements and the church’s arrangements. But I did not submit, and instead, I opposed. This was not making things difficult for the leaders, but actually opposing the church’s work and God’s requirements, and standing in complete opposition to Him. I misled and incited everyone into taking my side so they would think the way I thought, and say the same things I said, opposing the church’s arrangements together. What I’d revealed was the disposition of an antichrist, and I played the role of a servant of Satan! I spoke negatively to mislead the brothers and sisters so that everyone stopped thinking about making progress, and was satisfied with the status quo, doing their duty in a perfunctory way every day, and the watering work always produced poor results. I was doing evil by obstructing and disturbing the church’s work. When I realized that, I started to be afraid. If I kept on doing that I would only do even more evil, ultimately become an antichrist, and be revealed and eliminated. I came before God and prayed, “Oh God, it was a clear sign of Your righteousness that I was dismissed. Through being exposed and judged by Your words, I have come to a better understanding of my antichrist disposition. Through my dismissal, You protected me, and even more, You saved me. I am grateful to You!”

Thereafter, I found two more passages of God’s words that exposed this facet of mankind’s corrupt disposition. Almighty God says: “Antichrists often unleash a set of theories to mislead people, and no matter which work task they implement, they have the final say, completely violating the truth principles. Looking at it from the manifestations of antichrists, what exactly is their disposition? Are they people who love positive things and love the truth? Do they have true submission toward God? (No.) Their essence is one of being averse to and hating the truth. Moreover, they are so arrogant that they lose all rationality, even lacking the basic conscience and reason that people should have. Such people are not worthy to be called human. They can only be said to be those of Satan’s ilk; they are devils. Anyone who doesn’t accept the truth in the slightest is a devil—this is beyond all doubt(The Word, Vol. 4. Exposing Antichrists. Item Ten: They Despise the Truth, Brazenly Flout Principles, and Ignore the Arrangements of God’s House (Part Four)). “In the hearts of the antichrists, what is their attitude toward practicing the truth and submitting to Christ? One word: opposition. They keep opposing. And what is the disposition contained within this opposition? What gives rise to it? Disobedience is what gives rise to it. In terms of disposition, this is aversion to the truth, it is having disobedience in their hearts, it is them not wanting to submit. And so, what do the antichrists think, in their hearts, when the house of God asks that leaders and workers learn to work together in harmony, instead of one person calling all the shots, that they learn how to discuss with others? ‘It’s too much trouble discussing everything with people! I can make the decisions about these things. Working with others, talking it over with them, doing things according to principle—how wimpy, how embarrassing!’ The antichrists think that they understand the truth, that everything is clear to them, that they have their own insights and ways of doing things, and so they are incapable of collaborating with others, they don’t discuss anything with people, they do everything their own way, and don’t yield to anyone else! Although the antichrists verbally declare that they are willing to submit and are willing to collaborate with others, no matter how good their answers appear on the outside, how nice-sounding their words, they are unable to change their rebellious state, are unable to change their satanic dispositions. Inside, however, they are ferociously oppositional—to what extent? If explained in the language of knowledge, this is a phenomenon that occurs when two things of different natures are put together: repulsion, which we can interpret as ‘opposition.’ This is precisely the disposition of antichrists: opposition to the Above. They like to oppose the Above and they obey no one(The Word, Vol. 4. Exposing Antichrists. Item Ten: They Despise the Truth, Brazenly Flout Principles, and Ignore the Arrangements of God’s House (Part Four)). God says that hating the truth and opposing God is the nature essence of an antichrist, and I realized that I was revealing the disposition of an antichrist. I was annoyed by and resistant to the leaders’ supervision. I felt that it wasted our time, and they were asking too much of us by letting us improve our work results. I did not want to obey, and continued to oppose. Actually, the leaders were pointing out the problems and deviations in our work, and I should have accepted it and earnestly reflected on the underlying reasons for such poor work results: whether it was a negligent attitude toward doing my duty, or that I couldn’t see through things, and couldn’t use the truth to resolve the brothers’ and sisters’ difficulties and problems. After finding the reasons, I should have quickly turned things around and changed. But I didn’t accept the truth or reflect at all, and I didn’t blame myself or feel guilty for not doing my duty well. To avoid being dismissed, I tried everything to incite everyone to join me in opposing the leaders. God requires that the leaders follow up on and supervise the work, which is a positive thing. But I resisted and opposed. From the outside, it looked like I was resisting the leaders, but essentially, I was averse to the truth and hated positive things, and was obstructing and disrupting the church’s work. Seeing how I was averse to the truth and even opposing God, I realized how terrible my satanic disposition was! I thought about certain antichrists who were expelled from the church. When they were helped, corrected, and pruned, they never accepted the truth or reflected on themselves. If anyone supervised their work or gave them suggestions, they would fly into a rage due to feeling humiliated, and then they saw that person as an enemy. They would stubbornly rant and rave, oppose to the very end, and even do evil that seriously harmed the church’s work, yet they felt no remorse. Ultimately, they were expelled by the church. This was all caused by their antichrist nature, which was averse to and hated the truth. Didn’t I reveal the same disposition as those antichrists? If I didn’t repent, sooner or later I would also be revealed by God and eliminated.

Later, I also pondered: Why had I incited the sisters to oppose the leaders’ supervision? What was the root cause of that? In my seeking, I came upon this passage of God’s words: “Until people have experienced God’s work and understood the truth, it is Satan’s nature that takes charge and dominates them from within. What, specifically, does that nature entail? For example, why are you selfish? Why do you protect your own position? Why do you have such strong feelings? Why do you enjoy those unrighteous things? Why do you like those evils? What is the basis for your fondness for such things? Where do these things come from? Why are you so happy to accept them? By now, you have all come to understand that the main reason behind all these things is that Satan’s poison is within man. So what is Satan’s poison? How can it be expressed? For example, if you ask, ‘How should people live? What should people live for?’ people will answer, ‘Every man for himself and the devil take the hindmost.’ This single phrase expresses the very root of the problem. Satan’s philosophy and logic have become people’s lives. No matter what people pursue, they do so for themselves—and so they live only for themselves. ‘Every man for himself and the devil take the hindmost’—this is the life philosophy of man, and it also represents human nature. These words have already become the nature of corrupt mankind and they are the true portrait of corrupt mankind’s satanic nature. This satanic nature has already become the basis for corrupt mankind’s existence. For several thousand years, corrupt mankind has lived by this venom of Satan, right up to the present day. Everything that Satan does is for the sake of its own desires, ambitions, and aims. It wishes to surpass God, to break free of God, and to seize control of all things created by God. Today, such is the extent that people have been corrupted by Satan: They all have satanic natures, they all try to deny and oppose God, and they want to control their own fates and try to oppose the orchestrations and arrangements of God. Their ambitions and desires are exactly the same as Satan’s. Therefore, man’s nature is Satan’s nature(The Word, Vol. 3. The Discourses of Christ of the Last Days. How to Walk the Path of Peter). After I finished reading God’s words, I realized that the main reason I acted that way was because of my satanic nature, the satanic disposition within me. I lived by the satanic philosophy that says, “Every man for himself and the devil take the hindmost,” and had become incredibly selfish and deceitful. Everything I did and said was to protect myself and safeguard my interests. I was afraid that when the leaders supervised our work and discovered problems in how I did my duty, I would be dismissed. So I connived and plotted, sowing dissatisfaction against the leaders, winning over and inciting the brothers and sisters to join me in a united front to oppose the leaders’ supervision. That would let the leaders know that it wasn’t just me who had low work efficiency, but it was a collective problem. To safeguard my status, I thought about how to deal with the leaders and protect myself, which harmed the church’s work. The more I reflected, the more I felt my lack of humanity. In my heart, I felt deep remorse, and prayed to God, “Oh God! I have committed evil and disturbed the church’s work. I am willing to fully repent, accept the leaders’ supervision and guidance, and conscientiously fulfill my duty as a created being.”

Through reading God’s words, I later came to understand how to correctly treat the leaders’ supervision and guidance. Almighty God says: “Although, today, many people do a duty, there are only a few who pursue the truth. Very few people pursue the truth and enter reality as they do their duty; for most, there are still no principles to the way they do things, they are still not people who truly submit to God; they merely claim that they love the truth, and are willing to pursue the truth, and are willing to strive for the truth, yet it is still unknown how long their resolve will last. People who do not pursue the truth are liable to reveal their corrupt dispositions at any time or place. They are devoid of any sense of responsibility toward their duty, they are often perfunctory, they act as they wish, and are even incapable of accepting pruning. As soon as they become negative and weak, they are liable to abandon their duty—this happens often, nothing is more common; such is the way all who do not pursue the truth behave. And so, when people have yet to gain the truth, they are unreliable and untrustworthy. What does it mean that they are untrustworthy? It means that when they encounter difficulties or setbacks, they are likely to fall down, and to become negative and weak. Is someone who is often negative and weak someone who is trustworthy? Definitely not. But people who understand the truth are different. People who truly understand the truth are bound to have a God-fearing heart, and a heart of submission to God, and only people with a God-fearing heart are trustworthy people; people without a God-fearing heart are not trustworthy. How should people without a God-fearing heart be approached? They should, of course, be given loving assistance and support. They should be followed up on more as they do their duty, and given more help and instruction; only then can they be guaranteed to do their duty effectively. And what is the aim of doing this? The chief aim is to uphold the work of God’s house. Secondary to this is in order to promptly identify problems, to promptly provide to them, support them, or prune them, setting right their deviations, and making up for their shortcomings and deficiencies. This is beneficial to people; there is nothing malicious about it. Supervising people, observing them, trying to understand them—this is all in order to help them enter the right track of faith in God, to enable them to do their duty as God asks and according to principle, to stop them from causing any disturbances or disruptions, and to stop them from doing futile work. The aim of doing this is entirely about showing responsibility toward them and toward the work of God’s house; there is no malice to it(The Word, Vol. 5. The Responsibilities of Leaders and Workers. The Responsibilities of Leaders and Workers (7)). “The house of God supervises, observes, and tries to understand those who do a duty. Are you able to accept this principle of the house of God? (Yes.) It is a wonderful thing if you can accept God’s house supervising, observing, and trying to understand you. It is of help to you in fulfilling your duty, in being able to do your duty in a way that is up to standard and to satisfy God’s intentions. It benefits and helps you, without any downside at all. Once you have understood this principle, should you not then no longer have any feelings of resistance or guardedness against the supervision of leaders, workers, and God’s chosen people? Even though sometimes someone tries to understand you, observes you, and supervises your work, this is not something to take personally. Why do I say this? Because the tasks that are now yours, the duty you perform, and any work that you do are not the private affairs or personal job of any one person; they touch on the work of God’s house and relate to one part of God’s work. Therefore, when anyone spends a little time supervising or observing you, or gets to understand you on a deep level, trying to have a heart-to-heart with you and find out what your state has been like during this time, and even sometimes when their attitude is a little harsher, and they prune, discipline, and reproach you a bit, this is all because they have a conscientious and responsible attitude toward the work of the house of God. You should not have any negative thoughts or emotions toward this. What does it mean if you can accept it when others supervise, observe, and try to understand you? That, in your heart, you accept the scrutiny of God. If you do not accept people’s supervision, observation, and attempts to understand you—if you push back against all this—are you able to accept the scrutiny of God? The scrutiny of God is more detailed, in-depth, and accurate than when people try to understand you; God’s requirements are more specific, exacting, and in-depth. If you cannot accept being supervised by God’s chosen people, are your claims that you can accept God’s scrutiny not empty words? For you to be able to accept God’s scrutiny and examination, you must first accept being supervised by the house of God, the leaders and workers, or the brothers and sisters(The Word, Vol. 5. The Responsibilities of Leaders and Workers. The Responsibilities of Leaders and Workers (7)). Through God’s words I realized that because of the satanic corrupt disposition within us, we often do our duty as we please. And given our serious scumminess and laziness, in doing our duty we are often perfunctory, don’t strive to achieve results, and violate principles in many areas. We therefore need more supervision and follow-up on our work by leaders and workers to ensure that all items of the church’s work progress smoothly. That is what God requires of leaders and workers—that’s their job. I should have submitted to and accepted supervision and guidance from the leaders and workers. I also had the wrong point of view, feeling that the leaders’ constant supervision and detailed questioning would waste time that we could be using to do our duty, which would impact our work results. But in fact, the leaders wanted a detailed understanding of our work to find problems, help us to resolve them and rectify deviations, which would make our work more effective. It was not a waste of time. For example, one time when the leaders were following up on our work, they discovered that in watering newcomers we lacked a sense of caring and patience, and our demands on them were too high. That made some newcomers negative, and they did not do their duty. We only realized our own deviations in doing our duty through the leaders’ fellowshipping and guidance. Thereafter, we found God’s words directed toward the newcomers’ difficulties to fellowship with them so they would understand the meaning of doing one’s duty, and we made reasonable arrangements for their duties based on their actual stature. Afterward, the newcomers’ state improved, and they were able to do their duty normally. I saw that the leaders’ supervision and guidance not only did not negatively impact our work results, but also helped us to grasp principles in doing our duty. These were all benefits of accepting supervision and guidance from leaders and workers about our work. I understood that accepting supervision from leaders and workers is a responsible attitude toward the church’s work, and an essential principle of practice in doing one’s duty.

Some time later, the leaders arranged for me to continue watering newcomers, and my heart was full of gratitude to God. After that, whenever the leaders followed up and provided guidance about the work, I wasn’t so resistant. I could combine the issues the leaders discovered and proactively discuss them together with my partnered brothers and sisters, and we summarized the deviations in our duty. As we saw the existing issues more clearly, our work gradually became more effective. I truly felt that to get good results in doing our duty, we must accept the supervision and guidance from the leaders and workers, adopt an attitude of acceptance toward the truth, and act according to the truth principles. Thanks be to God!

Previous: 35. What Lies Behind Being Lenient With Others

Next: 37. What Stopped Me From Practicing the Truth

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