32. Learning From the Failures of Others
In October 2022, two video work supervisors were dismissed. This was because our leader had repeatedly stressed the importance of this work but they never had any urgency. They just attended to general affairs and didn’t resolve any problems, or actually participate in video production, which held back the work. The leader was very angry and said that people like them were slippery and irresponsible, disengaged from their work, and not suited to being supervisors, so he dismissed them immediately. I was shocked to hear this. I thought that they were doing their duty normally. Even if they were a little inefficient, passive, and didn’t bear a burden, that wasn’t such a big issue. Everyone was like that, to a certain degree. Did they really deserve to be dismissed for that? Later, the leader asked us how we usually did our duties: Were we pushing ourselves, giving it our all, and really working hard? Were we trying to be as efficient and productive as possible? Hearing these questions made me so nervous that I didn’t dare raise my head. I knew that I wasn’t even close to meeting those standards, and hearing the leader expose and dissect those supervisors as disengaged, irresponsible in their duties, and not having any urgency, made me even more nervous. I realized that I’d been doing my duty like that too. Not long before, the leader had arranged for me to follow up on the video work, and at first, I sought the principles, studied the relevant skills, and thought about how to get the work done quickly. But after a few days I started to think, “Video production is pretty complex. I’ve just started and there’s much I’m still unfamiliar with; problems are unavoidable. I’ll just do what I can. It’ll end up being checked by the leader anyway. Even if there are problems, he’ll understand.” So I just did things in a routine way each day. I spoke of the urgency of the work, but when the leader wasn’t pressing us, our work efficiency decreased unknowingly. Work that could have been done in a week took twice as long, and I also stopped following up on the watering work I was responsible for. Sometimes I’d feel guilty, but I felt the work wasn’t being delayed too much, so I didn’t worry about it. Later, the leader put me in charge of other work, and I kept the same attitude. Though I looked busy on the outside, I didn’t have any sense of urgency or solve many real problems. Sometimes I’d wonder, “I’m responsible for more work, so my schedule should be busier, I should have more things to worry about, and I should feel more stressed. Why don’t I feel that way? I feel quite relaxed at the end of the day.” I thought about planning out my time more wisely and tightening my schedule, so that I’d be more efficient and get more work done. But then I thought, “I’m already quite busy. Why ask so much of myself?” So I dropped the idea. I didn’t feel any urgency in my duty until those two supervisors were dismissed. The leader had set two standards for our duties: We had to stretch ourselves and give it our all, and be as efficient and productive as possible. I was achieving neither of those. In my duty, I was mostly being slippery and perfunctory. I had no God-fearing heart, let alone loyalty. I felt gripped by an unspeakable fear. If the leader found out about my attitude, would I be the next one dismissed? If I didn’t change my ways, I could be revealed any second. I came before God in prayer, “God, I’ve been so slippery in my duty lately. I’m afraid that one day I’ll be revealed and eliminated. But what I feel more in my heart is fear and anxiety, and I don’t have true knowledge or hatred of my corrupt disposition. Please guide me to know myself and amend my incorrect state.”
Later on, I wondered, “Why have the dismissals of those supervisors made me so afraid and guarded against God?” I realized it was partly because I couldn’t see through to the essence of their problems. I thought their issues weren’t that serious, so I wasn’t able to truly accept what happened to them. I found the relevant words of God for this issue. God’s word says: “All God’s chosen people are now practicing performing their duties, and God makes use of people’s performance of their duties to perfect one group of people and eliminate another. So, it is the performance of duty that reveals each sort of person, and each sort of deceitful person, disbeliever, and evil person is revealed and eliminated in the performance of their duty. Those who perform their duties loyally are honest people; those who are consistently perfunctory are deceitful, shrewd people, and they are disbelievers; and those who cause disruptions and disturbances in performing their duties are evil people and antichrists. Right now, a wide range of problems still exist in many of those who perform duties. Some people are always very passive in their duties, always sitting and waiting and relying on others. What sort of attitude is that? It is irresponsibility. God’s house has arranged for you to do a duty, yet you ponder on it for days without getting any concrete work done. You are nowhere to be seen at the workplace, and people cannot find you when they have problems that need resolving. You do not bear a burden for this work. If a leader inquires about the work, what will you tell them? You are not doing any kind of work right now. You are well aware that this work is your responsibility, but you do not do it. What on earth are you thinking? Do you not do any work because you are incapable of it? Or are you just greedy for comfort? What attitude do you have toward your duty? You only talk about words and doctrines, and you only say pleasant-sounding things, but you do not do any actual work. If you do not wish to perform your duty, you should resign. Do not hold your position and not do anything there. Is doing so not inflicting harm on God’s chosen people and compromising the work of the church? In the way you talk, you seem to understand all manner of doctrine, but when asked to perform a duty, you are perfunctory, and not conscientious in the least. Is that expending yourself sincerely for God? You are not sincere when it comes to God, yet you feign sincerity. Are you capable of deceiving Him? In the way you usually talk, there seems to be such great faith; you would like to be the pillar of the church and its rock. But when you perform a duty, you are less useful than a matchstick. Is this not deceiving God with your eyes wide open? Do you know what will come of you trying to deceive God? He will spurn and eliminate you! All people are revealed in performing their duties—just set a person to a duty, and it will not take long before it is revealed whether they are an honest person or a deceitful person, and whether or not they are a lover of the truth” (The Word, Vol. 3. The Discourses of Christ of the Last Days. Only an Honest Person Can Live Out True Human Likeness). God’s word made it clear: Those who are always perfunctory and slippery in their duties, and satisfied with just scrounging off the church with what little they do, are of poor humanity, slippery and deceitful by nature, and don’t truly expend for God. In the end they are all eliminated by God. I thought back to those dismissed supervisors. They were in charge of such important work but only took on the post of “supervisor.” They had no burden in their hearts, and did their duties in a routine way each day without reviewing why their work was so inefficient, what problems others were having in their duties, or how they should be guiding or following up on work. The others kept reminding them to be more proactive, to plan the work wisely, and increase its efficiency. They promised to do so, but then didn’t make any changes. They were passive and had to be pushed to do work. One of them in particular was well-spoken, gifted, and had caliber, but after more than a month as supervisor, she still didn’t know the basics of the work or how the team members were arranged. She was very perfunctory and irresponsible. I thought of how clearly God’s word fellowshipped the responsibilities of leaders and how our leader had often spoken of the meaning and importance of doing our duties. They knew all this and were still perfunctory. They weren’t people who loved or pursued the truth and they had no God-fearing hearts at all. I remembered that God said: “If you do not take God’s commissions seriously, then you are betraying Him in the most grievous way. In this, you are more lamentable than Judas, and should be cursed” (The Word, Vol. 3. The Discourses of Christ of the Last Days. How to Know Man’s Nature). Before, I thought that only those who refused to do or gave up on their duties were betraying God, but from God’s words I saw that when the church gives a person an important task, if they’re sluggish, careless, always have a perfunctory attitude, and cause losses upon the work, then that’s negligence and betrayal. It wasn’t harsh of the leader to dismiss those supervisors. It was in line with God’s word and the principles. I hadn’t been able to accept it because I wasn’t seeing people and things according to God’s word, which made me guard against God. I was truly ignorant! I realized that my behavior was much like theirs, so I needed to reflect on the problems in my own duty quickly.
Later on, I found the words of God relating to my state and attitude toward duty to practice and enter into. God’s word says: “If you are not assiduous in reading God’s words, and you do not understand the truth, then you cannot reflect on yourself; you will merely be satisfied with making a token effort and committing no evils or transgressions, and use this as capital. You will pass each day in a muddle, live in a state of confusion, merely do things on schedule, never use your heart to examine yourself or put effort into knowing yourself; you will always be perfunctory. In this way, you will never perform your duty to an acceptable standard. To put all your effort into something, you must first put all your heart into it; only when you first put all your heart into something can you put all your effort into it, and do your best. Today, there are those who have begun to be assiduous in performing their duty, they have begun to think about how to properly perform the duty of a created being in order to satisfy God’s heart. They are not negative and lazy, they do not passively wait for the Above to issue orders, but take some initiative. Judging by your performance of your duty, you are a little more effective than before, and although it is still below standard, there has been a little growth—which is good. But you must not be satisfied with the status quo, you must keep searching, keep growing—only then will you perform your duty better, and reach an acceptable standard. However, when some people perform their duty, they never pull out all the stops and give it their all, they only give 50 to 60 percent of their effort, and just make do until what they are doing is done. They can never maintain a state of normalcy: When there’s no one to keep an eye on them or offer support, they slacken off and lose heart; when there’s someone to fellowship the truth, they perk up, but if the truth isn’t fellowshipped to them for a while, they become indifferent. What is the problem when they always go back and forth like this? This is how people are when they haven’t gained the truth, they all live by passion, which is incredibly difficult to maintain: They must have someone preach and fellowship to them every day; once there is no one to water and provide for them, and no one to support them, their hearts go cold again, they slacken once more. And when their hearts slacken, they become less effective in their duty; if they work harder, effectiveness increases, their results in performing their duties are better, and they gain more” (The Word, Vol. 3. The Discourses of Christ of the Last Days. In Believing in God, What Is Most Important Is to Practice and Experience His Words). From God’s word, I learned that we must take initiative to perform our duties adequately. We must be willing to work hard, suffer and pay a price. Also, we must do our best at everything we can, put our whole hearts into it, fulfill our responsibilities, and achieve results, and not just fool others or go through the motions. That’s doing a duty adequately. When the leader put me in charge of video work, at first, I wanted to get better at following up on the work, and really studied the skills and principles, but after doing it for a while, I found video work to be very difficult. I’d just started, there was still so much I didn’t know, and I needed to suffer and pay a price, so I started to slack off and my schedule was loose. Though I looked busy every day, I wasn’t working efficiently or getting that much real work done. I even had time to think about what I’d eat or drink, and when there was time, I’d take a rest, go out for a stroll, or have some fun. I had the title of supervisor, but I was more idle in my duty than the others. When I ran up against difficulties in work, I didn’t think to seek the principles or find someone who understood to help, I aimed for “good enough” and “more or less,” and then left the rest up to the leader to check. Because I was perfunctory and didn’t seek real results in my duty, the leader could always find problems in my work and it had to be sent back for revision, delaying our progress. I wasn’t putting all my effort into my duty, let alone all of my heart. I was doing it in a perfunctory, adulterated way, and I wasn’t truly paying a price. Even if I put in some effort, I didn’t get real results. How was that doing a duty? I was clearly fooling and deceiving God! I felt so guilty when I realized this. The church was training me as a supervisor, hoping that I’d be responsible and get the church work done properly, but I was just slacking off. I was truly unconscionable. I was treating my duty like a nonbeliever working for a boss, and my performance wasn’t even up to the standard of laboring. I recalled a passage of God’s word: “The standard God demands for the performance of your duty is that it is ‘adequate.’ What does it mean to be ‘adequate’? It means to meet God’s demands and satisfy Him. God must say it is adequate and it must receive His approval. Only then will the performance of your duty have been adequate. If God says it is not adequate, no matter how long you have been performing your duty, or how much of a price you have paid, it is not adequate. Then what will the result be? It will all be classified as laboring. Only a minority of laborers with loyal hearts will be spared. If they are not loyal in their laboring, then they do not have a hope of being spared. Speaking plainly, they will be destroyed in a disaster” (The Word, Vol. 3. The Discourses of Christ of the Last Days. What Is the Adequate Performance of Duty?). God’s word made me realize I wasn’t even achieving the most basic standard of conscience in my duty. This attitude was hated by God and made me unworthy of salvation. The dismissal of those two supervisors was a warning for me. I saw that those who are perfunctory and careless in their duties can’t stand firm in the church. In the end, they are revealed and eliminated. Though I was doing a duty in the church, this didn’t mean that I was doing it adequately. If I didn’t amend my state as soon as possible, even if the church didn’t eliminate me, I would be eliminated by God. That is decided by God’s righteous disposition. Realizing this, I prayed to God, “God, I’m not paying a true price in my duty, I’m so perfunctory, and I have so many regrets. I now realize how dangerous my state is, and that I can’t keep having this attitude toward my duty. I want to properly repent and do my duty as best I can.”
After this, I wondered, “I know how important my responsibilities are, but I often can’t help but slack off and not want to pay a price in my duty. What is the reason for this?” I read God’s word: “What kind of manifestations and characteristics do those who are excessively lazy display? Firstly, in whatever they are doing, they act perfunctorily, dawdle about, go at a leisurely pace, and rest and procrastinate whenever possible. Secondly, they pay no mind to the church’s work. To them, whoever likes worrying about such things may do so. They will not. When they do worry about something, it’s for the sake of their own fame, gain, and status—all that matters for them is that they are able to enjoy the benefits of status. Thirdly, they shy away from hardship in their work; they cannot accept their work being even slightly tiring, becoming very resentful if it is, and they are unable to bear hardship or pay a price. Fourthly, they are unable to persevere in whatever work they do, always giving up halfway and unable to see things through. If they’re momentarily in a good mood, they might do some work for fun, but if something requires long-term commitment, and it keeps them busy, requires a lot of thought, and fatigues their flesh, over time they will begin to grumble. For instance, some leaders are in charge of church work, and they find it new and fresh at first. They are very motivated in their fellowship of the truth and when they see brothers and sisters have problems, they are able to help and resolve them. But, after persisting for a while, they start to find the work of being a leader too exhausting, and they become negative—they wish to switch to an easier job, and are not willing to bear hardship. Such people lack perseverance. Fifthly, another characteristic that distinguishes lazy people is their unwillingness to do real work. As soon as their flesh suffers, they come up with excuses to evade and shirk their work, or pass it off to someone else. And when that person finishes the work, they shamelessly reap the rewards themselves. These are the five major characteristics of lazy people. You should check to see if there are such lazy people among the leaders and workers in the churches. If you find one, they should be dismissed immediately. Can lazy people do good work as leaders? No matter what kind of caliber they have or the quality of their humanity, if they are lazy, they will be unable to do their work well, and they will delay the work and important matters. The church’s work is multifaceted; each aspect of it entails many detailed tasks and requires fellowshipping about the truth to resolve problems in order to be done well. Therefore, leaders and workers must be diligent—they have to do a lot of talking and a lot of work every day to ensure the work’s effectiveness. If they speak or do too little, there will be no results. So, if a leader or worker is a lazy person, they are certainly a false leader and are incapable of doing real work. Lazy people do not do real work, much less go themselves to work sites, and they are not willing to resolve problems or involve themselves in any specific work. They do not have the slightest understanding or grasp of the problems in any work. They only have a superficial, vague idea in their heads from listening to what others have said, and they muddle through by just preaching a bit of doctrine. Are you able to discern this kind of leader? Are you able to tell that they are false leaders? (To a degree.) Lazy people are perfunctory in whatever duty they do. No matter the duty, they lack perseverance, work in fits and starts, and complain whenever they suffer some hardships, pouring out unending grievances. They hurl abuse at whoever criticizes or prunes them, like a shrew insulting people in the streets, always wanting to vent their anger at others, and not wanting to do their duty. What does it show that they do not want to do their duty? It shows that they do not bear a burden, are unwilling to take on responsibility, and are lazy people. They do not want to suffer hardships or pay the price. This especially applies to leaders and workers: If they do not bear a burden, can they fulfill the responsibilities of leaders and workers? Absolutely not” (The Word, Vol. 5. The Responsibilities of Leaders and Workers. The Responsibilities of Leaders and Workers (4)). Pondering God’s word made me realize why I lacked perseverance in my duty, and why, after a brief burst of zeal, I no longer wanted to pay a price for it. It was mainly because I was so lazy and craved fleshly comfort too much. I didn’t seek efficiency in my work. If no leader pushed or pruned me, I lacked urgency. In particular, when I ran up against some issues in the work, I was very unwilling to expend mental energy on them, always indulging myself with the excuse that I’d just started, and pushing problems onto the leader. I would think to myself, “We should enjoy ourselves while we’re still alive. No matter how urgent the work is, we shouldn’t mistreat or overwork ourselves. So long as I’m not eliminated, I’m fine with just putting in a little effort and doing a little work.” I never sought to progress, which meant I improved very slowly. I thought about my brothers and sisters: Some of them put so much time and energy into finishing tasks, always focusing on their duties. Even when they’d finished their work, they kept pondering on if there were any deviations in it, and how they could do better. All they thought of was how to do their duties well. They did proper work, they had humanity, and were loyal to their duties. They easily gained the guidance of the Holy Spirit in their work, and over time they improved and made gains. However, I had been put in charge of video work by the church, but I had no conscience, my views on pursuit were like an animal’s. When I had time, I’d think about my fleshly desires and not about my duty at all. I had a post, but I wasn’t doing real work, which not only stopped us from getting good results, but also delayed the work. I was so selfish and despicable! If I carried on like that, I wouldn’t be able to take on any work, I’d achieve nothing, and be bound to be eliminated by God. I came before God in prayer, “God, my scummy nature is too serious. I’m being irresponsible and slippery in such important work and I have no trace of a God-fearing heart. Before, I knew my scumminess was serious, but didn’t truly hate it. I know this now. God, I want to change. I want to amend my attitude and views toward my duty, and do it properly. Please guide me to resolve my corrupt disposition and live out some human likeness.”
I later recalled another passage of God’s word that I’d read: “You must at least be clear of conscience in doing your duty, and you must at least be worthy of your three meals a day and not be freeloading. This is called having a sense of responsibility. Whether your caliber is high or low, and whether or not you understand the truth, in any case, you must have this attitude: ‘Since this work was given to me to do, I must treat it seriously, I must make it my concern, and I must use all my heart and strength to do it well. As for whether I can do it perfectly well, I can’t presume to offer a guarantee, but my attitude is that I’ll do my best to perform it well, and I certainly won’t be perfunctory about it. If a problem arises in work, I should take responsibility then, and ensure I draw a lesson from it and do my duty well.’ This is the right attitude. Do you have such an attitude? Some people say, ‘I don’t necessarily need to do a good job on the work I’m assigned. I’ll just do what I can and the end product will be what it will be. I don’t need to tire myself so much, or become wracked with anxiety if I do something wrong, and I don’t need to take on so much stress. What’s the point of making myself so tired? After all, I’m always working and I’m not freeloading.’ This kind of attitude toward one’s duty is irresponsible. ‘If I feel like working, I’ll do some work. I’ll do what I can and the end product will be what it will be. There’s no need to take it so seriously.’ Such people do not have a responsible attitude toward their duty and they lack a sense of responsibility. What kind of person are you? If you are the first kind of person, then you’re someone with reason and humanity. If you’re the second kind of person, then you’re no different from the kind of false leaders I’ve just dissected. You’re just idling your days away. ‘I’ll avoid fatigue and hardship and just enjoy myself more. Even if one day I’m dismissed, I won’t have lost anything. At least I’ll have enjoyed the benefits of status for a few days, it won’t be a loss for me. If I’m selected as a leader, that’s how I’ll act.’ What do you think of the mindset of this kind of person? Such people are disbelievers who do not pursue the truth in the slightest. If you truly have a sense of responsibility, then it shows that you have conscience and reason. No matter how large or small the task, no matter who assigns you that task, whether God’s house entrusts you with it or a church leader or worker assigns it to you, your attitude should be: ‘Since this duty has been assigned to me, it is God’s exaltation and grace. I should do it well according to the truth principles. Despite having average caliber, I’m willing to take on this responsibility and give it all I have to do it well. If I do a poor job, I should take responsibility for it, and if I do a good job, this isn’t a credit to me. This is what I ought to do.’ Why do I say that how one treats one’s duty is a matter of principle? If you really have a sense of responsibility and are a responsible person, then you will be able to take on the church’s work and fulfill the duty you are supposed to. If you take your duty lightly, then your view on belief in God is incorrect, and your attitude toward God and your duty is problematic” (The Word, Vol. 5. The Responsibilities of Leaders and Workers. The Responsibilities of Leaders and Workers (8)). From God’s word I understood that responsible people do things diligently. No matter if they like the work or are good at it and regardless of their caliber, they approach it with honesty, and earnestly do their very best to perform it well. These people keep to their word, are trustworthy, and can gain God’s approval. Conversely, if a person agrees to take on a duty, but then only does enough to save face, and does nothing real, and doesn’t seek results or efficiency, then they’re just like the loafers and slackers of the world. They are untrustworthy and unreliable. That was how I’d been doing my duty. I always considered the flesh and rarely practiced the truth. I was living with less and less human likeness. I had to fix my attitude toward my duty. Regardless of my work capabilities, the church had entrusted me with this task, so I had to try as hard as I could to do it well and put all my energy into it. Now is a crucial time to do one’s duty. If I kept doing less than my best, and waited until God’s work had ended to put in more effort, it’d be too late to repent. After this thought, I remade my schedule in order to do as much more work as I could. When I felt like being lazy, I prayed to God and thought about His words, which made me vigilant and able to rebel against the flesh. I would pray to Him before each task, asking Him to scrutinize my heart, trying to do a good job, and not just going through the motions. Practicing like this makes me feel more at ease.
Though I wanted to do my duty properly, sometimes I fell short. Like one day, I was checking on the watering work: One newcomer still had lots of religious notions, which the waterer asked me to help resolve. At first, I wanted to try my best to help, no matter how much I could achieve. But when I actually spoke to the newcomer, I only had a patchy knowledge of some of the problems and couldn’t fellowship clearly. I couldn’t help but think, “My understanding of the truth is shallow; this is all I can achieve. The leader will follow up on this anyway. I’ll let him resolve these problems.” But the leader was busy and couldn’t come, so it was up to us to resolve them. I knew that God’s intention was behind this situation. I used to pick easy and straightforward tasks in my duty and not stretch myself or put my all into it. I couldn’t consider the flesh or seek comfort this time. I had to do everything I could, no matter what I was able to achieve. Then my partnered sister and I found the waterer to fellowship with, and we found words of God and gospel videos related to the religious notions of the newcomer. After some discussion, we all became clearer on this aspect of the truth, and in the end, the newcomer’s problems were resolved. Having experienced this, I see that some things may seem difficult, but if I rely on God, and really pay a price, I can achieve results. If I work hard and still fall short of it, then I’ll have a clear conscience.
By looking at the failures of some brothers and sisters around me, I have learned some lessons, reflected on the attitude I had toward my duty, and seen how far I was from doing it adequately. And I’ve seen how deeply rooted my scummy nature was. Though I’m repentant now, I’m still short of God’s requirements. From now on, I have to accept God’s scrutiny and try to do my duty adequately!